Re-up: Rare old NYC radio Freestyles and demo tapes

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When I initially started this blog about 4 years ago, one of the first posts I ever did was upping a bunch of extremely rare songs and freestyles I had recorded off the radio in the 90’s. I was looking through my I-tunes the other day and happened upon them once again. I thought “Hmm, I should bring these back out cause, logically, my readership is completely different now than it was 4 years ago.”
So, as a gift to all you meticulous rap nerds who love underground rap from the early/mid 90’s, here you go.
To be clear, these are all things I personally recorded live off the radio from shows like Stretch and bobitto, Nighttrain and Martin Moore on WNYU. I Used to stay up way past my bedtime and go to school like a zombie just so I could have the newest shit to listen to in my walkman the next day.
I’m not gonna do a track listing (it’s 27 tracks) but included in this folder of music are Rare freestyles from the artifacts, Jay-z, Cage, Redman, MAster Ace, ODB and many many more. Also, there are demo’s and unreleased songs. The demo’s are mostly obscure groups that never came out but there are a few that will surprise you. Including a super rare Kool Keith song and a Jay-Z song not many people probably know ever existed. Like I said, this is deep crate nerd shit but, if you’re like me, this will be your shit.
If you’re an audiophile who can’t deal with anything below a certain bit rate, skip this. This isn’t for you. This is all stuff recorded on cassettes off the radio. The quality varies but, at it’s best, it’s never amazing.
So, I hope you all enjoy this stuff. This is definitely the music of my youth and stuff like this is what inspired me to get into rap music in the first place.
OLD NYC RADIO GOODIES!
https://www.sendspace.com/file/n319hi

Demo Reviews vol. 61

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Hello, and welcome to a new year of Demo Reviews. You sent them in and I tell you what I think. My opinion doesn’t mean shit but, hey, at least I’ll listen, right?
Btw, shout out to the winners of last years Demo reviews!
Best rap demo:
Galactic brethren
Best instrumental Demo:
Agrume de Cereau

Well done guys. Best of luck in the future. If either of you ever make it, don’t forget the little people.
Oh, by the way, people have been sending me new demos to review the last few days and I just wanted to alert you that submissions are closed. Anything sent to me during this time gets ignored. When I need more demo’s, I’ll let you know.
Since it’s a new year, I’m switching things up a tiny bit. I’ll be review 8 demo’s at a time (instead of 10). Why? Cause doing these demo reviews is my personal hell and 8 is less than 10. Other than that, the song remains the same. I write a paragraph or two about you song then arbitrarily rate in from 1-10 in these categories:
Production
Vocals
Listenability
Originality

Remember, this is just my opinion. I am but one man. Don’t let anything I say crush your dreams.
That said, this weeks batch is an unusually good one. Really only one demo that wasn’t at least a hair above average. So, good start guys!
Let’s check them out and remember to vote for your favorite demo of the week at the bottom.

Artist:Adjective/animal
song: Best of the good stuff


I find the main loop to be very interesting and captivating. It’s both pretty and strange at the same time. The drums are understated but work within the context of the song. I’d say my only issues with this one are that it’s pretty much just that loop with drums and a few flourishes added in. It doesn’t stray too far from it’s base…until the end. If that end had perhaps been a bridge instead of an outro that led into another part all together, I woulda been really impressed.
Production:6.5 out of 10
Vocals:N/a
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:4.5 out of 10

Artist:Esbe
song: Darling


Couple issues with this one. Using the same sample as J-Dilla used on common’s “The light” is a pretty bad move. It’s simply just too famous a sample (and sample source). Outside of that, this is a very well made track. It feels more like a rap beat than an instrumental song simply cause you can tell it mostly comes from one source and it’s switch ups are limited. But, if nothing else, this was very well done.
Production:6.5 out of 10
Vocals:n/a
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:2.5 out of 10

Artist: Lazy ass specialist
Song:Tacos


His moniker could be taken a few different ways. Is he a lazy specialist or is he only lazy when dealing with ass. I guess we’ll never know.
As for the song, this guy can rap. I like his voice. I like his flow. I even like some of his rhymes. He might wanna rein in it a little and focus more of the control of his voice and flow and less on how he acts out the rhymes. But , other than that, lots of potential here. The beat is cool. Some mellow jazzy shit. Nothing mind blowing but it’s perfectly fine for the track.
Production:5 out of 10
Vocals:6 out of 10
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:4.5 out of 10

Artist: Stack hat music
song: As you wish


This is an interesting mix of electronica and hip hop. Musically, it’s very glitchy but the drums feel more like some down tempo hip hop shit. The change is a bit abrupt. I like it but the build up feels like it skips a few parts. There is a attention deficit disorder kinda charm to this. More than anything, it show potential cause the technical talent is there for sure.
Production:6 out of 10
Vocals:n/a
Listenability:5 out of 10
Originality:5.5 out of 10

artist: Outlet
Song: All night

I kinda hate acoustic guitar loops as main samples. Maybe it’s just me but, for one, they all sound the same and bring about the same emotion: Wistful. I mean, that’s a real emotion and everything but I’m not trying to feel that way unless I have to. This song does get better as it evolves though. The further it strays from the initial loop. It turns out pretty good. I like the vocal/keys part around the 2:15 mark. Don’t love the drum sounds but, really that’s a minor complaint.
Production: 6 out of 10
Vocals:n/a
Listenability:5.5 out of 10
Originality:5 out of 10

Artist: 3rdegree
song: Alley Kidz Ft. Onry Ozzborn


I just wanna put this out: Don’t send me songs done with already established rappers. It’s kinda lazy and cheap on your part. It’s happened a few times and, in general, the songs are usually pretty good but that’s not a good way to get real criticism.
Anyway, this song is cool. Onry is dope. The Alley Kidz are pretty good too. They aren’t exactly blowing my wig back but it’s solid underground hip hop shit. The beat is solid too.
Production:5 out of 10
Vocals:5 out of 10
Listenability:5 out of 10
Originality:4 out of 10

Artist: La Mojarra
Song: But Beautiful


This is a tough one cause I really like where this COULD have gone. The whole build up of the beginning is really cool and hypnotic. When it eventually reaches the drums, it’s a bit of let down. Not only do the drums sounds like they’re in another room but the whole vibe of the song kinda stagnates. It’s got some really cool elements in it thouhg, just some choices I wouldn’t have made.
Production:5 out of 10
Vocals:n/a
Listenability:5 out of 10
Originality:5.5 out of 10

Artist: Proper Rhymes
Song: Money Ain’t


This sounds like it may have been recorded on Garage band. Which gives it a very “demo tape” charm. The downside is that the music itself isn’t particularly very good so that charm doesn’t carry very far. The rapper can rap well but sounds like he’s reading the words and he’s a bit monotone for my taste. The beat is kinda cheap sounding but , at least, headed in a decent direction.
Production:4 out of 10
Vocals:4.5 out of 10
Listenability:4.5 out of 10
Originality:4 out of 10

So, what do you think?

Answers for questions vol. 221

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Whattup everyone?
So, every now and then, my question box gets low. This is one of those times. I need questions! Time to come out of hiding and let them rip. I’m also in need of new “Ask Dr. Tony” questions, so , anyone looking for advice, I’m your guy.
Send all questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments section below. It’s anonymous and for the love of the sport.
I should also mention, I’ll be doing a Reddit AMA (ask me anything) on thursday. 3pm eastern time. I’ll have more details on that later in the week so check back on my twitter/facebook.
Okaaaaaay? Word.

Do you think the term taking a procreative dump to describe childbirth is too crass?

I’d more say that’s not a term and simply something you made up. Conversely , I’d be curious to know what the equal “term” would be for taking a dump , in comparison to having kids might be. “Dropping the kids off at the pool” is a famous one but maybe we could think of one slightly more poetic. I’m open to suggestions.

If you were to write a self help book, what would you name it? What new and unique idea would be this books selling point?

My self help book would be called “Get over yourself, no one cares” and it would be aimed at people who think that they matter, in the larger scheme of things. People who think the minutia of their dumb lives have any bearing on other people around them whatsoever. This would include chapters on “You and your kids”, “Your relationships” , “Your Job”, etc…
I think the selling point would be to remind people that we are all just grains of sand on a giant beach and, eventually , a wave will come wash us all away. With this in mind, stop being a self righteous dip shit about everything and just live your life…cause , in general, no one gives a shit.

I recently went to one of your shows and thought the visuals were pretty sweet (you had some video footage mirrored across the center). Do you do all of your own visuals? If so, what do you use to make them? How specific are they to the song? Do you make any attempt to sync whats happening on the screen with the changes in the music?
My most recent visuals were made by this dude Big mention out of Wichita , KS. He’s a music and visual artist I met while doing shows. He basically put together all the images, fucks with them, and sends me a DVD. The Images are definitely arranged arbitrarily but I’ve found that that kinda works on a few different levels. Sure, it’s not always gonna make sense with what music is playing at every moment but, being that my set changes show to show, I couldn’t have a definitive visual dvd I tour with.

When you’re playing ball do you allow yourself one wild/forced shot (mine is typically a drive) per game, being that if you make it you’re then granted one (MAYBE two) more? This is extended to all team members.
I mean, bad shots happen. Kinda depends where I land in the pecking order of scorers on whatever team I happen to on.. If I’m one of the top two scorers on the team I’ll most likely be taking more shots. If I’m taking more shots, I may force a few here and there. I’m far more likely , at this point in my life, to force up an ill advised jump shot than do a crazy drive that leads to a circus shot. I simply don’t take it to the hole like that anymore. But , in general, I don’t actively think about getting off a wild shot once a game. If it happens, it happens and I generally end up being like “my bad” to the rest of my team after I miss it.

hey, blockface,

i’m a long time listener, first time colander…

what’s your initial response when you hear the news that some well known rapper has died?

is it any of the following: (?)

1. “thank fuck they’re gone”

2. “i don’t recall ever caring about them”

3. “that name reminds me of a typo i seen on a twitter comment once”

4. “i better paypal some cash to the deceased rappers family member so they can bury him/her”

5. “i haven’t listened to their album since the 80s”

6. somethin else

Depends on the rapper but, generally, i don’t get too sad about the passing of famous people. Unless I know them personally, it’s kinda sad but…you know, shit happens. It really only effects me if it was someone I greatly respected and who was still in their prime. Like when Patrice O’neal died, I was pretty bummed.
I tend to be pretty annoyed by the outpouring of fake digital tears that follow the deaths of famous people. People almost treat some of their deaths like it’s a cause or that it only happened to them. Everyone has to say something or write a long winded facebook post about what that person meant to them. Unless you personally knew the person, I think anything beyond a simple “RIP” isn’t really necessary. But, hey, that’s just me.

Yo Tony, I just did a 2 year prison stint down in Mississippi….it was horrible, considering their judicial system and such, plus most people in the delta are fucking retarded. One of the worst parts of it was missing out on Phatfriend shenanigans! I sincerely missed this shit…..that is until I got a hold of a cell phone, but blogging loses it’s charm when you’re worried about a corrections officer sneakin up and slappin that contraband charge on ya!!

But…i’m out now, and it’s awesome. don’t worry, it wasn’t over anything sketch, just abunch of weed and mushrooms. Have you ever had to deal with corporal punishment?? If you had to go do time for any reason at all, do you think you could handle it? what would you do, you think? Become a born again christian? join a white supremacy gang? sell cigarettes? gamble on basketball games? Play chess? God forbid this ever happens to you, but what do you think you would do in that situation???

Welcome home, bro. That’s ridiculous you did two years over a drug charge but hopefully things are changing for the better where those matters are concerned.
Anyway, I’ve never had any issues with the law. I’ve never been arrested. I’ve always been pretty law abiding but, more so than that, I’ve just been very careful. I don’t know when it got instilled in me but I’ve always done things with the consequences in mind. That’s stopped me from doing all sorts of shit I might have otherwise tried.
If I had to go to jail, I don’t know what would happen. you hear the stories and see the things on tv then assume it’s a constant race war and rape factory. If that’s the reality, I’d imagine I wouldn’t last very long. I’m definitely not a white supremacist and doubt i could even fake that so my only chance for safety would be out the window. I’d like to think I would keep to myself and stay out of the way of everyone. Just try to do my time and quietly as possible. You know, like a real pussy. I 100% would not find god. Perhaps I’d read a lot. I hear people play scrabble in jail , so I’d become part of the scrabble gang.I’m already pretty god at it so maybe those skills would elevate me through the ranks into a boss of the scrabble crew. That or I’d get shanked and murdered the first week. You never know. All the more reason for me to never ever find out. #pussylife is a free life.

Fuck/marry/kill Vol. 41

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It’s a new year and “fuck/Marry/Kill” rolls on. It’s a game you either love or hate. Hopefully, the former.
As always, let me preemptively say this is all for laughs. I don’t really want to kill or marry any of these people. Please try your best to put your self righteous college aged outrage to the side for a moment and just except this for what it is: A dumb joke. We’re all equal. We are all special flowers. Blah blah blah.
On another note, if you have any good ideas for people/things/places I should Fuck/marry/kill, let me have them. Leave them in the comment section below.
Okay, let’s pop it off and remember, it’s all love (kind of).

F/M/K: Sammi Sweetheart, Farrah Abraham, Lauren Conrad

Marry: Lauren Conrad
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Aside from always thinking she was cute, she’s the only one of these three I don’t actively loath. Sure, she’s a made up person from reality TV and is very likely equally awful as the other two rodeo clowns in this selection but, at least from a perspective of how they presented themselves on tv, her worst faults are being dumb and mildly petty. Not ideal wifey material but , let’s be honest, I could do a lot worse too.

Fuck: Sammi Sweetheart
Sammi+Giancola+2010+MTV+Movie+Awards+Arrivals+K290OKemUs4l
Sammi is one the quintessential catholic school girl grown up. She puts sex on a pedestal, for about a week, then gives it up in what I imagine to be the most extreme of ways. Not to be confused with Farrah abraham , who literally gives up the butthole on film, I’m more talking about a passion. She’s all “I’m a good girl, I’m a sweetheart!” but then she goes and has sex with steroid pumped gorillas with no game whatsoever. I don’t know why that makes me pick her for sex and I also realize I’d be the weakest man she had ever let touch her by a long shot but, you know, there’s a challenge in that. Maybe the gentle touch of a weakling is what she’s been waiting for all her life.

Kill:Farrah Abraham
farrah-abraham-2012-vma-pre-party-01
Yes, I’ve seen her porn. It was…umm…graphic. That’s somebodies mother, guys! hahahahaha
This is a case of where the “kill” is actually doing the world a favor. She is possibly one of the least savory human beings to ever throw themselves in front of a camera. Truly awful. She’s also made herself look like deformed joy doll so it’s not like the moral obligation to make her extinct is fighting my dick being like “But she’s hot, bro!”. Nope, this is the rare case of f/m/k where it might actually be justified. Not to be too grim, but there will probably come a time in our life when Farrah Abraham dies prematurely and not even twitter will be able to send condolences with a straight face.

F/M/K: Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy

Fuck: Santa Claus
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Duh. He’s a giver. And not a cheap giver. He gives you whatever you asked for. He will supply a life of joy. Also, he’s thick.
Santa is the ultimate made up guy. He’s like the superman of imaginary friends. He can do anything. It’s almost not fair. Unless you’re a jew…then I suppose marrying Santa might be an issue. I’m only half jewish so I think it would work. Stranger things have happened though.

Fuck: The tooth fairy
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The thing I like about the tooth fairy is that he/she rewards you for your pain and let’s you know that you’re growing up. I remember when my baby teeth would fall out. Some would go easy. Others would hang by a thread for weeks until I had to yank it out with my bare hands and swallow a mouthful of blood. The Tooth fairy understood this pain and , in exchange, left a few quarters. Sure, that’s a bit on the cheap side but when you’re like 4 years old (is that how old you are when teeth fall out?) that might as well be a million dollars. The only downside of the tooth fairy is that, if you think about him/her, it’s some creep with like a million pounds of kids teeth saved up. Which really does sound like some serial killer shit.

Kill: The easter bunny
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The easter bunny is smug. He’s all like “Oh, you want some eggs? Well, I’mma hide them. But first, go to church all morning”. FUCK THAT NOISE. First of all, my dudes santa and the tooth fairy deliver me goods directly to home. Money and gifts. What are you offering me? Some fucking ornate hard boiled eggs? woopty fuckin’-doo. I can go to the corner store and buy like 10 of those for 2 bucks…but I wouldn’t ever do that cause who needs that many hard boiled eggs? The whole “bringing food” thing is suspect to me and can easily go awry. Honestly, if we’re getting food, I’d rather someone bring me a freshly cooked rabbit. That would be delicious.

FMK- in their prime foxy brown, little kim, nicki minaj

Fuck: Nicki Minaj
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Hey, you know what? Nicki Minaj is the hottest. Talk all you want about her fake butt and tits, her poor fashion choices and her annoying voice but, goddamnit, I love her face. She’s like a cartoon in her hotness. My only issue with her would be the reality that I probably could do no damage to her sexually on any level. But it would be my honor to try as hard as I could. Seriously, there aren’t many female rappers I wanna have sex with more than her. Trina in her prime, maybe? That’s it. Nicki is the pinnacle. Also, I hate her music.

Kill: Foxy Brown
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I’ve never for a moment liked Foxy Brown. Musically or physically. Her face always looked like a sea turtle with a stroke to me and she just seemed unclean at all time to me. She even had a great body in her prime but it just never took with me. Did she have a lazy eye? Even if she didn’t, it felt like she did. Maybe cause she looks like forrest whitaker with a vagina.
Anyway, I also despise her rapping. She was corny and had the voice of a male child. That one song where she breaks down the math of selling drugs was a low point in late 90’s rap to me (and that era has LOTS of low points). Foxy has always been just kinda gross to me. It’s an easy choice.

Marry: Lil’ Kim
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In her prime, Lil Kim was adorable. Spunky, cute and a total dirt bag. I don’t know how she transformed into Mr. Mistoffelees from “Cats!” but it’s a bummer to see. Aside from her physical traits, I’ve always felt Kim was one of those extremely loyal ladies as well. She’d have your back. To a fault, even. I bet she put up with some pretty horrendous shit while dating Biggie but she stuck by him…as his ultimate side piece. Well, with me, it would be time for the big leagues. A wedding and all. Also, she’s my favorite rapper of the bunch by far.

F/M/K- Bed Bugs, Cockroaches, Rats!

Fuck: Cockroaches
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This was an awful selection to fuck you to whoever came up with it. Seriously…terrible.
But, if i HAD to pick one of these to fuck, I’mma go with roaches. I don’t like them, but I can live with them. I’ve had variations of them in every house I’ve ever lived in and it’s nothing new. Not on some “Joe’s apartment” shit but , you know, a few here and there. They don’t bother me nearly as much as rats. That’s for sure. So, I’mma throw a good fucking on some roaches.

Kill: Rats!
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Without hesitation. Just googling the word “rats” to find the pic above sent waves of panic through my system. I cannot live around rats. They’re huge, they eat stuff and they can climb walls. unlike roaches, I don’t feel comfortable stomping a rat to death. It might survive the beating and comeback for revenge. Mice, I’m down with, Woulda married them in a heart beat. But rats? DEAD. ALL OF THEM.

Marry: Bed Bugs
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This one is specific to me and I realize, for most people , they’d be the “Kill”. understandably so. They ruin lives. However, there’s a chance I’m not allergic to their bites. I don’t know this for sure but, a while back, some friends and I went to the woods and the hotel we we stayed at had a bed bug problem. Both the people I was with, who stayed in the same hotel as me, got eaten alive. I did not. Granted, i was in a different bed than them but the fact I came out clean either means I’m the luckiest man alive (which is possible) or I’m not effected by bed bug bites. So, there is a strong chance I’m wrong about this and would be entering into a marriage of true despair BUT, if i’m right, i just beat the system. I would be taking these three horrific things and making one a non-factor. It’s really a dice roll but I’m not marrying a fucking rat. EVER.

Family Feud Appreciation

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Family Feud has been on as long as I can remember. I watched it as a kid, I watched it as a teen, I watched in my early 20’s and I watched it last night. That said, I never really gave a shit about. In fact, I never though about it until one day I was at a friends house. This friend was one of those dudes who never had cable. It’s not something I every considered much but only having the basic networks will force a persons hand. He knew about all the judge shows and game shows. He knew when they came on and he knew which ones were worth your time. Without question, Family Feud was hi favorite. He’s spring to his feet to turn it on like “Oh, shit, the feud is on!”. To me, a man who’s had cable forever, I was like “What the fuck are you even babbling about?”. But , after a few rounds, I got it. This was decades ago but it left it’s mark on me for sure.
Let’s be honest, Family Feud is a dumb game show for families. In the past, it was hosted by a variation of smiling men who later would prove to be insanely depressed or crazy. Behind the scenes, there was lots of sadness and despair. A few suicides, Lots of drinking, and even more forced mouth kissing. But this isn’t about that. Admittedly, when those era’s were happening, I wasn’t tuned in much. Same goes for the later “Let’s clean up our image” years, where they got people like Joey Fatone from N’ Sync and the white haired guy from Seinfeld to host. Fuck those years. As far as I’m concerned, Family Feud has two golden eras. The louie Anderson years and the current version with Steve Harvey.
Louie Anderson was a lovable fat comedian who clearly hated himself. He wasn’t pretty to look at and he seemingly didn’t get along with other people. It’s because of this that his seasons were so good. Unlike former hosts who bought a certain sexual energy to the table, Louie bought a eunuch vibe mixed with a man who had clearly thrown in the towel. While this may sound awful in theory, let’s also remember, he was a comedian in 80’s. Those were some dark souls. So, the dynamic of the show was a dark soul dealing with the most wide eyed and stupid families you could find on this planet. In that era, the Feud was noticeably more white. To be honest, the racial element of the feud has become one of it’s greatest assets but I’ll get to that later.
Louie was fun. He was subtly patronizing but kept on his game face enough that it never got fully out of hand. It should also be noted that louie had one of the least “made for tv” voices ever and he was seemingly drunk as fuck very often. Like, he would lean on contestants in order to not fall over. That’s so real.
Louie was great but, as far as I’m concerned, his years were not the golden era. No, we are living in the golden era. The Steve Harvey Era. It shocks me as much as it shocks you. For one, Steve harvey is the worst, right? His stand up is terrible, his movies/books about dating make me wanna castrate myself and bleed all over tyler perry. But, for some reason, his work as the host of Family Feud is flawless. I don’t know if it’s his temperament or his ability to get along with various kinds of people but he is the perfect host. He’s funny and not in a corny way. Like , I actually like him as a person after watching the show. Huge suits and all.
In my eyes, what has made the show so great in it’s newest incarnation is not just Harvey. It’s the guests and the questions. It’s as if Harvey came along and they decided “We should make Family feud a loving and enjoyable race war every week…”. So, where they might have had two Blonde, huge toothed WASPS families named “The smiths” and “The Walters” in 1988, They’ve gone a new , awesome direction. They strictly pull from two pools. The whitest of all white families (no jews allowed) where mothers have names like “pepper” and the god fearing is palpable OR the most amazing southern black families where mothers have names like “Expedition” and the grandma is always the horniest person in the room. Also, lots of god fearing.
They pit these two unfathomably different (yet secretly quite similar) family types against one another and the result is pure bliss. Steve is especially in heaven cause he’s running circles around them. Both family types are dumb enough to make it interesting but just smart enough to drop jewels on occasion.
And the questions! While , back in the day, a question like “Name a type of bird you see in a park” might have been expected, the new version has embraced that viral clips can fuel a fan base. So, they set them up to either mess up or say outlandish shit. Specifically, sexual stuff said by old women or creepy dads. The trolling and baiting is in full effect. Add on Steve Harvey patiently egging them on and you have what is known as TV magic.
So, i would like to honor this unsung hero of game shows today. My hats off to you! Here is a compilation of great moments to bring it all home. God bless you, Steve harvey’s family Feud.

Peep this new song I did with Aesop Rock!

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“When are you and Aesop gonna do more music together?!?!”
“Do you and Aesop Still talk?”
“What can’t you make “Float” Again?”

These are three questions I get all the time. Online. Offline. In line for a bathroom. Well, today is a great day for all those inquiring minds. I recently did a song with Aesop that accompanied the release of a special edition toy he was involved in, made by Kid Robot. A two song 7″ came with the toy and that was the only way you could hear the song…UNTIL NOW!
The good people at Rhymesayers have made the songs available both digitally and as a stand alone 7″. Two songs!
1. Cat food (Produced by me)
2. Bug Zapper (Produced by Aesop)

You can get the vinyl or mp3 here:
http://fifthelementonline.com/collections/aesop-rock/products/aesop-rock-cat-food-ep
You can also get the mp3 in these two well known digital music outlets:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00R57GKAU/ref=sr_1_3_rd?ie=UTF8&child=B00R57HLMQ&qid=1420435172&sr=1-3
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/cat-food-ep/id952773750

Also,
Aesop is on tour right now with Rob sonic and Homeboy Sandman. Peep the dates HERE
I have just been added on to his NYC show and the Gramercy Theater (2/14/15) So, if you’re in the city that night, come nice and early to see me play a little set. It will be valentines day , so, you know. Mad romance. Also, Aesop & rob sonic with Homeboy sandman is seriously one of the best bills you’ll see this year. Don’t miss it where ever they go.

So, to summarize:
1)Aesop and I did a new song together
2)We are still good friends
3)We will never remake “Float”

Sounds good? Great.

Answers for questions vol. 220

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Happy new year! 2015, right? That means we got, what? Like 35-50 more years left? I for one look forward to them.
Anyway, welcome to another edition of answers for questions. You ask, I answer. As always, I’d love you to submit more questions. Get weird! be creative! it’s all anonymous and no one will judge you (except me, if the question is really boring or stupid). Send questions to me at- phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comment section below. I’d love to hear from you.
Let’s see what the new year has in store for us…

Asking someone what or who inspired them always is a stale question. But do you think you inspired other people? Do you think you’d be able to tell? Like if you here someone’s music and think: ‘hey that sounds a bit like me!’ or ‘that guy ripped my shit!’?

I can definitely hear it on occasion. Honestly, more in my “demo reviews” than I do any music I hear on my own. My response is definitely “Hey, that sounds a bit like me!” and not so much “That guy ripped my shit!”. I mean, if i lay claim to being the guy who layers tons of samples, that would cast a pretty big net and also be incredibly ego maniacal on my part. I wasn’t the first and won’t be the last.
That said, I’ve never really seen someone who was inspired by me on a larger level. I know younger , successful artists who have told me they “grew up listening to me” (btw, that’s how you make a person feel very old) but I can’t say I hear a ton of my influence in their music.

I have been reading your blog for sometime now and just wanted to say thanks. Also would like to ask if you had any suggestions as to where one should turn for guidance when they, their family, and friends don’t know any better?
To me, obviously.
Nah, that’s a tough one. Family is one thing. You can’t pick who births you. I know everyone is on some “You only get one family and you should blindly love them” kinda shit but I disagree. Plenty of worthless assholes procreate and , by no means, should anyone feel compelled to follow those types of people. And this is coming from a person with a generally great family.
Your friends, however, are something you can control. If your friends are so shitty that there isn’t a single one you can turn to for help or advice? You need new friends. Or join the army. From the sound of it, you’re living amongst shitheads everywhere you turn. Getting out of that scene would be your best option, if possible.
Maybe get a shrink, if you can afford it.

Do you have any thoughts on the Vice CEO, Shane Smith?
I have mixed feelings about him.
On one hand, when i’ve seen/heard him in interviews, he comes across as a really smart, informative guy who’s lived a fairly crazy life. And, unlike his former partner Gavin Mcguinniss , he hasn’t becomes a crazy person so set in his contrarian ways that he’s now a right ring talking head for fox news (which is really unfortunate cause Mcguiness was one of the funniest dudes ever).
That said, I know a few people who know him (smith) pretty well who have nothing good to say about him. So, while I respect him and think he does some good things, the personal shit I’ve heard about him definitely taints that.

If you had to go on the show Shark Tank tomorrow, and pitch one business idea, what would it be?
Love that show.
I’ve certainly sat around, watching it and thinking of what I could bring to the table. Sadly, I don’t think I have an inventors mind. For one, I don’t know how to “do” anything. So, the technological aspect of creating would end right there. Secondly, I’ve never been a great starting idea guy. I’m much better at taking someone else’s half baked idea and turning it into something much better. In fact, I’d be a great “shark tank consultant”.
But if I had to come up with one pitch?
It’s something I’ve spoke about before (I think on my podcast) but a bed with a built in urinal. Sadly, it only works for men (cause we have dicks) but it would be a way to not have to leave bed and pee, so you can roll over and go right back to sleep. The technology is all out of my realm but , goddamnit, if someone could perfect that, the world would be a better place. The sales to drunks alone would be in the millions.

Which is funnier, “that is as useful as a bag of dicks” or “that is as useful as a bag of smashed buttholes”

I vote for “bag of dicks” only cause it makes more sense. “Smashed buttholes” selling point is that it’s the less common saying, thus it sounds more original when you hear it. But, really, what is a smashed butt hole? In their essence, buttholes are holes. how do you smash a hole? Maybe if it were “torn buttholes” it might make more sense. Or “blown out buttholes”. That said, depending who you are, I’d imagine a bag of dicks might be pretty useful to the right person. A bag of limp dicks…now that would be completely useless.

I have questions concerning Album Artwork. Because I am someone who is paying attention to those things and they are also effecting the way of how I experience music. (Owen Brozman’s Artwork is genuine! I love it, especially “The Music Scene”. Creates a whole new world in my head). How important is that to you and your music. And what is your favorite artwork?

Honestly, when it comes to that kinda shit, I don’t care THAT much. I’ve always been an audio guy as opposed to a visual guy. By that, I mean I don’t sit around agonizing about it and putting a whole lot of thought into it. When it’s time to come up with artwork, I like to get a simple idea and just throw it at the artist. In my case, it’s been Owen Brozman who’s done all the artwork on my last 4 albums. We’re old friends and have a very smooth working relationship. He’s able to hear my idea and make it come to life.
Basically, I let the artist do the work. Cause that’s what he’s good at. I trust him. Sure, I might ask for a change here and there but, for the most part, once I give the most basic idea, I try and step away from it all. I’m definitely not one of those meticulous people who lords over every aspect of my album. I handle the music and everything else gets delegated elsewhere in a fairly casual manner.

Blockhead, what do you think is more offensive behavior – Not letting ppl off the train before getting on or not giving you seat up to elderly ppl

100% not letting people off the train before getting on. While it’s always good to give your seat to an old person, sometimes you aren’t paying attention or there’s no room to move. That’s one of those “It’s the right thing to do” kinda situations but it’s not a rule. Where as people who rush onto a train where people are getting out might has well have been raised by savages in a jungle. Who does that? Not only is it rude but it makes no kind of sense. People get off and make room for people getting on. When you cross those streams, you’re fucking up the flow for everyone.
Not giving your seat up to an elderly person isn’t great etiquette but, at the same time, there is an element of “I was here first” when it comes to seats in the subway. Especially if you have a long ass ride ahead of you. I’m not saying it’s okay, but it’s nowhere near the foul that barging on to an emptying train is.

Resolutions and reality

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I don’t think I’ve ever made a new years resolution. I’ve never been one for promises I can’t keep and I also know myself well enough to know that I’m full of shit.
As the new year rolled in, timelines on all the social networks began to fill with stunted words of wisdom, spiritual banalities and people speaking on all the ways they’re gonna change their lives in 2015. One day ago, they were smoking a pack a day, burning bridges and cheating on their wives but now we gotta write a different year on a check,so it’s gonna change. No doubt. I’ve long thought that people don’t change as much as they evolve. My this, I mean if you’re a selfish asshole at 20 years old, you’ll still be a selfish asshole at 40. Just a more refined and sharpened version of the one you used to be. Obviously, this theory isn’t a fact and there are plenty of cases you’re probably coming up with in your head that might disprove it. But, in general, I truly believe it (but recognize there are exceptions to all rules).
Anyway, as it is the second day of a new year, I wanted to look at some common resolutions and the reality of those resolutions. In many ways, we are the only people that can better ourselves. A clock turning 12 does not have any bearing on you and you’re personal faults.
So, let’s look at 5 common resolutions and their realities.

Resolution 1: I’m gonna start working out
Reality: I’m gonna join a gym. I’ll start at the weights and tell myself “once I get my wind back, I’ll get a personal trainer” but weights are heavy and my shoulders hurt. Holy shit, I’m sore. So, maybe I’ll just go run on the machines. I’ll try the treadmill and maybe run half a mile at a brisk pace, then get bored and try the stationary bikes. Wow, even more boring. The elliptical looks like way to many pieces moving at once and that scares me. Back the tread mill to walk at a slight incline at about 2.8 mph while listening to a podcast. Wow, these locker rooms are disgusting. I just way an old man sit on his balls. I do this routine maybe twice then slowly make excuses why I can’t make the gym. Turns out exercising is both really hard and tedious. No wonder I never do it. I remain a member of the gym for 6 months but cancel my membership once summer rolls around cause “I’m gonna be outdoors a lot anyway”.

Resolution 2: I’m gonna quit smoking
Reality: January 1st…not one cigarette. Feeling great. I miss it but I can do this. A few days pass, feeling the itch pretty heavy but holding strong. I go out and grab a meal and some drinks with friends. Actively trying to not think about how good that cigarette would be right now. A few drinks later, fuck it. I can have just one. I smoke a cigarette but make a deal with myself that, as long as I don’t buy a pack, I’m still okay with this. I bum like 6 cigarettes that night from my friends. Wake up the next day feeling the shame. Get back on the horse. Fall right back off the horse a few days later. This back and forth continues for a little while till I eventually come to terms that I’m not ready to quit. I promise myself I’ll do it next year as I buy myself a pack.

Resolution 3: Be a nicer person
Reality: I do my best to listen to people and not just hear them. I try to be gracious to talk to people, instead of at them. I try not to judge people too quickly or make rude comments for no reason.
Oh wait, I’m an asshole. This is impossible.

Resolution 4: Be on time from now on!
Reality: The first week, i set serious time goals. I’m hyper aware of when I must arrive places and very cued in to how long getting somewhere might take. I add on “just in case” travel time that will help me not get set back by things I can’t control. It’s going great for a week. I’ve been early to work for the whole week and I feel good about this. I make plans to go meet some friends out. They are gonna be there around 10. Around 10? Hmm…no rush. I show up at 11:30. Whatever…it wasn’t that important and no one cared. Next week, I’m showing up to work right on time. I’d be early but it’s getting kinda cold out and my bed is really comfortable. Next week, I tell a friend I’ll meet them to see a movie. The movie is at 8 but we should get there at 7:30 so we can make sure it doesn’t sell out. I’m about to leave my place but get caught up in the end of this CSI episode. Oops. I arrive at 7:55 and the movie is sold out. My bad! Won’t happen again. Next week, I’m coming into work about 5-10 minutes late every day. By this time, I have forgotten I ever even made this stupid resolution so, see you next year!

Resolution 5: Be more caring to people who are less fortunate
Right off the bat, I donate some money to a cause. So, good start. I also gave that homeless guy on my block my leftovers. He asked what it was and if it had dairy in it. It did. Hope he’s not lactose intolerant! I go on the internet and look into possibly helping at a soup kitchen sometime. Maybe do some work with kids in halfway homes. Take a few notes of possible places I can work in. Put that not on a desk or table somewhere. oh wait, where’s I put that? Shit…it’s lost. Oh well, I can just go back online. I’ll do that later. Masterchef is on. I don’t do that later and never find that piece of paper. Cleaning lady must have thrown it out. Whatever, I donated money. That’s more than most people can say. Man, this wine is good. what was I talking about? I forget. God, I love wine.

But, hey…maybe you’re one of the exceptions. If you’ve made a new years resolution and truly tend to stick by it, I salute you. You’re a better man/woman than me. If it doesn’t work out though, don’t feel bad. New years resolutions are bullshit anyway. If you really wanna change , it shouldn’t depend on a roman calendar’s page flipping. You can always try again in june. Happy new year.