Answers for questions vol. 196


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G’day mates! Welcome to another thrilling edition of “Answers for questions”. This is where you, the reader, send me, the writer, questions. They can be about anything. Literally. If you’d like to be a part of the magic it’s as simple as emailing me a question (or questions) at phatfriendblog@gmail.com OR simply leave them in the comments below. Be weird, get interesting. It’s your time to shine, anonymously.
Anyway, Let’s see what we got this week.

Who do you think deserves a theoretical slap to the face more? Slow (able-bodied) walkers or people who don’t say thanks when you hold the door for them.

I would say the latter. While both these factions of people drive me crazy (this question is definitely crafted for me to rant and the writer knew it), at least slow walkers aren’t rude. They’re just oblivious. I feel like many slow walkers are just people from places where the pace of living is slower in general. Then, they come to NYC and dawdle their way down the streets like it’s one big street fair, forgetting that 90% of the people here are on the go with purpose. But, still, they’re not being assholes.
Now, the people who don’t say thank you when the door is held for them are dickheads. I’m not even a stickler for manners but , goddamnit, saying thanks to someone who did you a microscopic solid isn’t that hard. especially a stranger who has no reason to do anything for you whatsoever. Even a nod of acknowledgement is enough. Something. Anything. Otherwise, it comes off like you look towards that person as a lesser being. As if it’s their job to hold a door for you. But, even if it was their job, a thank you still would be applicable. Fuck those people.

If you were experiencing the apocalypse and could pick one rapper to try to survive with, who would you pick? What rapper do you think would have the best survival skills?
Then, what if you could pick 3?
You can split it into a few categories if you want(for example: Mainstream, Underground, West Coast, East Coast, Horrorcore etc. you don’t have to do all those, just ideas).

Jesus christ dude. The last person I’d pick to help me survive would be a rapper. I’d take a 7-11 worker over a rapper cause ,at least, they know how to use a mop and deal with people. I mean, if I had to, I’d obviously wanna pick rappers I know and like as people. People like Aesop, Billy Woods, Rob Sonic, Despot, etc…but, assuming picking friends is cheating, I’d try to find a rapper with survival skills. Are there any separatist rappers? Cause that would be ideal. Those dudes know how to hunt and are extremely self sufficient. I feel like there must be one former Anticon member/affilaite who has become a separatist by now. Maybe Bubba Sparxx? I pick that guy.
As for breaking this down into categories, can’t do it. Like I said, rappers are some of the last people you’ve ever wanna lean on to survive with. Musicians , in general, really. Do you know how fast you’d die in the apocalypse if you had to rely on me? Mad fast. Like seconds after I died, you’d die but only cause whatever was killing me got to me first.

Rant: WHY do (some) guys need to sit with their legs so far apart in public spaces. Guys, are your dick and balls really that big? No, no they are not – ever. It’s gross to look at but more importantly these guys presumptuously take up extra space from the women they’re sitting next to. I’m travelling via bus right now and I’m surprised at how much this irritates me as I’m usually easy going. Blockhead, are you an asshole who sits with his legs too far apart?

While some dudes definitely overdo it with the leg spread, I hate to break it to you but it’s WAY more comfortable to spread them cause, yes, we have balls. There’s a reason not many men sit cross legged (the way women sit cross legged, I mean). Cause it smashes our nuts together. So, if there is room, a dude will generally try and spread his legs a little bit. Sorry. It’s true though. Remember, our stuff is external. It takes up space in a very central area. It’s more extreme on a guy to guy basis but , sadly, it’s real.

Do you/have you ever played volleyball?
Yup. When I was in grade school, we played it in gym class. I actually liked it a lot. I had a really good serve and was tall for my age so I was one of the only people who could spike it.
Sadly, I never played again. actually…come to think of it. I did try some beach volleyball once and it was fun too but, man, jumping and running on sand is tiring like a motherfucker.

At what age do you think you were the biggest asshole? I’ll give you an age range from 10 years old-35 years old.

Oh, that’s easy. 18-22. Not that I was an actual asshole. I’ve actually always been friendly and non-confrontational but, those years? Man…there is no one more full or shit, full of themselves and pretentious than a typical college aged white kid. At that age, I knew everything, was blindly idealistic about the worst shit and was so far from figuring anything out it was painful. The older you get, the more comfortable you get in your own skin. People who are insecure will probably always be that way but you figure out a way to be okay with a lot of that type of stuff you feel when you’re that age. Basically, 18-22 year olds are like open nerves. You think everything you feel and say matters. It’s a great time cause , for most people, real life hasn’t started yet. It feels like you’re an adult but you’re not really there yet. It’s like the minor elagues of adulthood. Things slow down as you get older and, surprisingly, it’s kinda awesome. Still, getting really old looks like it sucks so don’t read this as me big upping aging in general. I’m expecting this all to cap out somewhere in the mid 40’s and it’s a steep downhill ride from there. The saying “youth is wasted on the young” exists for a reason. Cause it’s 100% true.

Who is the more sensitive crowd out of twitter users and instagram users?
You know, a few weeks ago, i might have said Twitter but I’ve had a change of heart. I can honestly say, of the social networks (facebook included), twitter people are surprisingly the best. I say this as someone who speaks to fans and shit like that. If i were gauging from just personal friends, all three of these sites would be equally fine. but I’m dealing with strangers which is a completely different ballgame.
For all the spell correcting dipshits and the occasional overly sensitive “outraged” people on twitter, they actually tend to take things in stride. They get the concept of “this is just a joke”. Instagram is actually good for that as well but it loses out to me cause of the ability to flag pictures. That’s some censorship bullshit that’s happened to me a few times and it’s more infuriating than any twitter comment. I wrote a whole thing about this actually
https://phatfriend.com/2014/05/28/stop-snitching-instagram-edition/
But, to answer your question for real, Facebook is the worst. I had no idea how many dumb, over reacting, humorless people there were in the world until I started a facebook music page. Holy shit. It’s leaps and bounds worse, in terms of sensitivity , than both twitter and instagram combined. Just truly a hell on earth , in terms of that kind of thing. It’s basically a slight step up from youtube comments but only cause it’s not anonymous. If people could post anonymously on facebook it would basically be a scene from “Idiocracy”.

12 thoughts on “Answers for questions vol. 196

  1. After how many sequential doors is it acceptable to drop the “thank you”? In my building I’m often following the same person for three doors one after another and generally only hold myself to thanking on the first.

  2. Facebook is probably the worst because there isn’t a 140 character limit so people have all the space they want to complain

  3. Everyone I’m close to has come to the Facebook is full of assholes mindset as well and shutting them done. Why do you think people there are the worst ? Because they are. It’s like they are bored people watching people and judging them for no other reason than they have nothing going on.

    • Well, it’s different when it’s your personal page and it’s only people you actually know. When that happens you either gotta unfriend some people or “hide” them. But when it’s strangers commenting, it’s a real shit show. People have a little TOO much freedom of speech sometimes, if that makes any sense.

  4. I mean I chose twitter vs. instagram because I thought they were a lot more comparable. Think of your personal & fan page on facebook, and then think of the percentage out of that total that may not even know what instagram and twitter are! I bet the number is shockingly higher than you’d think. Couldn’t say the same for the other two: all of twitter knows about facebook & instagram and all of instagram knows about twitter & fb.

  5. Idiocracy is underrated and hilarious, that is all. Also I think canibus could be a decent survivalist. He’s atleast educated on some useful stuff.

  6. I got a trivial question for you, Block, however it involves Crocs, so you know, not so trivial after all.

    Me and the girlfriend are going on vacation this september. We want hot weather, the sun, the sea and shit like that. The place that looks like the best deal for us is all good, however the beaches there are apparently pretty damn rocky. Since we both want to go to the sea and not just sit near the pool like all these fat tourist slobs that never leave the hotel, this presents a problem. In past years I’ve been on a few rocky beaches and going through all these fuckin rocks every time you want to swim is kind of a pain in the ass, especially with waves crashing on you when you try to find your footing and not look like an idiot or fall on all these rocks and shit. The few reviews I read on this place advises some swimming footwear. In the past I tried flip flops (I only wore them in the hotel room or on the beach, never on the stret), but these are kind of really unreliable in the sea and you can lose these fuckers easily when a wave catches you.

    So for the first time in my non-Crocs wearing life, I am considering buying shitty, cheap Crocs-type of things for the sole purpose of commuting from the beach to the sea. Obviously, I am very conflicted. Crocs are embarassing and shitty and make you look like an idiot, but at the same time so does falling on some rocks or walking like you’ve just learned to make your first steps when you submerge/emerge in/from the sea. Everything else about that vacation deal is great, so I don’t plan to go anywhere else, but I find myself in a comfort vs bad looks kind of situation.

    If you were in my predicament, what would YOU do? Would you just do what I usually did and stumble your way into the sea like an idiot, or would you say “fuck what anybody thinks, Crocs seem to be the best solution for my problem”? Would you recommend me some other cheapass “beach footwear” that I am unaware of but would work better? HELP ME.

  7. What season do you think is your busiest, in terms of your occupation? When do you think you have the least free time – summer, fall, winter or spring?

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