Answers for questions vol. 191


l-royal-rabbit
What up world,
Summer is knocking on the door down which means my allergies are coming out to play as well. Nothing like a teary eyed, snot filled nose in hot humid weather to really get your mind in a good place.
Welcome to another edition of “answers for questions”. You ask, I answer. Nothing is off limits (unless it’s too personal but that’s rare). If you’d like to become a part of the magic, send me your questions! Either email them to me phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comment section below. Go nuts.
This weeks batch of questions are actually a great example of the variety and quality of question I look for. They’re all great so thanks to all those who contributed. Use this weeks selection as a guide, even. It’s great.

Alright Block, here’s a question…do vegans sit on leather couches?

Sure they do. They also wear leather shoes/jackets and tons of other things that conflict with their ideals. Obviously not all of them. But some of them? For sure. Thing is, i don’t have an issue with vegans, in the sense that they are adults and entitled to make their own choices. What they eat doesn’t effect me or my life. It’s only a problem when they’re the preachy kind who will talk your ear off while you’re eating a burger or a fucking piece of cheese. Those kind of vegans can go fuck themselves, on a leather couch with a dildo made of animal byproducts.

I’m not a fan of Deadmau5, or that genre in general, but I really liked this open letter he wrote calling out DJ/producers for exaggerating what they do on stage. The real art takes place in the composing of the songs, and not just triggering on stage. I thought the new SNL skit was pretty spot on (and hilarious) as well. What are your thoughts on the subject? http://deadmau5.tumblr.com/post/25690507284/we-all-hit-play

That was excellent and 100% on point.
In fact, my upcoming albums title, “Bells and whistles” is somewhat related to this. I’ve been touring for years and I always keep it simple. My computer, a trigger pad and , if possible, some visuals. Cause what I do live is literally triggering samples. Granted there are hundreds of samples in my sets but I work within a frame work that ensures the set stays on time and moves along properly. Over the years, I’ve toured with lots of people, opened for lots of people and had lots of openers of my own. One thing that has been consistent is seeing people who bring way too much shit on stage. ESPECIALLY openers. I get it more with established acts or people who actually play instruments but the amount of acts I’ve seen setting up for their 9 pm set ,that begins as the doors openm with like 5 trigger pads, synths they barely use and weird little electronic gadgets that I’m fairly certain don’t even really do anything, is astounding. It’s all, well, bells and whistles. If you’re an opening act, you should have a set up that requires no soundcheck is needed, not an extra power strip and two more tables.
As someone who has come up before electronic music was what it is today, the whole thing has always befuddled me, from a “live music” perspective. I’ll be the first to admit, my live show is not best “watched”. You come see me play and just watch me intently all night, you will be bored cause I’m just pressing buttons. I’ll never understand those people who come to the front row just to stare at me. It’s actually kinda creepy. My live shows are more for people to dance to, check out some visuals or just just vibe out to the music itself. If you like my music, you’ll be into it. The music itself is at the forefront. Not the performance. I think EDM artists (though I definitively do not consider my self one of those) are all about over compensation cause it’s not a natural thing to perform. They (we) are creatures of the studio. We’re more performing on a “DJ” level than a rock band level and sooner we just accept that, the better. Trying to make it something it’s not with all this extra , pointless theatrics makes sense but it’s also complete bullshit that, when stripped down, is usually just a dude on his computer.
I’m glad the music has reached a point where this kind of performance is acceptable and people come out and see us. Hell, it’s literally how most of us make our living. But, personally, I will never be that overhyped dude acting like me pushing that button is some skill set. I’m more focused on making sure I push the right button, to be honest.

When you read the following acronym – ATM – what’s the first term that pops into your mind? “At the moment” or “ass-to-mouth” or “Automated Teller Machine?”

The first thing I think of is the money machine. Then ass to mouth. “At the moment” has never popped in my head ever when hearing those three letters.
In general, when I say the sentence “I need to find an ATM” I’m obviously referring to those walk up prostitutes booths most corner stores have where you dip your penis in their butt, then in their mouth and they give you 80 bucks. No receipt though, thanks, I’m good.

block

you said in a demo review a while ago something like ‘these samples gel almost too well; if they’re all taken from the same track it’s kinda creatively bankrupt.’

what about same album or same artist etc? i recognize that it takes a lot more time and dedication and is more impressive, but is the crate-digger, hunt-and-gather process essential to the integrity of sample-based music?

I mean, people can do whatever they want. There are plenty of great beats out there made out of different parts of songs. I think it’s lazy , from a creative stand point, but it’s not against the rules. I will say that, it’s different when it’s done on a rap beat or on an instrumental beat. With rap beats, you got some leeway cause it’s background music for someones voice. But, if you’re instrumental track is just the same song cut up into 4 different parts, you didn’t really do shit but remix a song. There’s no originality in that.
As for taking multiple sample from different songs on the same album, I have no problem with that. Meshing parts from different songs, to me, is where the skill set is. Taking things that were not meant to be harmonious and making them that way is the name of the game (for me at least).

Folder or buncher, left or right hand? How exactly do you clean your poop? Also, do you see the penis as semi-flaccid or half hard?

I’m somewhere between the two. I don’t fold it so much but I also just turn it into a ball. That seems like it would lead to all sorts of wiping mistakes. You can’t be too cavalier about how you wipe. If you’re a folder and you don’t make enough layers, you could have the dreaded “poke through” where one of your fingers pokes through the paper right as you’re wiping resulting in a finger being launched right into your shitty butthole. That’s never a good look.
As for the penis question, I don’t look at it in one way. It’s a constantly changing being. Sometimes it’s semi hard, sometimes if totally limp. Other times I have full erection. I gauge my penis for what it is at that moment. Right now? comfortably limp.

If you had to encounter one

Would it be a ghost or an alien?

I feel like both have a stigma for being negative so it kinda depends where they’re coming at me from. I feel an angry/violent alien could do more damage , where as a ghost will fuck with you but they can’t actually murder you. They can make wind chimes shake and make you feel really uncomfortable but an alien could rip your head off.
At the same time, if neither of them were particularly violent or mean spirited, i’d definitively take the ghost cause I’m pretty sure we could communicate. Assuming the ghost speaks english. I bet you could learn a lot about the meaning of life from a ghost. After all, he/she was once alive and literally knows what happens after you die. It would definitely clear up all religious questions one might have. Where as an alien probably doesn’t have any clue what I’m saying which would be pretty annoying after a while. Like asking for directions in english in france.

if you had to bang

A huge ugly fat chick that smells

Or a hot tranny with boobs but still had her dong but was super hot and girly ?

That dong would be a deal breaker.
I mean, let’s be honest, my dick’s not getting hard for either of these people (though the tranny blow job might be pretty amazing, to be honest). I’m not into anal, especially with men who have tits and fucking a girl who smells legit bad (regardless of what she looks like) would be pretty difficult. Add on she’s fat and ugly, well, go fuck yourself, bro. How bout I just blow my brains out instead of both these options, deal? Deal.

16 thoughts on “Answers for questions vol. 191

  1. “Like asking for directions in english in france” – did you mean this got annoying for you or for the french person being asked? Because I def see the latter happening, ha.

      • I can’t think of speakers from any other language being more offended by tourists using default English than french people. I guess…history. Even if you don’t know any French at all, I swear that a quick “bonjour” or “parlez vous anglais?” and then switching to English gets you slightly farther. If the very first word out of your mouth is English, you’re done. (not like i know, because I’m not french, but that’s my guess)

  2. It seems like it’s fully wedding season, so why not this question:

    Have you ever in your whole life been the DJ at a friend’s or family member’s wedding? If so, how was this experience for you?

  3. I’m pretty sure I asked the toilet paper question twice over a week. This is mostly due to smoking doobs and not so much my obsession with your toilet habits. Well maybe a small bit..

    • Probably 100% of the toilet-related questions over the course of this blog must’ve been from guys. Guys are just obsessed with shitting and bathroom behavior ahahaha. It’s their safe place/space!

  4. At what age do you think you were the biggest asshole? I’ll give you an age range from 10 years old-35 years old.

  5. On the deadmau5 thing, I think this is a pretty good live example demonstrating skill without “selling it” too much

    Nosaj Thing – Dj set (Live on KEXP)

    But even then, you have to be watching pretty closely.

  6. Did dinosaurs have penises? Do you think there were gay dinosaurs? If there were gay dinosaurs, which one do you think was most likely a powerbottom?

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