Answers for questions vol. 97



Hi everyone. Not that you care but this construction outside my window is now about 3 months in and I don’t think I’ve slept more than 6 hours a night that entire time. It’s sooooooo awesome.
I can feel my transformation into a morning person and , lemme tell you, fuck mornings. Nothing good happens before noon not called “bacon”.
Anyway, I need more questions! Send them my way! Make them fun! interesting! Email me them at: phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments below. I’d also ask that, if someone does leave a question in the comments below, can other readers please refrain from throwing in their two cents? I don’t mind you guys chiming in when the question has already been answered by me but answering it before me kinda defeats the purpose.

Would you rather eat a cookie that tasted exactly as shit would taste, but is still for all intents and purposes a cookie, or a piece of shit of equivalent size that tastes exactly like a cookie?

Depends. Would the piece of delicious shit look like a cookie or look like a shit? Would my body react to the tasty shit chip as it was shit or would it digest it like it were a tasty baked good? Basically, I’d go with whatever didn’t make me sick afterwards. I’ve eaten shrooms enough to know what shit tastes like and , while it’s no fun, it’s doable.
More importantly, I’d be very curious of the source of that cookie tasting shit. I’d assume it’s a girl cause , as we all know, girls shit smell like flowers.

Blockhead Radio
To start things off, we’ll play a song that exemplifies the musical style of Blockhead which features electronica roots, beats made for dancing, straight drum beats, a rhythmic intro and use of modal harmonies.

^That’s pandoras description of Which One of You Jerks Drank My Arnold Palmer

I mention this because I’ve always been curious to how that name came about. Please tell me it was just because an unknown jerk drank your arnold palmer, my pothead friend insists its a clever expose of something.

I wish I could say there’s a story behind it but it was more just a train of thought thing. I was sitting there, mixing the song (that was unnamed at that point) and the name came to me. I just felt like the beat had a very summer-y vibe. I had been drinking lots of arnold palmers that summer and , for some reason, the song made me think of that , plus a robbery. And, viola, there was the title.
In general, I tend to name things whatever pops into my head. There’s almost never a deeper meaning behind the song titles. Sometimes, I’ll get stuck on a song title and eventually just sit there listening to the done song thinking “what does this sound like?” and then just taking whatever that is and obscuring it to some random detail that can work as a song title. It’s either that or inside jokes.m

Seeings how you have toured around in a van or bus a few times, have you been through every US state at least once? Which states haven’t you been to yet? Did any states surprise you with an eclectic selection of bonerable women?

The thing I hate most about traveling is public restrooms because they are disgusting. Which state has the worst public restrooms, and why? Don’t worry about anyone’s feelings here, go ahead and call them suckers out.

Okay…lots of questions…lemme try and answer them one at a time.

I’d say I’ve at least driven through every state (except alaska and Hawaii). There’s a chance I haven’t been through one of the Dakota’s (probably north) but beyond that, I’ve been within them all.
As for bonerable women, I can honestly say that there are hot girls everywhere. That said, the further you go into the center of the country the less frequent they are. Obviously, a place like chicago is chock full of girls and cities in ohio and michigan will shock you with some of the hidden jewels they have. Sometimes those local hot girls are the best cause they haven’t even fully realized how hot they are yet. They’ve been living in the burbs ,fucking losers in the back of pick up trucks their entire life and don’t fully understand the power they could have. It’s like when you see some random girl on the internet who’s insanely hot and then see pics of her with her local boyfriend. Dude hit the jackpot and she doesn’t even realize it.
However , as far as I’ve seen, outside the cities can be somewhat of a wasteland. Like the places between where I would be performing shows. Those types of places where you start to see the effects of fast food everywhere. People are definitely fatter in the middle of the country…they also have kids a lot younger (which probably doesn’t help). As for a state that surprised me, I’ll just say a city instead. Detroit had some shockingly hot girls in it. Both there and girls I’ve met from that area. Who knew it was such a prosperous breeding ground for hot girls?

Now, the worst restroom thing is tough. I can’t definitively say one state has the worst bathrooms in general. It’s more just a case of where in a state the toilet is. If it’s a bathroom mostly inhabited by truck drivers, it’s gonna be horrific. I dunno why but those motherfuckers are animals when it comes to how they treat a bathroom. Maybe it’s all the drugs they’re on but their relationship with shitting is unhealthy. The grossest bathroom I ever saw was while on tour with Aesop about 4 years ago. We stopped in some truck stop somewhere between Colorado and Utah. The bathroom has it’s own separate building that was just two little rooms. I was first on line and went in , only to be greeted by a toilet with so much unflushed shit in it, the shit was higher than the toilet seat. Like a slightly melted ice cream cone. It was the type of thing that meant, at some point, more than a few people opted to stand over this full bowl of shit and just add to the pile.
I took one look and turned around. I had to pee but I wasn’t going anywhere near that fecal mountain. I left and just waited by the door as i watched people walk in, and then run out. It was actually pretty hilarious. Until that one dude went in who was obviously like “Fuck it”, and he did his thing in there. I don’t know whether that guy is gangster or just a disgusting human being. Probably a little of both.

As a hardcore Nets fan I’m always curious to hear your (Knick fan) thoughts on both teams’ recent happenings. The hot topic of late has been whether it’s permissible for long-time Knicks fans, especially those from Brooklyn, to jump ship now that there’s another team in the city. I’m not sure if El-P was ever a big Knicks fan (though I would have assumed so), but he’s been seen rockin the new gear, as has Busta and many other notable or not so notable rappers/celebrities. What’s your take? Is it okay to say “enough with this James Dolan bullshit”, become a Nets fan and never look back? Should Knicks fans tough it out (especially since nothing is assured with a capped-out Nets either)? Is it at all possible to root for both teams, or is that just a pussy solution?

I think people can root for whoever they want. I’ve never been a dude who loves one local team but hates the other. I have my preferences but, when it comes down to it, they’re both my local teams. Obviously, I’d rather the Knicks be the better team cause i have more history with them but if the Nets are dope, that’s cool too. Shit, when the nets were good in the jason kidd era, i was rooting them on in the playoffs.
I’ve seen tons of BK Nets gear around and I kinda think it has more to do with the design than the team. I know El doesn’t watch sports so I gotta think the black and white simplicity of the design and the fact he’s from BK played into that.
The only downside i see is that there are gonna be a lot of hipster dipshits who moved to brooklyn 3 years ago wearing those shirts like it’s their city they’re representing. That’s fine and dandy but I just know there will be an added layer of smugness to it with some of those kids. I think they can go fuck themselves and should be rooting for whatever shitty team they grew up near.

Do you run into a lot of white kids that throw the word nigga around like it’s nothing? And if so, whats your take on white kid’s using that word so freely nowadays?

I’m 35. The only time i see white kids saying “Nigga” is when I’m playing ball at the park and I’m around teenagers. And then, it’s a white kid saying it to his puerto rican friend who’s sitting next to his black friend. These kids truly don’t care and their relationship to the word is something completely different than my relationship with it is. Honestly, I don’t give a fuck who says it. As long as the intention isn’t a negative one, then it is what it is. I wouldn’t personally say it but, like I said, I’m older. I was around when it was unheard of for a white kid to even think of using that word. But beyond anything, it’s not my place to say who can and who cannot say that word. That’s really on black people. If they’re offended by some white teenager calling his white friend “my nigga”, that’s totally understandable. I support their right to not like that. And any white who says that word should also respect that , if they’re gonna use that word, there are people out there who with justifiably be offended by it.
But , me personally? I don’t give a shit. I don’t even blink when I hear that word coming out of anyone’s mouth unless there’s a hard “r” at the end. I’m not really the type of person who gets offended on behalf of another person in situations like that. Unless it’s obvious racism, it’s just a word to me.

Would you rather get pounded in the ass by a girl wielding a strap-on or get pounded in the ass by a guy, also via strap-on? Keep in mind the dude has his weiner taped back so it isn’t slapping into your balls or anything like that.

Does it really matter? In both cases, it would be a rape. It would hurt and I’d hate every second of it. I suppose the guy would be more powerful and , therefor, more violent but , at the same time, the last thing I want would be for someone to make love to me with a strap on. Basically, I’d pick whoever finished quickest.

6 thoughts on “Answers for questions vol. 97

  1. waz going on blockhead, just wondering if u could check out my Ep i just recently dropped a couple days agooooo called Drown. I would appreciate a review from you fam , ive been a fan of yours for a min ….P E A C E.

    • Sorry, I don’t peep people’s demo’s unless I have to. Nothing personal. I do a “demo review” thing here but only take demo’s that were sent when I asked for them.

  2. Seeing as (depending on your early life drug use) you probably remember the 90’s pretty well, how do you think the internet and flash culture (people knowing things in 10 seconds, internet sensations, etc) has affected humor? Was humor better before the internet? Was the world a less annoying place when everybody wasn’t so focused on being ironic and super sarcastic?

  3. A little back you posted a killer track by “Gull”. I think it was called “Fast Enough”. Essentially the guy put on a kick ass one-man band show in that video! Is there any chance that you’ll hit this guy up for a collab or something like that. I was listening to some of your work with The Mighty Jones, and I fell in love with it the minute Joanna’s voice collided with your beats (I’ve been playing my microkorg over “The Spell” for the past few days now, it’s very inspirational). I know Gull’s music is pretty different from most of the artists you’ve been working with, but could you see a possible collab with this guy? I could easily hear some “Expiration Date” style drums over some of his tracks. I know you’ve got a decent amount of work on your plate at the moment, but I think you should hit the guy up in your free time. I think it would be an exciting project.

    • I actually don’t know the dude personally. I could see how it would work sonically but I have a feeling he doesn’t really need me…after all, he is a one man band.

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