New video by Illogic and me!

Here’s a new video for the song “Poster boy” off of the “Preparing for capture” EP I did with illogic. If you don’t have it already, go download it…it’s free.
http://illogic.bandcamp.com/album/preparing-for-capture

Also, I’d like to announce that we will be releasing another free EP
“Preparing for capture part 2” on September 4th! Whoop whoop!

Answers for questions vol. 96


I can’t believe I’m almost to volume 100 of this shit. Where have the years gone!?!? Anyway, I’d like to request some new questions. My pile is running low and I need some new stuff to work with…so go nuts. Send them to my email: phatfriendblog@gmail.com or elave them in the comments below. Whatever the case, do it. I need material yo!

If you were required to remove your nose off of your face and place it on a different body part where would you move it to? It cannot be anywhere above the neck and it’s a fully functioning nose.

This question is deep. I keep thinking of places to put my nose but everywhere i do ,it would put it at a great risk of breaking my nose constantly. I thought about putting it on my hand (or the back of of my hand but the idea of wiping my ass made me rethink that plan).
Upon deep consideration, I’d have to go with right on my adams apple. Really but default. It’s a place that doesn’t generally get hit a lot and it’s close enough to the original place that I wouldn’t constantly be overwhelmed by bodily smells. I assume I wouldn’t be the only person alive with their nose there…cause then it might be strange. If that were the case, i’d probably never leave the house so it could be anywhere.

When you get tired of seeing how your cousin is a Jesus freak with glitter unicorns and such on her Facebook page, is it too much to delete her. What if she requests you again? Would it be to soul crushing to ignore it? Could it in fact make her question the almighty Christ and get back on the heroin( she is a recovering addict)?…..Thoughts???

While there would be a strong want to argue with her and try and set her straight, I think we both know that nothing is that simple. She’s that way for a reason. That reason could be cause she’s crazy, lonely and recovering from a heroin addiction…but whatever it is, no snarky facebook comment is gonna make her see the light. My advice? Unsubscribe. It’s the best function facebook has ever made. I’ve unsubscribed to like 75% of the people I’m friends with just cause I didn’t feel like reading their dumb shit all day. Even better, for family and people you don’t really need nosing around in your shit all day, you can set it so certain people don’t get to see your posts in their timeline. They’d only see what you update if they go specifically to your page. That’s a big help. I’m telling you, modifying your facebook makes all the difference in the world. It can be a good place again, I swear.

Here’s one… if you suddenly woke up and lost your hearing, would you still make music ala Beethoven? Or would you move on to something else? I saw a movie a few years back about a DJ who lost his hearing, got depressed but couldn’t shake his love for music (“It’s All Gone Pete Tong”). Or do you love music so much you’d sign a deal with the devil to trade your eyesight for your hearing back?

Oh, if I lost my hearing, I’d be a wrap. I couldn’t make music without my hearing. My entire existence musically is based on a keen ear for melody. I couldn’t even make music if I was tone deaf, let alone full on deaf. I didn’t see that movie but the idea of doing so makes no sense to me. I mean, Beethoven is one thing but a dj? I dunno. Sounds like some bullshit to me.
The sight vs. hearing argument is a tough one. I feel like life would be harder without sight but less fulfilling without hearing. I think I’d have to chose to have sight though cause I need seeing all the time. Not to mention, my dad was almost totally deaf during his later years and he seemed to do alright with it.

Hangover 2 themed question. Waking up for a drunken blackout, would you rather: have a missing finger ( no chance of reattachment) or know you got banged by a tranny hooker (with no memory of it happening)?

I’m the type of person who could live with something like getting banged by a tranny hooker IF (and that’s a big “if”) i didn’t remember it happening. It’s like the whole “if a tree falls in the forest” but with sodomy. Granted, I’d never want that to happen ever but it it’s between that and losing a body part, I’m taking that. I’ve had a prostate exam and I’d just imagine the after effects of being fucked in the ass (and not remembering it) would be similar. Sit lightly.

Even though some might say “but it’s only a finger!” and on paper that’s valid…but in reality, not having a finger would be the worst. You ever bruise a part of your hand badly? For as long as that bruise is there, you then realize how often things bang up against your hands without you noticing. I’d Imagine losing a finger would be that times a billion. Sure, it would eventually heal but the initial pain in the ass-ness of it would be enough for me to easily choose the forgotten tranny romp…but only cause it was forgotten.

Sports:

I hear these arguments a lot. 

Which sport has the best athletes? Why?

I’m biased here but I gotta go with basketball. I say this cause it takes all the facets of athleticism. Power, speed, agility, hand eye coordination, finesse. Other sports rival it but the ability to be graceful within the structure of a totally contact sport is what puts it over the top for me.
Well, that or Nascar. Obviously.

Which championship is harder to earn (professionally and collegiately) and why?

Shit, I dunno. I’d imagine they all are insanely hard to to earn. When I think of casual sports i’ve played over the years and the lengths people would go to to win those, a game that means nothing, it’s crazy to imagine how intense and next level the vibe would be when something of worth is actually on the line.
When I think about it though, I might have to go with a sport you do alone. Like golf or tennis. In those sports, it’s 100% you. There’s no one to bail out out and that element of physical and mental strength might be the hardest to synch up.

Which city has the best sports fans? Which city has the worst?

Well, there are two ways to look at this: By best and worst, you could mean in the way they support their teams. In that case, I’d say the smaller town teams are the best. Those motherfuckers come out in droves to support teams that 99/100 times will never do shit. Hell, think of how popular high school football is in the south. I’d say, in many cases, the less you got to live for, the bigger a local fan you’re gonna be.
I got mad respect for the people who come out for their shitty teams. Like the Golden state warriors. They’ve sucked forever but that stadium is rocking at every home game.
Looking at it this way, I’d say Floridians are some of the worst fans ever as they don’t evencome out for winning teams. That blows my mind.
The other way to look at it would be to equate “worst” with most annoying. In this case, all fans that aren’t fans of the team you’re a fan of are the worst. I hate boston fans. I’m from NYC. It’s a given. They hate me. That’s how this thing works.

Song of the day 7/27/12


Four Walls By Eddie Holman
http://www.sharebeast.com/su38p6i072wz

I’m pretty sure this was probably one of the first “song of the day” songs I ever posted and with good reason. It’s probably one of my all time favorite songs. I’m also pretty sure that link has been dead for years as Zshare tends to work like that. i figured it would be cool to repost this cause , for one, it’s an amazing song and , secondly, there’s more of a story to it since the last time I posted it.

Around the time I was making “The Music Scene” album, I was deeply obsessed with this song. I didn’t want to sample it cause that tends to ruin songs for me (it’s overkill from a listening perspective) but I wanted to somehow incorporate it. I had the idea of doing a cover of it. Thing is, while I know some singers, I didn’t want to simply try and have some person sing it all normally over a beat. It needed to be different in order for it to not only make it work within the context of the album, but also not ruin the original song for me as a fan.

So, after some consideration, I hollered at my boy Wilder Zoby , of the group Chin Chin. I knew he was nice with the vocoder and a vocoder version of “four walls” would be exactly the right move. Not only would it sound cool but it also would fit perfectly into the theme of “The music scene”. At the time, Autotune was huge in pop music. You couldn’t turn on the tv or radio without hearing some non-singer singing via a computer program. Seeing as my album was somewhat to an ode to how shitty the music scene had gotten, it was a perfect plan to throw on a song using a vocoder (something EXTREMELY different than Autotune but, to the average ear, fairly similar). I knew, once that song was up , some people (shitty music critics and youtube commenters)would jump all over it on some “I can’t believe blockhead is doing a song with autotune!”. That idea was funny to me so that fueled the fire of wanting to get the song done.
So, it happened. Wilder Came in a knocked it out the park. The result was this:

A song that didn’t ruin the original in my eyes , but still works on it’s own. Is it better? Fuck no. But at least its different. Oh and I also got great satisfaction from the times people did diss the song for me trend hopping auto-tune. SUCCESS.

I am so confused


Okay, I think I’ve reached my limit. I can no longer discern what is real and what is parody on the internet. It seems like it’s something that , with just the tiniest bit of reasonable thought, would be easy to figure out…but no. I saw something just now that was pretty much the straw that broke the camels back.
Allow me to introduce you to Pinkletank

Wait…what? So, this is the first thing I saw about them and I was leaning towards it being a joke. I mean, it could be some Tim and Eric shit starring two kids with downs syndrome. That would make sense and bring order to the world…but no. There’s more.


First off, that’s an ILL truck stop stage. Secondly, I have no idea what’s going on in the clip. Is this guerilla marketing? And, again, downs syndrome?

I guess they hate rap…or do they? I CAN’T FUCKING TELL ANYTHING ANYMORE.


So this video was the first one to kinda let me inside to what’s really going on. Gauging from this, the kids is actually just deeply southern and does not have Downs syndrome (a common mistake I’m sure tons of people make when evaluating deeply southern people). His name is “Tank” which leads me to believe his sister’s name is “Pinkle”. Obviously, he’s the mind behind the music. He’s the composer and he’s the one banging out the hot jams.

And , finally, the unforgettable cover of everyone’s favorite Adele song

So, my final synopsis is that Pinkletank is real. So real. So, either they have the most delusional parents on earth or the meanest parents on earth. That’s really the question for the ages though so there’s no way I could ever answer that with any certainty.

Instagram: An overview


Like with most social networks, I’m always about 2 years behind. It happened with friendster, it happened with Myspace, It happened with Facebook and it happened with Twitter. After years of wondering “why the fuck do people care about Instagram?” I joined. Well, to be honest, I didn’t intend to really join. I signed up so I could look at a picture that i wanted to see that i couldn’t see anywhere else. Little did I know that, by signing up, it would alert all my facebook friends and twitter followers that I had joined. So, I signed up, took a piss and came back to see i had like 50 followers in 15 seconds. After about an hour I had a few hundred and figured , since I’m not one to half ass my social networking, I know had an instagram (follow me @blockheadnyc).

Here’s the thing, I’ve never been a person who took pics with my phone. Up until last year I had phones that’s photo capabilities were about on par with coal cave drawings. But, beyond that, I never really gave a shit about taking pics. Back in the day, I used to have a camera with me when I went out cause I liked capturing drunk debauchery and hot girls but that was about that. Now , all of a sudden I’m faced with filters and people being all artsy and shit. Word to dwayne wayne, It’s a different world.

So, within a few days, i pretty much figured out the law of the land with instagram. Much like other social networks, it’s easy to see where people stand right away with instagram. Right off the bat, I got accustomed to the “go to” pics of isntagram. And by “go to” I mean “completely played out shit that 95% of the people on instagram post all the fucking time”. Things like:

SUNSETS

Oh, sunsets, no two are alike yet all of them ever are exactly alike. It’s funny how that works. I get people wanna show each other the breathtaking beauty of mother natures glory that they’re witnessing in person but , much like pictures of nature that people take on vacations, NO ONE CARES. Seriously, unless there’s a tornado with a DNA ladder like rotation of flailing cows whipping around it, I never need to see a picture of the sky again. I think I speak for most people when I say “WE GET IT”. Basically, sunset pics are the photo equivalent to telling another person about the dream you had last night.

FOOD

As someone who loves food and watches multiple TV shows about food, I get where you guys are coming from. I’ve certainly sat down with a delicious meal in front of me and thought “Man,I wish other people could see what I’m about to eat”. But the food pics on instagram are beyond out of control. From what i’ve seen, this is primarily a girl thing. For some reason, girls love taking pictures of food the most. I don’t know if it’s some weird guilty thing about over eating or the complete opposite where they want to brag to their dieting friends about all the awesome stuff the pile down their throats. Or perhaps (and most likely) it’s just that girls enjoy taking pics of visually pleasing things. Either way, it’s fucking corny.
On a deeper level, food pics don’t bug me that much cause, like i said, I love food. But if you can’t sit down at a table without needing to immortalize your soon to be fecal matter, then you have a problem. As someone with a highly food based lifestyle, even I have been tempted to snap a shot of my meals here and there. But I found a good way to get around it…taking pics of the food in my mouth.

I think the eating action shots are the way to go with food photography. Who needs to look at some old boring plate when you can just stuff the food inside you mouth and , not only get the short of the food, but also a reaction shot by an actual human face.

BABIES

Listen, I’m not a monster. Babies are adorable. This is one aspect, coming from the Facebook world, that I fully expected to see endlessly on instagram. Now, Perhaps it’s just who I follow but this actually hasn’t been that bad. I’d say Facebook is way worse. The thing is, instagram is actually perfect for baby pics cause it’s just one pic at a time. You gotta choose your best shot and roll with it. Unlike facebook where it’s photo album upon photo album, as parents are just chronicling ever waking moment of their child’s life for their entire friend population. From their close family members to that person they fucked once 8 years ago, friended while drunk and forgot about. So, in this case, I actually support your baby pics. Unless you got an ugly kid, in which case, UNFOLLOWED.

YOUR FUCKING PETS

Aww…look at your cat! he’s not like other cats! He’s special. and maaaaaan, look at your dog! He’s like a person! He eats food just like we do and breaths!
As someone who has not a morsel of interest in your pets (or pets in general), this kinda shit is the bane of my instagram existence. From what I’ve been told and explained a billion times, apparently, humans are very fond of their animals. They love their dogs and their cats…often more than actual people. While I think this all pretty ridiculous, I also (admittedly) might not have a soul.
Even with this complete disinterest I have for pets, even I can differentiate a cute animal pic from a “I’m bored in me bed , watching tv with my cat” animal pic. The latter, much like sunsets, are all the same. Every pic you take of your cat look exactly the same. Perhaps if you put a handkerchief around his neck and put a tiny cowboy hat on him, then it’s photo worthy. Otherwise , you’re just being that typical self indulgent instagrammer that most people secretly resent. You’re also probably a cat person which is almost unforgivable.

ARTSY CRAP

Much like downloadable musical equipment has given birth to a generation of talentless musicians who think they can do something simply because they’re allowed to, instagram has done the exact same thing for budding photographers. I understand the urge to artsy up your photos. Some of those filters really can make the most average picture look at least interesting. But you fuckers that go around posting out of focus , grainy pics of….well, i have no idea what they are cause they’re out of focus and grainy…You guys need to fall back. You’re not an artist. You’re just another asshole, just like me and everyone else on earth, with a camera on your phone. Point and shoot, bro.

THE AIRPLANE WINDOW SHOT

Ughh. Who hasn’t looked out an airplane window and thought “This would be an awesome picture” only to think about it for two seconds and realize “actually, no it wouldn’t be”. Much like sunsets, they are all the same and always boring. Trip pictures are bad enough but no one needs to see the “how you got there” part. Unless there’s a monster on the wing, don’t ever take an airplane window pic.

Now, while all those things make a dude want to never open the App again, there are obviously reasons why Instagram is awesome.
1)Funny pics
This could be anything from a funny pic off the internet to a random funny image caught in real life. In reality, THIS is what makes instagram great to me.

2)drunk party pics
Randomly snapping shots at random moments in random drunken nights have resulted in some fantastic pictures that are no only hilarious but will always remind those involved of that night.

3)girls in swim wear pics
Duh. Creeping is a major part of instagram. If you went to the beach, trust me that every dude that follows you would like to see how that went. Even those dumb, POV shots where you only see your legs and the fruity drink you’re drinking. It’s better than nothing.

4)scandalous pics
I don’t think I need to explain this one. As long as no one reports you, it’s all good.

5)Pics capturing some sort of achievement that needs to be announced/crucial life updates
Things like graduations, wedding, new baby, catching a big fish, killing your first hobo, ect…

6)throwback thursdays
Pics of you when you were a young fucking dork. They’re the best.

7)weird shit seen in public places
This could be grouped with the funny stuff but , sometimes it’s just weird and not funny.

8)”cool” stuff.
This could really be anything. A weird car, a strange painting, an unusual street sign, anything retro that isn’t played out. While people who only take pics of shit like this can be kinda boring to follow, they do find some pretty awesome stuff so i can’t really be mad.

I think that’s about it…I’m sure i forgot some things but, instagram is down at the moment so I can’t double check. That’s a problem.

Oh, a just a quick list of instagram peeves:
writing #nofilter is fucking corny. stop doing that. No ones impressed by your mastery of phone photos.

Private profiles…I get that you want your privacy but if you follow me, I should be able to see your shit.

People who don’t have a single pic of themselves.
Listen, much like the private profile, you’re throwing salt on the game of all people who just wanna creep around a look at stuff. That stuff, often being a person of the opposite sex. Trust me when i say, in general, it’s just harmless curiosity. Let a person see what they’re dealing with…