Answers for questions vol. 109


What up everyone. I’m glad last week is over and I hope people are starting to get their lives back together out here on the east coast. Not to sound like an OCD lunatic but last week was the first week since i started this blog where I didn’t post at least 4 times in a week. So, I’m happy that I should be getting back to the regular flow of things once again this week.
As always, I’d love you ask me questions. Be creative. Be fun. Don’t be boring.
Send them to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments below. And now, on with the show…

You get to go on an episode of Trading Spaces with a music professional of your choice. It can be literally any rapper, producer, musician, singer, whatever. As is customary on Trading Spaces, you basically get total creative freedom to redecorate their home in however you see fit. You could just be a nice guy and do something cool, but fuck that, you’ve got like 3 days to do whatever you want and there’s a lot of people out there who would be fun to fuck with. For the sake of this stupid question, let’s say they’ve gotta live with it for at least a year.

You can paint their bedroom black, board up their windows and spray paint glow in the dark dicks all over the walls if you want. You can replace their kitchen faucets with dildos. You could be scary as all hell and turn their bathroom into the set of Saw. Whatever you want to do, you get to do it.

That said, it’s a pretty dangerous situation because they also get to redecorate your place and you’ll have to live with it for a year. You might want to play this one defensively. For example, you probably wouldn’t wanna pick Kanye, because though it would be fun to make a fuckery of his pad, he’d most likely just paint floor to ceiling murals of his naked self covered in gold chains and being groped by freaky bird-women all over your apartment, so chose wisely. I feel like DOOM would just get high and glue comic books to everything, which might be kinda cool. Anyway, get creative.

I’m not a man of interior design. I truly don’t care what my house looks like, as long as my necessities are inside it. Prior to my girl moving in, my living situation has been one of an organized mess. It wasn’t like I was a hoarder or anything but you also probably wouldn’t want to walk into my bathroom with bare feet. Everything was set up out of convenience. It was the most logical house ever, yet it looked like the fucking little rascals clubhouse.
That said, i truly don’t know what I’d do here. As long as the other artist doesn’t fuck with my belongings, he/she could paint my crib bright pink (if i traded spaces with Cam’ron perhaps?)and put dildo’s on the wall and you’d be shocked how long it would take me to change that. My indifference toward this kind of thing if legendary. So I’d probably pick someone who wanted to simply upgrade my shit and not expect much on my end. That person? Beyonce. I would certainly let her upgrade me.


Do all men really cheat? Are there any faithful guys left on this Earth? (I’m by no means disputing the fact that female slut bags cheat as well. But I’m a faithful woman so I’m allowed to ask this question.)

Of course not. Many do, but not all of them by a long shot. The way I see it there are like 5 basic types of men in this respect.
1)Dudes that will always cheat
These are guys who truly don’t give a fuck. It’s not just cause they’re selfish but often, it’s not even a moral question to them. they feel, it’s their duty as men to just fuck whoever they want. The don’t feel guilt and they do it with the reserve of a serial killer. The don’t get caught much either cause they’re comfort in doing it is such that it’s like second nature. These are the guys who have like one ride or die girl who they’re shacked up with (possibly with kids) and like 6 other girls they fuck on the regular. I feel as if any girl who not a delusional moron would be able to see through one of these dudes but you’d be shocked how often they don’t.

2)Dudes that don’t seek it out, but are susceptible to it
These are guys who, in general, are good people but have a few moral chinks in their armor. Dudes who don’t go looking for trouble but have problems turning it down when faced with it. Usually, these are people who are bad at drinking and drunk decision making or guys with little self control in general. They also might be the type to reluctantly get caught up in some office romance that turns into a full blown affair. These are dudes who can be preyed on my aggressive women who don’t give a shit about what they’re relationship status is. These guys are often only as faithful as their options are so be careful.

3)Dudes that will 90% of the time never cheat
These are guys who only go there in extreme circumstances. If they’re relationship is going well, it’s a non-issue and they follow a code. But , if things at home are strained and the right opportunity comes around, the MIGHT make a mistake. Usually a one time thing that they’d end up telling their significant other out of overwhelming guilt. So, on the bright side, they’re human and recognize they’re errors but , at the same time, yo can never be 100% sure of them.

4)Dude who don’t cheat but fantasize about it all the time
These are guys with a clear moral code that go out of their way to stay out of trouble. However, not a day goes by when they don’t think about it. They realize the right and wrong of the situation but the temptation is still there. I liken them to people who quit doing cocaine 15 years ago who still have dreams about it. It’s always looming in the background but these guys have enough self control to keep it under wraps. Instead, they get great pleasure out of harmlessly flirting with girls at social events and then walking away with their tail tucked between their legs.

5)Dudes who wouldn’t even think of such a thing
These are the ride or die dudes who basically just shut down all access to the opposite sex. To them, women that aren’t their significant other are just men with nicer clothes. Their dick is locked down and they don’t care in the least bit. To be honest, I’ve met a few of these types and they’re kinda scary in their dedication. It’s admirable but I can’t help but think they’re kind of crazy or full of shit. But, it turns out, they do actually exist.

Of these five types, I’d say the majority of men fall in the #3-4 range. There are TONS of #1 types (the % of athletes and musicians like that is staggering) and not THAT many #5 types but I’d say most even out. So, yeah, not all men cheat. But lots of them do.

What’s your opinion on polyamory? Do you think that 3 people all being in a relationship with each other can work?

I actually wrote something about this a while back when “big love” was still on:
https://phatfriend.com/2010/01/14/polygamy/
Giving the link to that is the lazy answer but I repeat myself enough on here.

If you could choose to stay any age forever, what age would it be and why?
That’s tough. It depends if it means i would be as dumb as i was back then or I’d age in intelligence but stay the same age physically.
It it’s the former, I’d like to be around 26/27. I was smart enough at that point and started to figure things out. Financially, I wasn’t killing it yet but I was doing okay. I went out all the time, hooked up with tons of girls and had a nice core group of friends who did the same. I’d say that was the most fun era of my life. Not the most productive, but most fun.
If it’s the former, I’d go even younger. If I could be 21 and know all the shit I know now…man…I’d die of syphilis within the first year AND IT WOULD BE WORTH IT!

If you could choose anyone, who would you pick to be your mentor and why?

Hmm..i’ve never been one for Mentors. I’m a terrible student so that quality hasn’t leant itself to me being mentored by anyone. When i was 11/12, there was this toy store I used to frequent and this dude Manny used to work there. I went in there initially to
buy toys and video games but eventually Manny and I bonded over rap music. He was like 19 and knew everything. He was the closest thing to an idol I ever had as he pretty much put me on to all the music I now consider some of my favorite shit ever. Without him, I probably wouldn’t have ever even fell in love with hip hop the way i did. That was as close to a mentor as I ever had. Nowadays I can’t see my 36 year old ass being mentored by anyone unless I took up glass blowing or got a real job…and that’s not happening if I can help it. So, yeah, I got no answer for this one. It’s kinda like the question “What inspires you?”. I really don’t know but i also never think about that kinda stuff.

Have you ever had a girl queef while you were boning her? If so, explain the story and how you felt.

Are you a 14 year old virgin? Of course I have. What adult male hasn’t? More times than I can remember. In fact, I tend to assist in getting the air out if i can feel it there. Queef’s are not a big deal. It’s just air. The fact it makes a fart sound is comical but if you’re an adult with any reasonable amount of sexual experience, you just plow right through it like nothing happened. If you’re still reacting to queef’s in bed you clearly ain’t about that life.

Out of all the places you’ve traveled, what’s your favorite country/city and why?

Well, NYC is my favorite city by far but that’s not the question…we’re talking where I’ve traveled. That’s tough cause , while I’ve traveled all over, it’s rare that I’ve been able to spend that much time in one place. Certainly not enough to have an opinion on it as “the best”. That said, in the states, I’d say San Francisco is my favorite city not named New York. Outside the states, I LOVED Melbourne, Australia. I got to spend 4 days there a long time a go and it was awesome. The vibe, the people and the city in general.
It’s funny that I get to travel and see all these places cause, really, I’m not a very adventurous guy. In fact, I hate traveling. but I’d imagine , had i been given like 5 days at every place I’ve ever been to, I’d like it more. The one thing I know about going places is that it’s often not the place, but who you’re with. I’m sure I could have a great time in the Ozarks if i was with the right people.

12 thoughts on “Answers for questions vol. 109

  1. Do you remember having a favorite teacher in any grade, if so why?

    What are your thoughts concerning hip-hop production styles of today compared with the production styles of the early 90’s?

    How has your outlook changed on life from 5, 10, 15 years ago?

  2. dear blockhead, if you had 24 hours to live what would you? besides listening to that shitty mase song.

    whens the last time you got into a fight? you ever really gotten your assed kicked or kicked some else’s bad? who do you think is the toughest dude in hip-hop? like if they had a BLOOD SPORT tournament who would win?

  3. If you could live in any year in the United States history for a month out of your life, what year would it be, where would it be, and why that year? If you selected 1966, would you go with your smartphone and pretend to be all CIA style, (given that your smartphone would work during that time). Would you be like a Nastradamus type telling tales of the future?

  4. I found this website looking up stuff about 2 live crew and all I wanna know is if those women on your banner know they are on there lol.

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