Yay or Nay- Where are the now?

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I was surprised to see I’ve been doing this these “Yay or Nay” posts for a few years now. I was curious to see how some of these guys fared , so I dug in the crates. This is pretty much an update or how the music life has treated some of the artists I spot lighted a while back. Let’s take a look…

Chance the rapper
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When we last saw him…
He had just released his video for “Juice“, It was going well and his trajectory was definitely on the up and up.
This is what you thought of him:
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Since then…
He released on of the more critically acclaimed albums of last year in “Acid rap“. He was featured in XXL’s annual freshman Class , did a song with Childish Gambino and performed at lallapalooza (that still happens?). I’m not sure but I’d guess he was touring pretty successfully right now and , well, things are good for him.

Looking back…
To me, he was one of those rappers who I clearly see has star potential and broad appeal. That said, while his album Acid Rap was good, I didn’t find myself checking it that much. It’s more just a preference thing to me. Kinda like Kendrick Lamar. undeniably talented, just not for me personally. But, fuck what I think cause Chance is pretty much lined up to be one of the next big things in rap music in the very near future.

Spark Master Tape
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When we last saw him…
He had released one mixtape “Syrup Splash” and the lead single from his next mixtape “Half of Nepal“. Due to the mystery surrounding him, there was as much talk about who is as there as about his actual music.
Here’s what you thought of him
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Since then…
He dropped his second Mixtape “The #Swoup Serengeti“. SMT is definitely one of those “You love it of you don’t” kinda acts. He remains a complete mystery. That said,I’ve seen some amazing detective work done online to figure out who he is. While this research could be faulty , it looked on point and all I can say is he is no one any of us have ever heard of prior to SMT. He’s also apparently not even from North America…which is fucking mind boggling to me. Whatever though…keep making the good music and he could look like the netherlands soccer team for all I care.
From what I hear, he’s got a new mix tape dropping this year.

Looking Back…
I fucking love this dudes music. All of it. His last mixtape was easily top three for me last year and I can’t wait for his new shit. When I posted his music, initially, i was expecting my readers to loath it. After all, you guys generally don’t react well to rap about guns, drugs and basic low life behavior. But the response was shockingly positive and I was pleasantly surprised.
To this day, pretty much both of his mixtapes are in my Ipod and get run on a weekly basis.

Milo
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When we last saw him…
He was churning out ep’s and gaining a strong fanbase. He had just aligned himself with west coast crew “The hellfyre club” and was touring extensively.
Here’s what you though of him
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Since then…
He’s been as prolific as any artist I can think of. He put out three ep’s in 2013, did a ton of guest spots, was featured on the Hellfyre clubs mixtape “Dorner Vs Tookie”, as well as putting out music almost daily on his bandcamp. Looking at his numbers in the poll, he’s probably one of the most overwhelming “YAY!” votes I’ve had.

Looking back…
I was honestly on the fence about the guy. Not cause of a question of his talent, but more the style of rapping he did. I wasn’t sure it was for me or not. Clearly, you guys felt strongly about him though so it would appear that you guys saw it all a long.

Wiki AKA RatKING
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When We last saw him…
He was just calling himself Wiki. He had a few videos here and there and there was talk of him being signed to XL records. Thing is, between the videos I posted and his next release, it appeared as if he had just not panned out. I saw very little new music and what I did see was kinda noisy hell. I kinda assumed he had flared out. Well, that was as wrong as wrong can be…
What you guys though of him
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Since then…

After being quiet for about a year (apparently they were working on the album and perfecting their live show), Wiki came back with a group called “RatKing”. Now signed to XL, they just dropped a really good album called “So it Goes“. The group did a great job of blending Wiki’s rappity rap roots with futuristic production, all while maintaining a cool punk rock aesthetic , without making noise rap.

Looking back

When I first heard Wiki, he seemed like a quintessential NYC type rapper. He could rap, had a ton of energy and seemed hungry. He reminded me of a young Cage. I gotta say though, he surprised the shit out of me with the direction he took. Not only that, but the fact it worked so well. Even as a fan of his earlier work, I would never have guessed he’d go where he did and I’m glad it went that way.

Intuition
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When We last saw him…
He was two solo albums deep and dropping new videos every so often. Intuition had a loyal but small following. He was always one of those dudes I saw as having the potential to be VERY BIG. Aside from being a skilled rapper who makes really good songs, he was a white guy that girls like , who rapped about his feelings. That’s a huge market right there.
Here’s what you guys though about him
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Since then…
He’s been a busy guy. Not only did he finally release his album with his production partner Equalibrum (Entitled “Intuition and Equalibrum“) but he’s been doing a really awesome Podcast called “Kinda neat“. It’s basically like Marc Maron’s Podcast but with underground musicians.

Looking back…
He’s taking his time with releases but he’s one of the more focused artists I know. Very attentive to details in both the songs he makes and how he uses social media/the internet to his advantage. While he’s definitely a “type” of rapper (if #barz are your shit, you will not be on board with Intuition) he’s one of those dudes I keep waiting to see blow up on a major scale. I mean , shit, he’s much better than Macklemore and look how well that dude is doing…

Shirt
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When we last saw him…
He was known as T.shirt. He had a few albums on Bandcamp but had really gained exposure for his song “Automatic“, which had a crazy video to go with it.
Here’s what you guys thought of him
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Since then…
It’s seemingly been an interesting ride for Shirt. He drops mix tape songs here and there, gets love on hot 97, seems like he might be taking his music in one direction (more mainstream) but then drops his new mixtape “Rap“, which was both awesome and anything but mainstream. He also pulled a prank where he made up a new york times article about himself and posted it online. It was actually pretty awesome.

Looking back…
He’s a curious dude. He clearly has a game plan but , I’ll be damned if I can figure it out. All i do know is that he makes good music. He’s got good taste in beats too. He has an air of mystery to him simply cause , at least it seems this way, he doesn’t really give a shit about blowing up off his music. It’s like he makes money elsewhere and does music for fun. Honestly, dudes who do that tend to often be great cause they’re not trying to please anyone.

Answers for Questions vol. 195

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Good day everyone. Welcome to another edition of “Answers for Questions”. You ask it, i answer it. It’s the least complicated concept on earth. If you’d like to join the fun, feel free to send me questions. Either email them to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments section below. As always, keep it interesting. These answers are only as good as your questions.
Anyway, let’s see what’s popping this week…

Was it surprising that Aesop wanted to produce Skelethon primarily by himself? Considering you two have worked together so heavily on his other albums.
And do you think you two will work together on future projects, even if it’s not as much as, say, Labor Days?

Aesop has always made beats. I feel like a lot of people don’t realize he produced almost half of both Float and Labor Days and most of Appleseed. He’s been doing it as long as I have. Prior to Skelethon, he had been really digging into beat making more than ever. He did the whole Felt 3 album and that Nike Running thing was in a zone with making beats. So, when it came time to do that album, i wasn’t surprised at all that he opted to do it all himself. On top of him just really embracing the production side of things more than ever, he also lives like 3000 miles away from me and understandably didn’t wanna make an album over email. We did some of that with “None Shall Pass” and , while that stuff came out awesome, I fully get the concept of actually working together in the same room being a crucial creative element.
As for future stuff, I dunno. I’d hope we do but you never know. I stay doing remixes for him and we did a song together last year that’s supposed to come out somewhere at some point but, beyond that, I suppose it’s a matter timing and what projects he decides to work on in the future.

Which Roger Hargreaves character would you be for the Mr. Men book series? (you can make it up, doesn’t have to already exist)
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I used to loooooove these books. In fact, it’s safe to say, my enjoyment of reading peaked with these.
It’s hard to limit myself to just one of these guys. I mean, I’m a mix of so many of them. I’d say I land somewhere between Mr. Rush, Mr. Happy and Mr Lazy.
I’ll tell you who I’m not…Mr Tickle. Cause that creep is like a walking court case waiting to happen. Don’t ever bring your kids around Mr. Tickle.

Hey block, I’ve been listening to your podcast and I think you n po are doing an awesome job, very entertaining stuff. But let me turn the tables here, I’d like to ask you what podcasts you got in the rotation? and also if you had the chance to be a guest on the podcast of your choice, which would it be? I know this may sound an awful lot like someone asking what albums you been bumping or favorite song or some shit, but trust me its nothing like that. cheerz!

I listen to a decent amount of Podcasts. The ones I bump on the regular are “The Champs”, “Call chelsea Peretti”, “Comedy Bang Bang”, WTF, “Uhh yeah dude”, Bill burr’s “Monday morning Podcast”, “Desus Vs. Mero” and “Who Charted?”. Other I listen to , depending on the guest, are “Shots Fired”, Jay Mohr, Joe Rogan, “Fitzdog Radio”, “Kinda Neat”, “Who did this get made?”, and “Combat Jack.
Of the ones I’d like to go on? I mean, I feel like The Champs and WTF would be the most fun for me. I’ve done Shots fired and Kinda neat and they were both awesome to be on. But being on a non-music based one would be interesting.

So I wear sunglasses on the subway sometimes. The reason being is that sometimes I get migraines (with aura) so if I feel one coming on or if one has already started, those glasses help. I know I probably look like an asshole, and I’m totally fine with that, but how much of an asshole do you think I appear to be?

Anyone who wears sunglasses indoors looks like an asshole. I understand you have your reason and that’s perfectly acceptable BUT, it doesn’t change the fact that you look like a dickhead. It’s like the L.A. dude who wears a wool hat in 90 degree weather. Maybe he has a really cold head all year around? But, even if he does, he looks like a dipshit.
That said, you can do whatever you want. Don’t like societies rules of proper sunglass conduct hold you back from stopping your migraines. Seriously, if it makes you feel better than fuck what people (and me) think. Besides, you don’t know us and you don’t owe us anything.
And, who knows, I’d venture to bet there are a few people who see it and think “Whoa…that dude must be a bad ass…he’s got sunglasses on…IN DOORS!”. It’s basically the adult version of a little kid wearing a leather jacket that reads “bad to the bone” on the back.

What do you admire about your mom?

My mom is awesome. It’s hard to pick specific things about her that I admire cause she’s a pretty all around person. She’s smart, open minded, reasonable and patient. She’s fair and also can cook really well when she feels like it. Also, she made me, which was really awesome of her to do.

Sex questions Speed round:
Is there anything that women get to do that men usually can’t do which makes you envious? (dig deep – I’ll be disappointed if the only answer you can come up with is: they can have sex whenever they want).

Give birth! just kidding. That sounds like the worst. Hmm…I actually am not envious of women from a sexual angle at all cause, well, they gotta deal with men. That’s must be a nightmare. As men, we just have to stick our dick in things, move it around and that gets the job done. It’s so much more complicated and mental for women. I want no part of that. I’m sure the payoff is better (Judging from male and female orgasms, it’s not even close) but, still…sex is something I’d like to simplify, not make more confusing.
So, umm…envious…hmm…This is tough. I feel like the answer here is to be able to feel a certain level of emotional bond with another person but, i dunno…I’m not envious of that at all either. I like being a soulless robot.
I’m sure there are a bunch of things I’m just obviously overlooking but, I gotta say, I’m stumped. It should also be noted, I’m not a particularly envious person by nature.
So, My answer is gonna be to have better flexibility and higher pain threshold. Seems like a cop out but it’s the only thing I can come up with that makes any sense.

Are you a fan of squirting? Referring to both watching it in porn and in life.
In real life, it’s cool. It’s definitely not something you wanna deal with every day. I mean, who does that much laundry? But, when it happens, it definitely feels like you’ve accomplished something.
In porn, i don’t really get into it. Partially cause it’s fake 99% of the time and partially cause the excitement of making a girl squirt is that YOU make that girl squirt. I don’t give a shit about seeing some other dude make it happen.

Have you ever noticed an errant nipple hair while touching a woman’s boobs?
Once or twice. I’ve never been faced with a hairy titted lady though. Just , like, one little hair here and there. It’s no big deal.

I think that the most common general fantasy that women have while masturbating is unrestricted sluttiness and variations on that theme. There will never be a concrete answer for this obviously, but what do you think women tend to masturbate about?

I’ve spoken to many different women at length about this cause I find it fascinating. So, off the bat, there is no general answer to this. The only thing I have gathered is that women have much better imaginations than man AND a lot of their fantasies are based in very specific situations. The attention to detail is crazy. Like , i know a girl who told me she masturbated to a look a guy gave her. Meaning, she’ was flicking her bean to a look that, in her fantasy, lead to a conversation. She said they didn’t even have sex in her mind. It was about the build up. As a dude, do you know how crazy that sounds? But, then again, on the other side of things, I’ve spoken to girls who will just be like “Yeah, i just imagine this guy I like fucking me in a nice place”. So, yeah…I’d say you guys are all over the map. Meanwhile, dudes just scroll through porn videos with their dicks in their hands looking for that one thing that makes them say “eh…i can finish to this…”.
Humans are beautiful creatures.

Yay or Nay: This new Camp Lo song

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Thanks to wonders of google (and my fleeting memory), I just looked up how long ago Camp Lo’s debut album, Uptown saturday Night, dropped. 1997. Honestly, I would have guessed it came out earlier but maybe that just goes to show how timeless an album it is. But, still, 17 years is a long time. In one year, we will all be able to have consensual sex with that album in all 50 states of the US. That’s a big deal. Anyway, I bring that up because I feel Camp Lo is one of the more down low consistent groups of all time. Sure, all their albums post “Uptown Saturday Night”, may have slipped under the radar but, quality wise, they’ve never really faltered. Not only that, but they’re also a group that I can confidently say have never sounded like anyone else. Or dressed like anyone else, for that matter.
Well, it’s 2014 and apparently they have a new album dropping on Nature sounds records. An album entirely produced by legendary beat maker Ski Beats. The same dude who did all of Uptown Saturday Night. As a fan, I’m pretty excited about the whole thing. The first song leaked off it this week and I’m wondering what your take on it is. What do you think?

Preview reviews of movies I’ve never seen Vol. 6

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Hi there. Movies are expensive, AMIRITE?!? Sometimes, all you need to see is shown in the trailers. I’d venture to say the majority of movies we see are worse than their previews. So, Instead of wasting two hours and 15 bucks on sitting through some crap I know I’ll hate, I opt to review the trailers. It’s a time saver and, honestly, I have a pretty high success rate with these reviews. I definitely didn’t get “Gravity” right but, come on…who saw that one coming?
Anyway, join me as i talk entirely out of my ass about movies I have never seen.

Horrible bosses 2

Sequels are a curious thing. 95% of the time they’re terrible but , at least, I understand why they exist. The original movie made some people a lot of money so those people wanna cash in again. In the case of things like The Hunger Games or Lord of the rings, it’s makes all the sense in the world. I don’t care about either of those franchises, but I get it. However, comedy sequels are a problem. Right now, I’m sitting here trying to think of a really good comedy sequel. I recall loving Police Academy 3 when I was a kid. Bill and Ted’s second movie was actually better than the first one. Adam’s family values, Naked Gun, Airplane…so, it’s not like they haven’t existed BUT, in general, comedic sequels are the worst. Anyone who’s seen the newest Anchorman can attest to that.
In the case of “horrible bosses”, we have a movie that was pretty wack to begin with, didn’t need a sequel and , honestly, could have just been left alone to become a mild cult favorite for dumb people that plays on Comedy Central 5 times a week. That’s should be “Horrible Bosses” legacy, at best. But, instead, they opted to get the whole cast together and pretty much do the norm for comedy sequels. Follow the exact same formula as the first one , rehashing old jokes and basically giving the consumer exactly what they want…to a fault.
So, depending on where you stand, this could be a perfectly fine movie. If you’re the type who likes to repeat catch phrases from movies all the time, this might be your shit. If you loved “Horrible Bosses” and thought “man, I’d love to watch this again, I just wish it could be done where all the scenery in the first one was subtly changed and the lines were different…but it’s the exact same film”, then this will be a game changer from. Keep in mind, I’m basing this off the trailer but I’d pretty much bet my life on this prediction.

Reach Me

This is like if the makers of the Expendables and Sharknado joined forces. The casting power of the Expendables , getting every character actor from the 90’s and b-list non-star they could find (Nelly! E from Entourage!) crossed with whatever type of cameras they use to make those sci-fi channel movies. I think it’s hand held camcorders but I could be wrong about that. This is an ensemble fucking cast right here. Kevin Bacon not being in this movie is a minor tragedy.
As for the movie itself, I honestly have no clue what’s going on. Seems like one of those “everyone’s got their troubles, can’t we all find a common ground” kinda movies that consist of a lot of people giving knowing looks to one another after someone yelling life advice at them. You know…that kinda movie. Basically, this is like if someone made a movie about shitty advice. Did i mention Nelly is in it? Andelay andelay mami e-iiiiiiiii! What’s poppin’ tonight!

Hercules

Now, I have no intention of seeing this but I’m of the school of thought that The Rock is the perfect action star. I fucking love him. Even though i’m pretty sure hercules was not a samoan/black dude, i think casting him in this gives it the best possible chance to be not terrible. He’s huge, charming, funny and his acting level perfectly fits what roles like this call for. That said, there seems to be a problem with action movies that take place in olden times of armor and chariots. The problem is that they tend to fucking suck. It’s funny that a TV show like “Game of Thrones” came along and knocked it out the park, meanwhile, all these types of fantasy/action movies seem to suffer from the same bullshit. Corny effects, terrible scripts and, most of all, lead actors that can’t carry the movie. While I’m pretty sure this will follow suit in the first two departments , at least I know the Rock will do his best to make this watchable.

Let’s be honest. What people wanna see , with movies like this ,is action , cool special effects and violence. That’s it. In general, action movies are best when they trim the fat (love stories, emotional plot lines) and just go hard in the paint. Take the recent judge Dread remake. It was literally an hour and half of violence and it was fucking awesome. How much better would every Godzilla type movie be if it began with the attack and ended with the creature being killed (or whatever). All the dumb backstory doesn’t matter. No one cares why. We just wanna see crazy shit happen in a visually stimulating way. That said, This movie is probably rated PG-13 so it doesn’t even have a chance but, goddamnit, I’m still rooting for the Rock.

Get on up
Jimi: All is by my side



Here’s a two for one. Two music biopics coming out soon. In one, we have the guy who played Jackie Robinson playing James Brown (Dude has the biopic game on lock, dun). The other , we have Andre 3000 playing Jimi Hendrix.
Now, I have a funny relationship with musician Biopics. I’ll watch any of them (on Tv) but I generally think they’re terrible movies. Cadillac Records, ray, Walk the line…all watchable but, overall, crappy movies. I think it’s hard to make a movie about someone who was so revered without falling into common traps. The “roller coaster ride of a life” story is one that comes up in every one cause, well, that’s how they lived. Ups and down. It’s not like the film director and writers is gonna skip all that. They can’t. So, it not their fault. These moves are set up to be corny. Even when they end in tragedy, heartstrings are getting pulled in a manipulative way. This is fine and all but I think my issue is that, when making a movie about a music legend, they tend to do it with kid gloves. Sure, they’ll show them during the bad times, strung out on drugs and cheating on their wives. But, outside of that, they’re fucking saints. i know it’s a lot to ask for and it would be disrespectful to the families but, just once, i’d like to see a biopic where they portrayed the star like the asshole he was. Let’s be honest, musicians are some of the most selfish and self centered people on earth. Let’s see that expressed on the big screen! I bet they could make a movie about Ty cobb’s life and they’d still find a way to make it sentimental. Just once, I want a famous talented person to die in a movie about them and feel like “You know what? It was his time to go…fuck that guy…”
In the case of these two movies, The james brown one seems more interesting to me. Simply cause I’m more curious about his come up. Also, unlike the Jimi Hendrix movie, they got the right to use his music in their film which is gonna make a huge difference. Meanwhile, the Jimi movie is gonna have clips of him performing weird versions of songs they couldn’t get the licensing for. Hits such as “Purple hanes” , “Foxy woman” and “all along the seetower”. And , listen, Andre 3000 is a fantastic rapper. We all love him. But he’s not a good actor. He might one day be one, but just from the clips in this trailer, it’s clear he’s not there yet. I know we’re all programmed to love everything that dude does (for good reason, he’s unbelievably talented) but acting is not one of his gifts.
While, it sounds like I’m shitting on these movies, rest assured, i will watch them on cable. Over and over again. I think i’ve seen “Ray” like 15 times by now. I’m a sucker for music based movies. The key word there is “Sucker” though.

New song With Marq Spekt- Grilchy 808

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Hey! Peep the second single from my album with Marq Spekt “Grilchy 808”. The album, “Justplaywitit”, drops July 29th on Hipnott records!
This song is something very different for both Spekt and I. In fact, I can safely say you’ve never heard either of us involved in a track like this before. Instead of explaining it, just peep it:

Also, if you missed the first single “Sumofitsparts”, here it is:

Okay? okayyyyyy.

Demo Reviews vol. 51

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Whattup everyone,
Time once again for “Demo Reviews”. I missed last week cause i got food poisoning and , honestly, I didn’t wanna have to sit and review a bunch of these while feeling like I wanted to vomit. I’m not even kidding. Nothing personal. I couldn’t even watch TV for a day or two.
Anyway, this is where people send me their demos for me to review. Why me? Probably cause I’m the only guy who asked and people will do anything for a little shine. No shame in that game.
At the moment, I’m not accepting new submissions right now so, if you wanna send me something, hold on to it until the next time I open the floodgates. It’ll be a while but I will announce it. Anything sent to me prior to that, I just ignore.
The reviews work like so: I write a paragraph on the song and then arbitrarily rate the songs from 1-10 in these categories:
Production
Vocals
Listenability
Originality

Pretty simple. I’d like to stress the the written portions are way more informative and direct than the number ratings but, you know, people love to be quantified so I oblige.
Here’s this weeks batch:

Artist:SFSM
Song: ’89 Swag (Feat. White Mic)


This is a curious song. I think the rappers are actually pretty good from a technical standpoint. The first guy reminds me of Murs a little. The subject matter is a little corny (hip hop hooray!) but they’re good enough rappers to make it okay. My problem here is this abysmal beat. I mean…this shit REALLY sucks. Bad drums, highly repetitive in the worst way, not mixed well, etc…I dunno if this is an attempt to capture 89′ styles but i was around in 89 and the beats didn’t sound like this. If someone could remix this, it would be straight up dope though.
Production:2 out of 10
Vocals:6 out out 10
Listenability:4.5 out of 10
Originality:4 out of 10

Artist:Thesis
Song:Make it count pt. 2


This is solid. Nice jazzy beat that’s well executed. It could use some change ups here and there but you get a little leeway with that kinda shit with rap songs. The rapper sounds kinda like an underground NElly, voice wise. He can rap. I don’t exactly feel drawn in to any of his lyrics but he’s got good presence and a strong voice.
Production:5 out of 10
Vocals:5.5 out of 10
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:4 out of 10

Artist:The Thangs
Song:Wedodo


I like the drums on this a lot but, tonally, this is kind of a disaster. It’s like when you’re listening to a song on your computer and a pop up ad opens and all of a sudden there are two songs playing at once. It’s kind of a well made mess.
Production:4.5 out of 10
Vocals:n/a
Listenability:3 out of 10
Originality:5 out of 10

Artist: Chris Nova X Zunk
Song: Your Knife


This beat is almost amazing. It’s a showcase of some cool chopping and production tricks but some of the melodies don’t hit right. It’s a little pitchy.It’s actually hard to review cause, on one hand, this producer is obviously very skilled but he also needs to understand how melody works a little better.
I was actually surprised to hear a rapper pop up in this. He’s okay but ultimately forgettable. He sounds like back ground noise to the beat but, hey, he can flow so that’s something.
Production:Somewhere between a 3 and a 6.5 out of 10 (Shit is all over the place)
Vocals:4.5 out of 10
Listenability:4 out of 10
Originality:6 out of 10

Artist:Tiny Leg
Song: Inferno (feat. Minnesota Fats)


This is very much some bedroom shit. The beat is simple and sounds like it’s not really done yet. But, it’s kinda weird in a good way. The drums are interesting. Dunno if that’s on purpose or cause they don’t know how to make heavier drums. The rapping is okay. Some interesting personal shit but it feels like I’m not supposed to be listening to it. Like it’s a some stoned guy reading his diary to me.
Production:4.5 out of 10
Vocals:5 out of 10
Listenability:5 out of 10
Originality:4.5 out of 10

Artist:Gnome Sayin
Song: Apollo 6


This is a strange one. First off, the beat is hard. This is one I know Aesop would love. It sounds like it’s a lot of fun to rap to. Very Hail mary mallon-ish to me.
As for the rapping, I’m not sure what’s the aim. The guy is a perfectly good rapper but I feel like there’s an angle I’m missing here. Like , is this a character? No clue. Regardless, overall, it’s not bad at all but a little one note.
Production:5.5 out of 10
Vocals:5 out of 10
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:5 out of 10


Artist:COWTSHTF
Song:The Laugh Track


I can’t do typical conspiracy theory raps. Sorry…it’s not for me. so, off the bat, I’m out on this one. The beat is pretty bad here. It’s more just not my style of beat but, more so, I don’t like the drums or the synth sounds used. The rapper has a lot to say but I can’t say I’m too curious to listen. Again, listenable conspiracy raps are few and far between.
Production:3.5 out of 10
Vocals:4 out of 10
Listenability:4 out of 10
Originality:4.5 out of 10

Artist:Gorgeous Geordie
Song:Inverted love triangle


If you’ve ever wondered what happens when you mix emo cloud rap and Non-phixion, here is your answer. I just don’t think this works. it’s got some cool parts in the production but, the overall product is not making sense. The beat doesn’t match the rappers style AT ALL. He’s got the urgent/need to take a shit, angry white guy style and this beat needs someone way more stoned/mellow. Props on flipping the No doubt sample though, I think it actually worked pretty nicely.
Production:5.5 out of 10
Vocals:3.5 out of 10
Listenability:4.5 out of 10
Originality:4

Artist: Kenyll Boyz
Song: KB Anthem


Now this sounds like some 89′ type shit. The rapping, unfortunately, is some 85′ shit. We get it, you loved the beastie boys. It’s a bit much in that respect cause the line of paying homage and just straight up biting is blurry here. It’s a little past the point for that revival to happen. That said, they seem like they’re having fun so I can’t be that mad at this. In fact, it’s actually way more listenable than it has any right to be.
Production:5 out of 10
Vocals:3.5 out of 10
Listenability:5 out of 10
Originality:3 out of 10

Artist: Notiz Yong
Song:You Don’t Know


First thing, not feeling the beat. It’s just a synthy garbled mess. To be fair, I’m not the target audience for this kind of track but, you know, you sent it to ME to review so it is what it is. The rapper is pretty good. I’d say his voice is the best thing about him but, overall, he’s on point.
Production:2.5 out of 10
Vocals:5.5 out of 10
Listenability:4 out of 10
Originality:4 out of 10

What do you think?

Answers for Questions vol. 194

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Sup brah? Oh, hey girl?
How was your weekend of independence? I hope it was free.
Welcome to another edition of “Answers for questions”. You ask, I answer. As always, I’d love you to participate. In fact, not only that, but do so in an original and strange fashion. Send me questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comment section below. I accept everything.

On the last Rogglecast you guys bemoaned the sense of entitlement that you inferred from Kickstarter projects. To paraphrase you said something like “back in the old days you worked for your art and suffered to put yourself out there”.

Interestingly, an artist I’m a fan of has gone one step further back beyond “the old days” and is doing some strange Romanesque artistic patronage strategy. He proposed a limited run of $50 in advance for all of the material that he would release in a calendar year, plus some other bonuses, just so that he might have some financial stability up front.

I just wondered what you thought of that? Is it the same as Kickstarter, or more noble, or more pretentious, or just weird? Does it compromise the “artistic struggle”?

Sounds like a Kickstarter off-shoot to me. It’s still an artist asking others to fund his own art. It’s especially strange cause , and I could be mistaken here, he sounds like he’s doing fine art. Painting or sculpture. That type of art is so much more subjective, I can’t imagine just blindly giving that dude money to see what he comes up with. At least with film or music you have some basis on whether or not the product will be to your liking. That basis being “i like this guys last album” or “The movie stars so and so, who I’m a fan of”. With this, he could take that $50 bucks and make art out of baby blood and used tampons. Who fucking knows?
But yeah, it’s the same concept as kickstarter to me. Art existed fine before kickstarter. Broke people made due with what they had and still created. The addition of begging strangers for hand outs is very “un- artistic” to me. That said, if anyone ever feels like sending me money for anything, I’ll take it cause money is awesome.

What was your take on grunge while it was happening/in retrospect?

During that era, I was as deeply immersed in rap as a human possibly could be. I’d say that was my most , over the top, purist stage ever. So, pretty much nothing else was getting in to my musical interests that didn’t contain a rapper and a beat.
I clearly Kurt Cobain dying and not caring an iota. I went to school that day and a few kids were really broken up about it. I literally gave it a passing thought of “oh, whelp, that happened…” and that was it. I didn’t even think about it again.
When the rap/rock album “Judgement night” soundtrack dropped (not grunge but, to me, it shared the same space), I hated it deeply (accept the de la/ teenage fanclub song, which i thought was okay, at the time). The whole idea of the album was a failure to me. Like oil and vinegar. I stand by that to this day though. That album fucking sucked.
Looking back, i still don’t like any of that genre. It just wasn’t for me. Grunge , in particular, seemed rooted in angst and that simply wasn’t a quality I had or supported back then. I always related grunge and music like it with being very suburban. Like “hanging out behind the 7-11 drinking beers and smoking cigarettes on a weekend night” type of music. To be fair, I just never really got into most rock music in general. Especially stuff post 1980.
So, to answer the question, I didn’t give a fuck about at all back then and I still pretty much don’t give a fuck about it now. 90’s rock , in general, is some of my least favorite “current” music ever. Better than Reggaeton, but still pretty bad, in my opinion.

It’s become apparent that I’m a good writer who is terrible at speaking, born of little talking and tremendous reading. I doubt that will change in the future as this summer I’ll probably be spending more time alone than ever. On top of being bad at articulating my points, I lack the momentum to get all of whatever I can do out there without the conversation moving on 12 times and I begin to feel like the asshole trying to bring it back to what I really wanted to mention but can’t.

My teachers agree I’m one of the more well-read high school students they’ve met, and I’ve moved beyond the fear of coming off as self-righteous when I say that I actually have things to say, and there’s a fear of not being able to say what’s mine to say, as Updike put it.

In fact I’ve recently found myself suppressing urges to tell people things just because I know it won’t come out like I hope it will, which develops issues when my boyfriend’s involved and sharing information becomes kind of relevant. The best I can hope for is to ramble long enough that he gets some idea of what I mean without falling into some pitfall of words that only gives me more to explain than before.

So obviously, I think to myself, “What would the guy from Dour Candy do?”

This was originally gonna be in “Ask Dr. Tony” but I opted to drop it here.
First off, I’m not sure what the question is here. Are you asking how you can become someone who can express thoughts better verbally? It would appear your writing is as confusing as you describe your social interactions to be. If that is your question, I have no idea. We all have different ways of functioning socially. Some are quick witted in person but can’t spell. Others are more internal and socially awkward. You sound like the latter. I suppose the best you can do is just get more comfortable with the idea of speaking socially. You have a boyfriend…talk to his dumb ass. Maybe try and slow down your mind when speaking to people. Simplify your train of thought. Easier said than, done, I’m sure but, hey , this honestly seems like a problem for a real professional to help you with. Not a guy who made the beats on “Dour Candy”.
I’d also add that just cause you’ve read a ton of books, that doesn’t immediately translate into you being a smarter person. That just means you’ve read a lot of books. I know plenty of complete idiots who are extremely well read. If you love reading and get something out of it, that’s cool. You’re lucky to have a passion like that. Just don’t think that one thing automatically makes you better at anything. I’d advise heavily against becoming one of those people who quotes writers all the time in conversation cause , not only does it come off as smug and pretentious, but ain’t nobody got time for that shit. Save it for a book club.

What is something you enjoy doing that most other people don’t enjoy doing? (besides laundry, that’s too easy of an answer)

I find Sacrificing virgins to be reflective and calming. Just kidding.
I like stats. I like keeping track of them and even doing the math involved to keep tabs on them. When I was much younger, I used to play nintendo baseball and keep detailed stats of all my players. This was before they did it for you. I’d play entire seasons with them. To this day, I strangely enjoy it. It’s funny cause I’m not particularly good at math and, in general, the things I might keep stats on are totally pointless. I think I just enjoy seeing how things accumulate and how the laws of averages generally function.

do you fold the shit tickets or bundle them up before use? I was trying really hard here.

I do a little of both. The ass wiping curiosity out there is fascinating. This must be how girls feel when dudes ask them about dick size all the time.

Hey Blockhead,
I noticed that in a lot of the pictures of you from the early 2000’s you are wearing a beret. Have you since ditched this accessory or do you still rock it occasionally? Can you defend the wearing of a beret? I will say that you looked good in it, which is odd, because most dudes just look like a fricken’ flamer with it on.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA…a beret? I’ve never worn a beret in my life. I think you’re referring to the cabbie hat/newsie I used to wear in all my press photos. This one:
blockheadup_1_lg1
To be clear, this is a beret:
1
I can see how you might be confused but, trust me, they are wildly different styles of hats. As for that hat, I still have it but I wear it very rarely. I wore it back then cause I was not wearing baseball hats much at that time and I wasn’t wearing kangols. It just felt like a nice middle area for me. It’s a dope hat though. True story: Aesop gave it to me in college.

Pick a website:

a) OMG facts
b) Cracked
c) College Humor
d) none of the above

I don’t frequent any of these sites but I also don’t have a problem with any of them. I’d say, of the three, the one I find myself on the most is College humor. Usually cause people on facebook will post links of it. I honestly didn’t even know OMG facts was a website. I thought it was simply a twitter feed…and I prefer UBERfacts to that anyway.

A mix…FOR AMERICA, BRO!

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A few years back, I did a mix in honor of Independence day. It was basically collection of songs with the word “freedom” or “America” in them. Well, this is that exact same thing, only updated. I added a few songs, took off a few and figured, hey, who hates free music? Jerks, that’s who.
This is a mix you can play at your July 4th BBQ just as easily as you could play it at your anti-America hate rally. It could really go both ways.
So, happy 4th of July, or not. I don’t give a shit. I’m not a particularly patriotic. In fact, if NYC could succeed for the the country, I’d be 100% with it. But i digress…This is about the free music. This mix is all over the map, genre wise so , hopefully, there is a little something for everyone. Enjoy!
(sidenote: there is a chance “Freedom street” and “United states of whatever” might be corrupted due to an old hard drive crash I had. If that’s the case, my apologies. They’re not dangerous files, they just won’t play. whatever the case, the rest of the songs definitely work and it’s still some free music, guys)
Screen shot 2014-07-04 at 10.10.04 AM
Download link here!
https://www.sendspace.com/file/lbiq38

Ask Dr. Tony Vol. 36

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Hello and welcome to another edition of “Ask Dr. Tony”.
This is where you ask me to solve all your personal problems. Why me? Good question. I’m not even a licensed driver, let alone psychologist but, for some reason, I’ve been told I give decent advice. At the very least, I’m honest and have nothing to gain or lose by shooting straight. I’m Certainly a better person to ask than your dumb ass friends who probably don’t wanna deal with any of your shit in the first place. So, ask me! If you have problems that need solving, send me questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments below. It’s always anonymous and , as much as an asshole as I may seem at times, I’m only trying to help.
So, let’s get into this weeks batch….

Hi, Dr. Tony! I’m from Sweden so my english might not be that good so sorry about that! Sry for making this long! Big fan of your music btw!!

Anyways:
I have this female bestfriend that I’ve known for like 7 years and we get along great. I always make her laugh, we hang out frequently, we always have fun together and she tells me everything because I always listen and try to help her and so on.
We used to talk like every day which made me happy and less depressed so eventually I fell in love with her. I really enjoy spending time with her.
But about 3 weeks after her break up with her now ex boyfriend, she got a new boyfriend and she changed completely. She doesn’t talk to me as much as she did before and we’ve only hanged out a few times.
The few times that we’ve got together after her new boyfriend, I noticed that she changed the way she was towards me.
For example, before she had this new boyfriend, she used to hug me whenever we got together but after she got this new boyfriend, she doesn’t do that anymore. The times I tried to hug her whenever we met up or after we’ve hanged out, she just shakes me hand and then she leaves. If I had any luck.
I’ve wanted to confront her about that but I didn’t wanna get into a fight about it so I dropped it.

After about a month, she still didn’t talk to me as much as she used to. She only contacted me whenever she wanted help with something and I could not refuse because I missed talking to her.
Again, I wanted to confront her about it because it felt like she was using me but I didn’t want to get into a fight about it which might have led to us not being friends anymore. So I decided to drop it.

After several weeks, something really bad had happen to me and I really needed someone to talk to. So I asked her some questions that I thought would make her ask me “What’s wrong”? but instead she changed the subject (which she has done several times whenever something serious had happen to me and I needed someone to talk to).
So after that, I got really hurt and decided not to talk to her anymore.
She keep sending me snapchats mostly of her and her boyfriend that I still don’t answer and she even asked me about a picture of her on her facebook, but I was really cold to her so that she could notice that something is wrong, but I don’t think she has.

I’ve been thinking of talking to her a really long time now because I really miss her and I feel bad but I also really want to confront her about all this but at the same time I feel like I shouldn’t talk to her because of how she has treated me. So, what do you think I should do?

Sounds to me like you’re planted deeply in the friendzone. And not just any “friendzone” but a friendzone where you’re only of use when she needs something. I can’t speculate what her relationship with her ex-boyfriend was like but , if this new one came in and she was all of a sudden distant, it leads me to believe a few things-
1)She likes him a lot more than the last one
2)The last one was never a “permanent fixture” so she kept you around as something of an emotional tampon she could flirt and have fun with.
3)The new bf could be a more jealous type and she’s just acting this way cause she knows it wouldn’t be okay with him to hang with her platonic hug buddy all the time.
4)She’s been well aware of your feelings towards her the entire time and she’s even more aware of how to control them.
Basically, she sounds like she was never really interested in you in that way but she likes you as a person. So, she kept you around until this current boyfriend. Because she has all the power in the relationship (the person who cares less typically does), she can dictate when and how you guys see each other.
As for what you can do…well, getting pissy at her isn’t gonna help anything. That’s just you being childish cause the girl you like didn’t like you back. I know it’s easier said than done but you gotta just move on with your life. Don’t be a dick to her but also let her come to you. Chasing after her affection has already been proven to not work. You just gotta move on. Who knows, maybe she’ll break up with this guy and come back. Hopefully , by that time, you’ll have realized that she was a shitty friend from the get go and want nothing to do with her. When guys have crushes on girls, we really let that shit fog our vision, in terms of the actual type of person we’re dealing with. Now, i don’t know this girl and I do feel I’m painting her in an unfair light, based off of what you wrote. For all i know, you could be one of those annoying “ducky” from “Pretty in Pink” ass dudes. But, still, I’ve been in a similar situation in life and just moving away from it all was the best move possible. In the end, I doubt she ever had plans for you beyond friendship. That sucks for you but, hey, life isn’t easy.

Not sure if this question is for ask dr tony or questions for answers but, is it weird or gross if a girl watches porn alobe? Nothing crazy fetish like just regular bangin it out porn with two sexy people two to three times a week. Would that freak you out? I guess living with a girl who masterbates on the side when she can could be weird but if you lived seperate from your gf and she watched porn would that be a turn off or hoe flag? Or healthy and good?

It’s not weird at all. Neither is a girl masturbating if she lives with or away from her boyfriend. It’s more just that girls personal taste. Porn turns her on? Awesome.
The thing about porn is , it’s only unhealthy if you view it as so. It’s also only an issue if you see that kinda sex as real sex. There are things , i think, we can take away away from porn that are actually good for normal human sex lives. Others, not so much. Like , if a dude thinks every girl should be down to choke on cocks and take facials, that’s a bit much. Or if a girl thinks every guys dick should be 8 inches or more, she will live a life of disappointment. But, outside of the unrealistic aspects of it, porn isn’t a bad thing for a typical horny adult.
You can tell when a guy/girl watches and learns from porn cause it’s a very particular kind of sex. I’d imagine, if two people like that met up, they’d actually sync up nicely in the bedroom. Just imagine all the choking an facials via abnormally large penises they could have!
I think a lot of dudes would be into the idea of their girl watching porn cause EVEVY guy does it. Better that than have a GF who is horrified by the idea of you jerking off to porn. That girl lives in a fucking fantasy world. So, yeah, don’t worry about it. We all have needs and , if you need to bust a few nuts a week to porn, there is nothing wrong with that in the slightest.

Please give me some solid time management tips. You seem like you’re an ace on the subject of punctuality whereas I consider myself more of a noob. An (asshole) noob…

I’m one of those overly punctual people. In fact, some (everyone I’ve ever met) might call it obsessive. I’m always a little early to everything. I’d like to say it’s cause I’m not a selfish asshole and I know how annoying it is to make people wait (that’s part of it) but it’s got way more to do with me just NEEDING to be on time in general.
Thing is, I don’t know if there are any real tips for stuff like this. Telling you “go faster” isn’t gonna work. The best advice I can offer is set up realistic timeline of how long things are gonna take. My GF has this problem. She’s never calculated how long the actual traveling to the event will take so she’s always 15 minutes late. I always add on 15-30 for travel (depending on distance). For instance, If I have to be somewhere cross town at 9, I know that walking there takes 20-25 minutes. So I leave a half hour before I gotta be there. Where as my GF will leave at 8:55 , assuming a cab will be outside our door and no traffic has ever existed. I’m overly cautious, she’s less so.
Basically, just be realistic about the pace in which you move. Saying that it’s gonna take you 15 minutes to get ready , when you know it’ll take you 45 minutes, is a problem. My advice, just start the preparation earlier than you think and keep your eye on the clock. Being on time is fucking easy. It amazes me how hard it can be for some people but , in the end, it’s cause those people are either being absent minded , don’t know how time works or they’re just truly inconsiderate.

Yo Dr. Tony, maybe you could enlighten me on an issue I’ve been having. I’m 25 years old and new to the single life, yet it seems that every girl I date, no matter my intentions (i.e. strictly wanting to fuck), starts to develop feelings for me not long after we we first have sex. Now if these were 19 or 20 year old girls, I might understand that mindset of fucking someone and thinking it’s love, but these are women my age and a couple years older. I don’t have Ryan Gosling looks, so acting like a disinterested asshole doesn’t really work for me, but rather I rely on my charm and humor. Some guy friends tell me that this is where I go wrong, but I feel that if I didn’t use those traits, I wouldn’t be getting any girls at all. One of my close girl friends told me that the reason these girls fall for me is because of my stable situation (living on my own, good career, healthy and active), but I know other guys in similar situations that don’t seem to share my problem. The thing is, I had a long-term relationship in college, so I’m not exactly trying to wife anyone up at the moment. When I do tell these women that I’m not looking for a relationship, their feelings get hurt and I feel like a dipshit. My question is, is their anything I can do early on to communicate that I’m not looking for anything serious, or would these women develop feelings regardless?

Being a nice guy with a good living/life situation is always gonna create confusion with this kind of thing. I’d be willing to bet, because of those two things and that you’ve also been in a long term relationship, you give off strong “Boyfriend” vibes. Girls can sniff that shit out and , at the age you are, a lot of them are ready for a boyfriend. I had similar issues when I was single in my late 20’s and I found the best way to combat it was to be totally honest. Wear your intentions on your sleeve. I don’t mean “be a lecherous scum bag” , I mean let that person know you’re just trying to have fun and nothing too serious. The beauty of getting that out there early is that it’s really just a “proceed at your own risk” sign for girls. They’ve been warned. If they go along with it, great. If they proceed then wanna make it more serious, you still can be like “I told you what i was about”. Sometimes a girl will hear that and be like “nah, that’s not what I’m looking for” and that’s totally fine. As long as you’re understanding and cool about that, it’s a non-issue. So, yes, you may lose out on some sex here and there but, in the long run, your sanity will be kept.
It’s funny cause being the unwilling single guy who girls wanna relationship with in your 20’s is kinda like the grown up version of being in the friendzone in your late teens. If all about how you present yourself. In both cases, being a “good guy” has a lot to do with it. Sucks, right? But stay the course cause , in real life, good guys actually do tend to win eventually. At least in this respect.

This week in Internet Dickheads

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I’m not gonna lie to you, I got food poisoning last night (second time this year bt, so, you know, feeling preeeetty awesome about it) so I’m not exactly all there today. So, I’mma make my “job” easy and just hip you two a few things I saw pop up on the internet this week that had me like “Really?”
The first is possibly one of the corniest moves I’ve ever seen a rapper pull to get attention.
We’re all familiar with when rappers claim they’re “retiring”. Typically, it’s the biggest rap stars trying to drum up a way to make their next project seem important. Well, what about when a no name rapper does it before anyone has even heard of him? Yes, the music equivalent to the person who gets picked last in sports walking off the court before the teams are made. Enter this dickbag…
kadeem3423423
This is 21 year old rapper , Corduroy. He recently wrote a letter to “all blogs” and whoever about his choice to retire from the rap game…thing is, nobody knows him. Instead of me rehashing his reasons, just read it yourself:
http://pigeonsandplanes.com/2014/06/im-quitting-rap/
The funny thing about him pulling this shit is that, in a way, it worked. I bet that write up on pigeonsandplanes.com got his music more listens than it ever had before. The good news is that he’s complete mediocre on every level so it’s not like this stunt is ever going to actually work. On one hand, props to him for even trying something like this but , on the other, this is a truly depressing look at how people get attention in the music industry right now. Having a hissy fit tantrum is the new “making a demo”. ughh…Entitlement is a motherfucker.

The second thing I’d like to spotlight are these videos a reader pointed out to me. Two dudes in brooklyn have a “prank show” on youtube where they basically just try to go to the hood and get fucked up. That’s the prank. Here are some examples:


I feel as though the word “prank” has gotten away from us. A prank is when you play a trick on someone. The idea is to fuck with another person in a way that has them on their toes. Not to get yourself jumped. What these dudes are doing is more daredevil type shit but ,instead of being like the dudes from jackass, they’re trying to fuck with the last people anyone wants to fuck with. I can’t put my finger on why it feels kinda racist but it definitely does. I also won’t feel bad when either of these dudes end up in a hospital.
So, yeah, a salute to this week internet dickheads of the week! Well done, guys!