A bunch of little things…

What’s up…instead of making like 5 little posts dedicated to a link or a thought, I figured I’d knock them all out right here. So, this is just a bunch of random shit concerning music, links and joy.

First off,
If you wanna peep clips from my new album “Interludes after Midnight”, Ninja tune is steaming them from their site:

Now, I realize the album has been leaked. And While hearing this (or just reading it right here) will no doubt lead to more than a few of you just going to find a download link right now, there’s nothing I can really do about it. Albums get leaked. It’s happened before and it will happen again. Do I like it? not really. I think I’m more bummed that it’s supposed to drop on May 5th so having it leak this soon is a bit early for my taste. On one hand, it’s cool that people are into it so much that they’re rushing to download (it was the #1 download on what.cd yesterday) but it’s hard to separate that from the fact that no one’s gonna buy the record. But, that’s what making music in 2012 is like so all i can do is accept it. So, if you downloaded it (and enjoyed it), do me the solid and come to a show when I’m in your town. Then we’re even.
For those of you who do still buy music, there will be a vinyl release as well as a bonus 7″ featuring two songs that didn’t make the album. Those two songs will also be available digitally via I-Tunes and the Ninja Tune Website.
Regardless of how you hear it and when, I hope you enjoy the album. I put in a lot of work on it and all I can ask is that , if you do download it today or tomorrow, actually listen to it. Don’t do that thing where you listen to the first 20 seconds then skip to the next track. My albums don’t work like that. Every song is constantly evolving. The songs have a beginning, a middle and an end. This isn’t a mixtape by Gucci Mane.

Oh and to all the people asking me how it leaked, the blame lies on the press. Ninja tune sent out press copies last week and within 4 days it was upped somewhere. So, whoever did that, you’re a dickhead and your blog/magazine/whatever-it-is-you-write-for sucks. I understand it’s fun to share but have some consideration for the artists. I mean, if your job is to review music, that must mean ,on some level, you both enjoy and respect music. Well, in the future, try and do that without being an album leaking asshole. It’s really not that hard. I realize it sounds like I’m scathingly bitter right now, but really, it’s all part of the game. I understand that. I feel more like disappointed father who just found his son jerking off to granny porn.

Some of them got uploaded to youtube already…Enjoy.

Also, here’s a little video the good people at Mushpost put together showing highlights of a recent show I did in Burlington AKA THE BURL.

Blockhead + kuxxan SUUM. Club Metronome, BTV from Brandon Jones on Vimeo.

What else…

Oh, hey, you like to laugh? Continuing with my on going campaign to big up sir Jarlsberg, here’s a link to hilarious radio interview the man himself did (featuring friend Lord Richard) on Benchwarmer radio. It’s a sports talk show but the first half is pretty much a total bug out session. If you like sports, stick around for the second half as well.

If you’ve ever looked at the cover art for my album “The music Scene” and thought “hey , that shit is awesome” then I’d like to inform you that the artist ,Owen Brozman , just illustrated a graphic novel called “Nature of the beast”. It’s written by the same guy who wrote “Go the fuck to sleep”.
Anyway, it’s awesome and , if your a graphic novel type of person, I think you should go buy that shit…

Last but not least, my boy Billy Woods just dropped the first single off his upcoming album “History will Absolve me”. It’s fucking ridiculous. It features Masai Bey and Roc Marciano and it’s produced by Willie Green. As far as I’m concerned this is one of the best beats I’ve heard all year. Thunderous shit…Here’s a link

Some good old album tracks

There was a time when a person would buy a record, cassette or CD and take it home and listen to it. Weird, right? Back in that long lost time, albums had something known as “Singles”. A “single” was the first song off that album that would be leaked to radio stations. It was usually chosen because it was felt that song was the most easily digestible of all the tracks on that album. However, often, the lead single off an album wouldn’t be all that. In fact, in many cases, it was just the artists/labels failed attempt at crossing over to a larger audience. IF you were like me, in those days, you always loved a nice album track. These were the tracks buried on albums. They never got radio play, they never got played at shows…but they were often some of the best tracks on the album.
Because it’s been a while since I made you guys any compilations, I figured this would be as good angle to take.
Basically, there are some of my favorite “lost” (in the sense of forgotten, not rare) album cuts. Some of these are from some somewhat known rappers, others are fairly obscure.
If you’re a young person, these will all be new to you..if you’re old like me (and a rap nerd) this will be a walk down memory lane. Either way, they’re fucking good…Enjoy!
(This is part 1, I’ll post part two in an upcoming week)

Album tracks:
1)Can’t hold back: Dred Scott
2)Heels Without souls: Hard 2 Obtain
3)Mama’s always on stage: Arrested development
4)Southern Friend: P.E.A.C.E.
5)Street sweeper: Da Bushwackass
6)Fake Charades: Lewis Parker
7)Lost in Thought: Funkdoobiest
8)My cheating days are over: Rich Nice
9)The U is Smooth: Grand Daddy I.U.
10)All on my nutsac: Da Lench Mob
11)Cleopatra: YoYo
12)Tru Master; Tru Master
13)Crotch ripper-mad speaker: Trends of culture
14)Lingering: Jak Progresso
15)The streets are a battlefield: KMC
16)Ghetto instinct: Da King & I
17)Well of 100 souls: A-Teem.

P.S. I’m pretty sure I’ve given some of these away on my blog os “song of the day” joints but I can’t keep track of that shit so, you know, if you got’em from me already, let it go. It’s still free, bro.

Answers for questions Vol. 77

What it do, yall? (simply typing that sentence felt awkward). I’m back from a lovely weekend in S.F.. Thanks to all those of you who came to the show. I had a good time.
I’m always a little jet lagged when ever i came back from the west coast so I dunno how lucid these answers are gonna be…so, you know, my bad if I’m rambling.
Anyway, send me more questions! Interesting questions! Funny questions! Non-typical boring grandma questions!
send them to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave the in the comments below. Okaaaaay?!?!

The Music Scene was simply awesome when you dropped it, when can we expect your next instalment? Also the video for ‘The Music Scene’ is mind-blowing, who is the artist that did it and did you have any input into his creation?
Finally, Spotify has all of your albums up there but no Uncle Tony’s Coloring Book, why is that and can you do something about that?

I swear I didn’t write this question. Scouts honor.
The new album “Interludes after Midnight” drops April 30th. So, keep an eye out for that.
As for the Music Scene video, it was done by Anthony F. Schepperd

I had no input at all and that’s fine with me, cause that video is amazing. Basically, my record label was like “We’re gonna have some guy make an animated video, ok?” I was like ” sure”. I forgot about it and 6 months later that video showed up in my inbox. I was floored.

As for “Uncle tony’s coloring book” not being on spotify, that cause it was a limited release album. We only pressed 5000 copies of it and it’s digital release was limited as well. This mostly had to do with the insane samples on that album.

Do you follow college basketball at all? Any teams you’re interested in?
There are few things I care less about than college sports. I seriously get mad when I’m watching ESPN and the score ticker on the bottom is doing College sports scores. They go forever and WHO FUCKING CARESSSS?!?!?!!? These are fucking college kids. They’re no pro’s. I don’t go to that school. It really baffles me. Unless you’re a scout for the pro’s I see no reason to ever watch an amateur sport.
You will never see me tune a person out quicker then when someone gives me the “I only watch college sports cause it’s not a bunch of millionaires playing for pay checks” argument.
Thats like me saying “I only listen to demo tapes cause I don’t wanna here some millionaire sing songs to me”. Fuck that shit.

If your next album became enormously popular and you started to see photographers following you around every few days, how would you react to them?

I’d probably do what I do when anyone takes my picture. Make a stupid face. Luckily, I’m pretty sure I’ll never have to worry about being chased by paparazzi. They tend to not care much about underground hip hop producers.

Was interested in hearing any thoughts you might have on Charles Bradley. You mentioned that you enjoyed Donny Hathaway a month or two back. Made me think about how your beats have a certain soulfulness to them. Charles Bradley is no Donny Hathaway but he clearly picks up that 60s and 70s soul tradition. Here’s an extended clip of Bradley in Paris on Youtube. Apologizes if you don’t dig it.

Oh, so this is new?
I’d never heard of him prior to you sending me the clip. It sounds cool. There’s a whole school of people making old soul music today. I think it’s all really well done but I’d be lying if I said I really bumped it. I’d rather just listen to the actual old stuff. It’s kinda like when rappers make songs that sound like they were made in 1988. It’s well executed but if I wanted to hear that, I’d just put on Big Daddy Kane. I do appreciate that this is an old dude who obviously been doing it for years though.

How many gigs of music do you have on your computer?
I just looked. Excluding beats I’ve made, 183 gigs. I have no idea if that’s a ton or normal though.

Are you a big Dexter fan? And if you are did you think this season was a load of shit too?
I watch Dexter while whispering how shitty it is under my breath.
The fucked up thing about this last season is that I thought it started really strong and then it flew off the rails. It went from looking like one of the better seasons to being the dumbest season they’ve done thus far. Also, maybe I shouldn’t look at a show like that under too much of a microscope , but how many fucking serial killers can Miami have? According to Dexter, that place has a new one like every 2 months.

What are your opinions on college?

I’m a drop out who always hated school so, my opinion really doesn’t matter. I Think College is great if you want to work in a field that you need to be highly educated for. I think it’s a waste of time if you’re an artist. I think it’s a waste of time and money if you’re just going “To do it” and get a degree in something you can never apply to real life. I have tons of friends who’ve graduated college and over half of them are doing things they probably could have done without that education. At the same time, the people I know getting paid the most with real, adult jobs all went to college. So, yeah…good for them. I remember the feeling of dropping out and thinking “I’ll never have to write another paper again…”. It felt good man.But I got lucky with this music shit and could have easily been a career bartender.

Do you like Video games?
I used to play them a lot more but I haven’t given a shit about the in a while. When I did, I strictly played basketball and baseball games. Occasionally a racing game would slip in there too.
I never could get into games that take long term focus or that had to do with wizards and shit like that. I don’t even like movies about crap like that so, it’s not for me.

Who cleans your apartment? You, the lady? Teamwork? Hire a maid? Etc.

I got a cleaning lady , named Suzie (AKA Sweet sweet suzie) who comes once every two weeks. That’s when you know you’re balling…

I don’t know if you’ve touched on this or not but what’s the least annoying way if you’re an unknown producer to try to get someone (rappers, labels, etc.) to listen to your beats? Just @ing them on twitter? E-mailing the contact info? Are blogs really worth contacting (no offense)? I’ve tried all of the above but usually all I get is a “nice” and nothing else.

This is gonna be deflating but none of that shit works. I’ve never checked a link, a tweet or an email any unknown artist has ever sent me. I simply don’t really care plus, over the years, I’ve learned that most people are terrible at making music. The pushier they are, the worse the music usually is. That said, I’d say, of the avenues you can take, sending the music to blogs is the best idea. But just know which blogs. My blog? Not a good idea. My blog isn’t made to break new artists. The only music I post is my own or people I’m listening to in my spare time. But there are plenty of blogs out there who do seek out new music and are willing to listen. Find those guys, write them a nice email and send them a link to your shit. That’s the only way I can see it working.

What do you think of the group element of rap music? As in, most rappers either got their start in a group, or are currently in a group now, and it seems like its only getting worse with G-Unit, Rocafella Young Money, OFWGKTA, A$AP, and whatever the collective Kendrick Lamar is a part of.

I think the era of groups is kinda over. Sure, they still exist but the “I gotta get mine” way of thinking is way more prominent. Nowadays, there are “Crews” made up of different solo artists who will collaborate but it’s not like there are many Pharcyde’s or Clipse’s popping up much recently. If people are in groups today, I feel like it’s just a stepping stone to going solo. It makes sense though. Hip hop is very me-centric to the point where even producers start to rap , just so they can go solo.

Aesop interviews me.

If you like in depth interviews, you are in luck. Here’s a professional level discussion between aesop and I about all things ranging from politics to our creative process.
Just kidding. Here’s Aesop and I having a talk about sports (which he hates) and video games while I was hanging with him the past weekend.

Song of the day 3/16/12

Big dealer by Ballin’ Jack

Looking at the name, you might assume “Ballin’ Jack” is the new ill-named swag rapper. Well, you’re wrong , bro. This is some random rock/soul joint I came across while mining for samples recently. To say me finding songs I actually like during sample mining is rare, would be an understatement. In my life, I’ve probably found like 5. This is cause I tend to not really dig through soul records. Mostly cause, if I like the music, I don’t really wanna sample it.
Whatever the case, this song is dope. I could do the not-lazy thing and wikipedia Ballin’ Jack but , alas, I’m too lazy. It’s pretty shameful on my part but if you rally wanna know more, I’m sure you can figure it out.
Sorry…I’m grumpy today cause I got up at 7 am to catch a flight to San Fran. don’t fuck with a mans sleep.

Ask Dr. Tony Vol. 13

What’s up everyone.
Here’s another installment of the best advice you could ever ask for. I’ll be honest…I’ll try to not to flower shit up too much cause life simply isn’t black and white. I also have no background or education in this sort of thing so, you know, take it all with a grain of salt. I mean, if you’re really basing serious life choices on my opinion, you got problems beyond anything I can fix.
ANYHOO, Send me more questions like this to my email: phatfriendblog@gmail.com or in the comments below. Despite what I wrote above, i think i do give decent perspective and, really, I’m here to help…

Dr. Tony,

I have a problem you might not’ve encountered in a number of years. I’m 19, in my first year of college. Like any fresh-out-of-highschooler, i was disappointed when college turned out not to be the nonstop fuckfest that we all thought it would be. Fast forward one semester and I’m still a virgin, though i’ve gotten a BJ/HJ here or there. ANYWHO, I ask out this asian girl that I’ve gone on a few dates with, and we start to date. So we’re going out for about a month, and she’s gone down on me a few times, and all is well, yet every time we get “intimate”, I notice that she WON’T take her shirt of (she says she’s ‘self conscious’), and she WON’T let me do anything to her. Finally I decide to skip the hurdles and go straight for the finish line. Needless to say, I get completely rejected (we’re talking Tyson Chandler rejection). She tells me that, and I quote, she “wants to lose her virginity to the man she’s going to marry”. Keep in mind that she isn’t zealously religious at all. At this point it’s taking every ounce of my spirit to a.) stifle laughter at such a naive statement and b.) resist the urge to get up, walk out, and never return. I assure her that it’s o.k., because it’s not like i’m going to tell her off for not bending to my penis’ will, but this is where the problem lies. Wanting to keep your v-card was understandable in the early years of high school, but WE’RE 19 FUCKING YEARS OLD. I really like this girl, but she’s obviously not the girl I’m going to marry, so I mean what’s the point if not to get through this year together and occasionally fool around? I don’t want to break up with her over something so petty, but is this a legitimate dealbreaker, if her values and mine clash at such a personal level? Or could this be her way of making me work harder for it? This all happened last night, so it’s a bit of an emergency here doc. Any advice/perspective would be awesome.

Sounds to me like she wants a commitment and holding out on vaginal entrance is how she plans to get it. Virgins, both male and female, often have skewed view of the importance of sex. They put it on a pedestal cause they don’t “Get it”. Sure, some stick to their guns after they’ve had it but, in most cases, they realize that sex is fun and why stop yourself from having fun? This same girl may be fucking 4 guys a month within 3 years. You never know.

Also, 19 is pretty young. So it’s understandable that she might still have these values and take this kinda shit very seriously. Sure, most people lose their V-card by then but some girls are gonna wanna hold on to it. In your case, this all depends on how long you wanna wait and how big of a scum bag you wanna be about it.
here are your options as i see them:
1)Tell her you appreciate her honesty and respect her choice but that this isn’t gonna work for you , as you a 19 year old male virgin who doesn’t want to remain a virgin until he’s in love.
2)Lie to her and say everything she wants to hear , date her and shit until she lets you hit it. Then , once you hit it, you can either keep hitting it and getting in deeper into this terrible lie or back off, leaving her feeling like complete shit and regretting every decision she’s ever made. (this is all assuming she actually likes you, which I don’t know if I’m even sold on. This could be one of those situations where she’s just gassing you up, but if the right dude came along, she’d fuck him immediately. You never know)
3)Settle in for the long haul and wife her. You’ll eventually get the sex. I don’t recommend this one at all though, cause you’re 19.

Basically, I’d say you need to break up with her nicely cause you’re head is obviously looking for sex and her head is elsewhere. There will be more pussy in your life. I promise. If you can get one blow job, you can get ten. Be patient. Girls don’t like pushy/desperate virgins. Play it cool and the vagina will find it way to you.

He’s the story. I met this girl at a party few months ago. Didn’t pay any attention to her, even found her stupid (and still do). I was talking to with people and she’s been around for a while, listening to the conversation but not talking much. The thing is that 4 or 5 times she had intense sights to me that I still don’t explain. Didn’t pay much attention to that at the moment, but I noticed.
One thing I have to tell is that the only acquaintane we have in common is pretty much of a douchebag I don’t like.
Few weeks later we met again and that time we talked for hours. She seemed interessed and amused by what I said, and we had lots of interests in common. In fact she didn’t talked that much, but a good listener. I didn’t find her smart or anything but I was drunk and she seemed to like listening to my bullshit.
I had to leave the party and sais bye, at that moment she seemed sad to see me leaving. She looked like a kid seeing his lovy puppy go away, sincerely. That’s when I had that feeling I still don’t explain. Few hours I was thinking of her… a lot !
Sometimes I think I’m a fool and that I misinterpret “signs”… sometimes I think there’s something.
I randomly ran into her in the street few weeks ago. She saw me but acted like she didn’t (brief eye contact and fast head turn, you know what i mean).
I eventually texted her to get some news with no response.
Now here I am, going nowhere, couldn’t be more happy than getting her out of my mind. And I’m pretty sure that if I’d got her, I’d have dumped her.
If only eternal sunshine of the spotless man was not fiction, I’d not write you…

So, what to do ?

You do nothing. Your interest in her is based 100% on conquest and ego due to the fact she kinda blew you off. There was a definite window there and you didn’t take it, so it’s gone now. That doesn’t mean the window is forever shut (perhaps she’s got a man now or something) but who really cares? A girl you kinda sorta wanted to fuck and discard didn’t call you back…get over it.

In a healthy relationship, what percentage of importance would you give to emotional vs. physical attraction? (100% emotional being in the deep friendzone and 100% physical being fuckbuddies)

I think that depends on the couple. I’ve seen couples who are 85% sexually driven who’s relationships are horror movies but they stay together for like 4 years cause the sex keeps them there. At the same time, I’ve seen people who basically become best friends and the sex vanishes but they end up getting married.

I look at this way…sex is important. But actually getting along with the person you’re committed to is even more important. This is a person you have to be able to communicate with, hang out with, joke around with, make life decisions with…The fucking is just one aspect. I’d say anywhere between 70%-60% of it should be friendship. Cause,eventually, the sex is gonna wane and then what do you have? That’s why you see old ass couple shuffling down the street hand in hand. It’s not cause they’re still fucking…it’s cause they’re each others best friends.
It’s also the reason I advise people to stay single for as long as possible. Get all your fucking out of the way so, when it’s tim to settle down, your dick/vagina isn’t clouding your judgement as far as what kinda partner you choose.

Dr. Tony,

This might be a little different from your regular “should I hit it or not?” questions…

I work an office job. I met this girl (Girl 1) at work, and have known her for about 4 years now. I used to consider her a “friend”, even though I kept it strictly work-only. When we met, she let on right away that she was interested, and used to drop hints for me to ask her out. She started to creep me out though, because she seemed really needy, and I could tell that she was stalking me on Myspace, from some conversations we had. So I would always come up with an excuse not to hang out. I never found her even remotely bonerable either. She is about 12 years older than me, one of those holier-than-thou vegetarian, hybrid car types, and overweight. (I know that makes me sound like an asshole, but I usually go for short, thick girls).

2 years after we met… She started dating some guy from work. I was happy that she was off my nuts, and everything was good. One day, on my lunch break, I was pulling through a drive-thru, and I see dude walking into the restaurant with a different girl (Girl 2) from work. They see me, I see them, and I don’t give a shit. I went back to work, and Girl 1 confronts me about it, asking “did you see my boyfriend in the parking lot with Girl 2 at that restaurant?” It turns out, she was spying on them the whole time, hiding in the bushes. She was too ashamed to admit that she was spying, so she wanted to use me as an excuse, in order to call out her boyfriend. I told her “I don’t think so…My visions bad…I can’t see too well”. I didn’t want to get wrapped up in some bullshit with 3 coworkers.

2 years later… She is still dating the same guy. She just got one of her coworkers fired, because he “wasn’t a team player”, and she has been bragging about it. I took that guys old job, because it was a good raise, but now I have to work on a small team with her. Ever since I refused to rat out her boyfriend, she has been a complete bitch. She ignores me if I say “hi”. She refuses to acknowledge most work-related things I say, except to correct me, or call out my mistakes in public, especially in front of Management. She is holding a grudge against me, and I think she will jump at an opportunity to get me fired next.

Blockhead, how do you put bitches in their place? Can I make some sort of peace offering to this animal, or is there a better angle to play?

Man…that sucks. She sounds like a disaster of a person. I’m always very fearful of people who let pettiness dictate their lives.
I think you’ve played everything right thus far. Not snitching about that dude was a good play cause, hey, it’s none of your business.
I think the best thing you can do is play it cool. Kill her with kindness. I’m not saying flirt with her but I’m also saying to soften up your vibe around her. I realize she’s being the irrational cunt here but I’m afriad that’s just how irrational cunts are. Eventually, if your nice enough she’ll have no choice but to at least be somewhat pleasant back.
So, while you’re doing this, you might also wanna collect evidence of her behavior. If she does something unprofessional, write it down. That bragging about getting the dude fired would be a prime example…that’s some fucked up shit and the fact she’s dumb enough to publicly vocalize that she did it leads me to believe she’s a fucking idiot who probably spills all sorts of beans…probably cause she’s insecure, but with power. A dangerous combo if there ever was one.
So, yeah, just watch your own back and create a little file to defend yourself with if that time ever comes. Hell, throwing in her making “advances” at you can’t hurt either. If she’s a shitty as you make her sound, I’m sure other people in the office would have your back.