Answers for questions vol. 164


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Whattup everyone,
I hope your thanksgiving was as good as mine. Mine was boring as fuck and spent in the suburbs of Maryland so , there’s a good chance you got me beat pretty easily.
So, this is that thing where I answer questions sent in by readers. I always need more questions so please send me more…In fact, I order you! Send me questions! Email them to me at Phatfriendblog@gmail.com or, if you’re too lazy for that shit, just leave them in the comments below. It’s all anonymous so feel free to get as weird as you can. I’ll answer pretty much anything within reason.
This weeks batch is a real soul searcher. Come take a dip with me into my inner minds third eye of enlightenment. Just kidding…Fuck all that noise.
Anyway, here’s this weeks batch of goodies…

What movie has made the biggest impact on you?

Impact? I mean, as far as how it molded my life, it’s hard to say. I don’t really ever feel that moved one way or another by movies. I love them but it’s not like I’ve watched one and it changed how I approach living my life. SO, in a way, I’d say the comedies of the late 80’s and early 90’s probably shaped me the most. I suppose that’s the foundation of many parts of my personality. Shit like Police Academy, Airplane!, and Caddyshack.
On a different tip, the film that moved me the most was one I saw recently. It is a documentary called “The act of killing” and it is truly horrifying (in the best way possible).

Extremely heavy and moving movie. When the movie ended, everyone in the theater just sat there in silence well past the normal time people would be gathering their stuff and leaving. Then, when I went outside, no one was saying anything. Everyone was just kinda looking at each other with dazed and distressed looks on their faces. If you like documentaries about the emotional consequences of years of brutal ethnic cleansing, this will be you kinda movie.

Best advice you’ve ever received?

I’ve never been one to heed that much advice. I’ve also never been one to be given that much advice. I don’t know why that is but, in general, not many people really try and give me any. At least, not in a “life time philosophy” kinda way. The things I’ve learned have been by just paying attention to people around me. I’m an observant learner. I was never one for direct lessons being forced on me.
One thing that stuck with was something my dad said when I was 16. I was at the dinner table with him , my brother , my mom and this girl I was dating. I was on some deep puppy love shit and she was, let’s just say, not as committed to the relationship as I was. Basically, it was a summer fling for her and I was ready to go half on a baby. So, we were eating and my dad must have noticed the look in my eyes. Honestly, I don’t know what he saw cause he was very old and basically deaf at that point but he picked up on something. The next day, he mentioned her to me and I perked up. He then just said to me “Don’t get too wrapped up in that one. She thinks she knows what’s going on but she has no idea”.
Now his intention was probably not to give me life advice and more to steer me away from heartbreak. However, for some reason, that statement stuck with me over the years and taught me that, in many cases, we will play someone up in our head based on our own expectations and ignore the glaring realities of that person. I’m certain that wasn’t his intent but that’s what i got out of it. That was an important life lesson that kinda happened by accident. I’ve definitely applied that to many people over the years and it’s come in handy when trying to understand the way people present themselves versus how they really are internally.

Do you ever think about growing old and being old? My dad’s 87, he’s healthy but he’s super difficult and annoying haha.. do you think you’re personality will change much? think you’ll be the same person?

I mean, all the time but more in the sense of “Man, it’s gonna be hard to play basketball in 10 years”. I don’t think about being really old though. I’d rather just ignore it. It’s depressing enough closing in on 40. Despite what people may sell you, getting old isn’t fun. More responsibilities, everything is more difficult physically,and life is less fun in general…but what you get in exchange is a peace of mind that you simply cannot have as a young person. So, in a way, that’s nice.
But personally, the idea of my body beginning to fail me is the worst. Aside from whatever illnesses I have in store for me, just the wear and tear of living is a depressing thing. I’ve thrown my back out sneezing. Putting on my socks is legit hard for me nowadays. I get fucked up by eating certain unhealthy foods. My hangovers feel like full blown AIDS. I’m pretty much just waiting around for my bowel movements to get a mind of their own and throw in the towel.
As for me being the same person and how I will change, I’d like to think I will be a wiser version of the person I am now.. I mean, you evolve as you get older but I don’t see myself going through some dramatic life change that causes me to be a different person. I’ve never been that type to just switch up and change everything. I’ve been a pretty consistent person my whole life. Most likely, I’ll just be crankier and more pessimistic. So, have fun with that one, friends and family!
I’ve always said that, once I reach the point where I can no longer wipe my ass, just put me in a wheel chair and roll me off a bridge. Trust me, I will have lived all the life I could have lived and , at the least, I’d be going out with some dignity.

Yo Block, I’m a Laker fan and I was wondering why you hate Kobe so much? Oh, and don’t give me any of that infidelity bullshit cause EVERYONE in the NBA is a cheating asshole to some degree. So yeah, what’s your take on the Mamba?

I could care less about his infidelity. In fact, judging professional athletes based on that would be like hating on birds cause they can fly. THEY ALL CHEAT. He got caught. I’m not his wife, why would I give a shit what he does off the court?
But , why do I hate kobe? Cause he’s a dick. He’s an amazingly skilled asshole. There is no denying that he’s one of the greatest players ever. No one is taking that away from him. And, because of that, I can see why lakers fans love him. He’s your guy. But he’s a conceited , selfish prick who no one that plays with ever likes. Is that not enough reason for me to not like him?
The thing about basketball players and how I perceive them is that I relate it to my own experiences. Anyone who plays ball gets well acquainted with all sorts of different personalities. Like, on my level, I’ve played with people who’s style of play and attitude (not to be confused with skill level, which is totally something else) are comparable to someone like Kobe. Watching him play, I know that guy. He’s an asshole. He’s a guy who is obviously amazing but I wouldn’t wanna be on his team cause I know that would entail him barking orders at me , rolling his eyes when I make mistakes and never passing. On the same note, watching a guy like Durant, he’s likable. The dude is next level talented but still manages to not be a dick about it. Kobe is not that guy. I bet Kobe jerks off into the mirror while his failed rap album plays in the background. He’s that kinda asshole. Fuck him.

In The questions you answered today (11/11) you said youd not be into
dating anorexics Or bulemics Cause you dont want to date a skinny girl
Or a fatty. Im just curious with The constant media attention on The
female form, what men actually think is “too fat” – especially since
The average Size of American women is constantly changing.
Also, what are your thoughts on The media backlash on “skinny” and How
media images of beauty shape What men find attractive? Do most men
think women in The media are something Other women should aspire to in
terms of their weight?

There is no clear answer to this…and to clarify to those who didn’t see the question this person is referring to, it was this ONE

Men like different things. There is no right weight or wrong weight. Sure, most guys will agree that a flat stomach, nice boobs and round ass are what we all desire. That’s a given. For me, i just don’t want extremes of anything. I’m as unattracted to a really skinny tall girl as I am a sloppy tubby short girl. Neither do anything for me. That said, i got friends who would gladly go there with both those types.
I think the media has obviously played a big role in fucking up peoples heads about the female form. For one, they set unrealistic standards by showing girls with bodies that simply aren’t normal. On the other side of things, you have high fashion where lots of the models are straight up gross looking. They’re being picked cause of how clothes hang off their bodies, not cause they’re the definition of beauty. Not to mention, when you let other women and gay dudes pick who is and who isn’t “beautiful” that sends all sorts of mixed up messages to girls. As straight men, we’re pieces of shit, but we’re simple. Most guys will happily take a chubby girl with a cute face. In fact, many might prefer it. The girls you see on TV and in print ads are not realistic and I think most men know this. I may think Megan fox is hot but it’s not like I’m basing who I’m attracted to in real life on her.
Like I said, we’re simple. The downside of all this is that it puts pressure on girls who think they have to keep up with these unrealistic beings. The reality is, if you wanna look good, you gotta eat right and exercise (or have astoundingly good genetics). There’s a difference between being “normal” and letting yourself go. It’s unfortunate women hold themselves up to these crazy standards but I see why they do it. They see men fawning over the types and think “He likes that…so i gotta be that”. But, I’m telling you, us guys are typically not that complicated and strict. The rule of thumb for all people of all sexes should be “Don’t be a slob”. Pretty simple really.

Who are some characters from movies/tv shows that you have found yourself relating to? stuff in common and such..

Dexter. Minus the whole serial killer part. Mostly cause I’m a pragmatist who likes a nice reggae tinged theme song.

Oh, by the way, I’d heading to europe on wednesday for two weeks so, if you live in Brussels, munich, paris, bordeaux, Kiev or Pecs come see me play music:
https://phatfriend.com/2013/08/27/upcoming-blockhead-shows-tis-the-season/

Also, because of this trip, my blog out put might be scattered. I’ll try my best though. See you on the otherside…

6 thoughts on “Answers for questions vol. 164

  1. Parents have that natural ability in perceiving what is real… Wisdom definitely comes with age, but personally turning 40 was a “whoa” moment and an adventure of having to get glasses for the first time and sitting “Indian style” doesn’t happen anymore!. But, now I appreciate people/things more, will not tolerate el torro kaka and either you can love me for who I am and not what I am not.

  2. I have two:

    -Are there any rappers turned actors out there who have impressed or surprised you with their (acting) abilities?

    -I’m canadian and americans usually have this stereotypes that most canadians are overly nice and polite. What I want to know is if, in your experience, stereotypes of people hold true in any way at all when you’re dealing with online interactions versus real life? (i.e. canadians being polite)

  3. On the subject of the female physique and in reference to your header image, I’ve always been a fan of the one dead center. Sure she’s got a little pudge, but in my opinion still pretty. She’s got a nice form and some curves. She’s normal. A chick without some curvaceousness might as well be a frigging boy scout. Not up my alley.

    If you had to choose one to have some fun with, who would it be?

  4. So I have a question.
    I have been dating this girl for the last two months. I told her that before I met her I made plans to visit my father (that I have not seen in 10 years) in penn for christmas then go up to nyc to stay with firends for new year before I met her. She is upset because she doesnt want to spend christmas alone (she is from Brazil). She wants to stay with me in nyc, which is fine for me but I need to check with my friend. She told me yesterday that if she cant she will spend the holiday with her ex and his family in boston. I am not sure if this is a genuine need to visit some friends and that is it, if she still wants to get back with him, or if this is some kind of manipulation. I am not sure about this situation and am worried that she wants to get back with her ex. What do you think is going on? If it is that she still wants to be with him should I get out of the situation or is it possible that she just neednmore time. It does not seem nornal to me to spend the holidays with your ex. But I dont talk to any of mine after we broke up.

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