Questions for answers Vol.. 283

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Hi there everyone.
How you been? i’ve been traveling so this is the first time I’ve had a chance to write anything for this blog in a week. You know how that shit go…
Anyway, this is answers for questions. You ask me stuff and I answer it. You got a questions you wanna ask me? Go nuts. Get weird. be inventive. Send it to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave it in the comment section. I’m always taking submissions so don’t hesitate.
Okay, let’s see this weeks batch…it’s an interesting one.

Good idea or a bad one?
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/09/14/1410717265818_wps_2_Some_places_have_lanes_fo.jpg

Fucking brilliant idea.
You know, walking with your head down , buried in your phone, is one of those things I both detest but , shamefully, will sometimes do. I try my best to not do it. I’ll often stop walking and step to the side just to make sure I don’t do it but nobodies perfect…it happens. The two lane sidewalk thing would fix all of that. In general, I feel we need two lanes for slow walkers who are just floating through life not giving a fuck about other peoples time and space so, yeah, I’m all in on this one. Thank you, China.

Would you rather get a kick in the dick every week for a year straight or never take a nap again in your life?
Oh faithful reader, you thought you had a good one here but you were mistaken.
Without question, I chose the latter. Why, you ask? CAUSE I CAN’T NAP ANYWAY.
Yup, I never nap. Ever. I have a serious problem falling asleep during the day and, at best, I can shut my eyes for a few hours but still be kind of awake. It’s a struggle and I’m certainly jealous of people who have that life skill but this may be the one situations where it actually feels like an advantage for me. You’re basically asking “Would you rather get kicked in the dick every week for a year or continue living your life exactly as it is?”. I think the answer is clear.

When did you know you were straight? Hetero. Serious question.
I mean, everybody at SOME point has probably been like “Hey that guy is really attractive… do I… ? Am I… should I try…?” and then either tried it and realized (either way), or just KNEW. What’s your story?

I don’t think I ever questioned it that deeply. When I came of age where I started being attracted to girls, I was straight. So, I guess I just knew. At the same time, being straight doesn’t mean I can’t look at a dude and recognize he’s good looking. The two things are not mutual at all. Now, if I look at that same guy and think “He’s a good looking guy…I wonder what it would be like to make out with him?” that’s something different but, for me, it was always like “Yup, that guy looks like he probably gets a ton of pussy”.
Also, when I say I never though about it, that’s a generational thing. Sexual identity wasn’t the same as it is today. When i hear high school/college kids talk about their sexual identity today, it blows my mind. It’s as if simply being a straight dude is looked upon as boring and lame. Like I’ve heard all these caveats like “Well, I identify as straight but I have bi sexual leanings and I’m sapiosexual” and that’s coming out the mouth of a fucking 16 year old. My generation simply wasn’t concerned/aware of those kinda of things. Granted, being a gay kid back then was also probably a nightmare so it’s not a bad thing that the tides have turned. But there is a part of me that feels a lot of these kids don’t really know what they are yet and are just saying whatever they feel is cool. I’m very happy that people have more freedom now to live as they want to but teenagers are still teenagers and, you know, teenagers are stupid and full of shit in general. Not their fault though…they’re teenagers.

I don’t know if you already wrote about friendzone but I ask you this: Is it possible to get out of the friendzone or we friendzoned guys are condamned to ethernity?

Is it possible? Sure. “anything is possible”. I’ve had sex with girls I was friendzoned by and it was always a mess afterwards. Like, it finally happens and you’re all excited but, at that point, you’re no longer obsessing over it like you were back when you were locked in that box. It also generally happens after the crush has waned. Like, if a girl seriously has you in the friendzone, you’re not gonna get out of it anytime soon. She’s made the decision that that’s where you stand with her and nothing you can do will change that. Only time can shift things. Not to mention, when it happened to me, I felt pangs of resentment towards the girl after like “Oh, NOW it’s okay?” Which is ridiculous but I was also pretty young and petty so I suppose it goes with the territory.
So, yeah, you could get out but , chances are if you’re really there, by the time you get out, it won’t matter much to you anyway. I guess you could call it bad timing.

You’re a guy who loves food. What are some of your go-to items? What ethnic/regional cuisines are your favorites, and which ones can you not get down with? Are you mainly a meat entree kinda guy, or do you have some favorite vegetarian dishes too?

I do love food and I pretty much eat it all. I am a meat guy and , in general, my main dish will include some sort of dead animal in it. beef and lamb are my go to but I also love pork and chicken so I tend to keep it pretty versatile when ordering meals.
As for ethnic/regional…I eat tons of middle eastern food, japanese, italian, etc…There’s very few regions I don’t like. One thing I’m not crazy about is Thai food. I mean, it’s good and I’ll eat it no problem but it’s definitely never something I seek out. I’m not a huge fan of mixing sweet with meats and I also have a cap on how spicy I can take food so Thai food often kinda plays into my disinterests.
I don’t generally eat anything specifically vegetarian but I do like veggies…especially when they’re next to some meat.

I had a strong experience with your music last night. What did you do this weekend?


Well, I’m sitting in a hotel in montreal right now writing this. I played shows with Eliot Lipp in NYC and Burlington this weekend. I’m tired, mildly hungover and regretting that 3 am kabab I had last night.
Today, we drive back to NYC then head down south to finish our tour dates for this week. Moving and shaking, brah.

Whats the most unpleasant interaction you’v had with another celebrity?
Probably the time marky mark spat in my mouth while we were kissing.
Just kidding.
Hmm…lemme think. I honestly have never been one to try and talk to famous people. My early experiences with it were such that I think I learned that some famous people are assholes/don’t wanna be bothered. I’ve never had a celebrity flat out do anything awful to me. Steve Guttenberg once played out me and my friends outside a club in the mid 90’s but that was actually awesome. We were clowning him cause, well, he was Steve guttenberg but then he walked by us and a girl asked him what he was doing. he looked at us and said “I think I’m gonna hang with these guys!” then laughed and got into a limo with 4 models. He shut us right the fuck up.

The only unpleasant experience I can think of is one I’ve mentioned here before…but I met Q-tip on the street when I was like 15. He wasn’t even famous yet. This was before “Low end Theory” had even dropped. My friend and I went up to him and he gave me the most “yeah whatever son…” pound I’ve ever had in my life. It was just super dismissive and made me feel like shit for even saying a word to him. But that’s as bad as it’s been. Th secret is to not put yourself out there too much for celebrities cause, in general, they don’t give a fuck about meeting you and that is how you taint your idealized version of your heroes.

Would you rather have sex with a mermaid or a reverse-mermaid?
I suppose it depends what the head game is like, right? i can’t exactly bone some gills.
At the same time, as much as I like a beautiful ass, I doubt I would be into boning one connected to a fish head. I’mma take the normal mermaid just cause the other way would be to weird.

Answers for Questions vol. 282

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Sup yo.
Welcome to another edition of “Answers for Questions”. you guys ask, i answer. I can always use more questions so don’t be shy. Fire away. Send any questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comment section below. Be weird. Be creative. It helps make this column more readable.

Also, I will be heading out on tour tomorrow with Eliot Lipp. East coast, west coast and some southern dates as well. For more info on that, here are the dates in one nifty flyer:
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It also means I’ll be slacking on this blog for a few weeks so, you know, if that’s the type of shit you care about…my bad, b. Duty calls. hopefully I’ll find time to fire off a few updates a week but who knows?

I am in the worst fucking female slump in my life. Real shit, I’m either getting no love, or it’s some lead you on/bait and switch bullshit. My question is, have you ever been in an extended slump with the ladies, and if so, how did you get out of it?

I’ve had one truly long slump in my adult life (6 months) and it was due to me trying to get over a girl. So, in a way, it was self imposed. At first is was me not even trying and having no interest but, as that part waned, I just found myself out of synch in general, when it came to meeting girls. During that time, I must have been emanating “loser”. It was in my 20’s and it was like a perfect storm of no pussy. My ex deaded me. All my regular hook ups got boyfriends. All my friends were in relationships and the internet was not what it is today. It seemed hopeless. I’d like to say there was something I specifically did to get me out of it but that’s not true. Truth is, I met a girl who was down to hook up with me and I hooked up with her. There was no pep talk or self help maneuver. It simply finally happened. i will say this though…getting that action put me right back in the game. Like, that following week, the flood gates burst open and it was like a whole new ballgame. It’s funny to think about cause the scent of desperation must really be a real thing to girls. I think the best way to get out of a slump is cross your fingers and hope you find a girl with a shitty sense of smell.

How do you keep from eating terribly while on tour? I imagine it is easy to get fat living that lifestyle.
I don’t…i eat like shit on tour. Especially if I’m flying a lot. My recent tour in europe had me having a meal a day in an airport for 10 days. You where it’s hard to eat healthy? Airports. Especially when you lack any self control and figure “eh, fuck it…” when deciding on meals. Sure, i could get a gross airport salad and a banana for lunch but…fuck that…I’m eating another burger cause it’s there and being in a airport is torture enough.
I’ve been on some tours where you eat healthier than others. Tours that are driven definitely make that possible. Stops at whole foods and all that shit. It also depends where you’re touring. Down south or the midwest is always gonna be harder to find healthy food that isn’t gross while touring the coasts are a little easier.
In general, I just try to eat GOOD food. I love food more than…well…anything…so, when I’m in a city, i want to eat a good version of whatever that city is known for. BBQ, Sushi, a local sandwich, etc…
It’s not healthy but neither is being sad cause you’re hungry all day. That said, it is a wonder i’m not the fattest man on earth at this point.

Do guys really cum in to gym socks, then keep those socks around under their bed so they can use them again later? Or is that just a thing from the movies? Why? Doesn’t this cause more problems than it solves? Soooo gross!

I’ve never done that in my life cause I’m not a savage. More than that, i’m aware of these things called “tissues”. They’re great. It’s , soft, thin paper made for collecting unwanted fluids from the human body. They even can be flushed down the toilet. It’s truly a great time to be alive during a time when tissues are available to wipe cum off of things with.
I’m sure some people bust nuts in socks. Seems like some shit you do when you’re in high school, disgusting and too lazy to simply not cum in a sock. That was never my bag though .

Do you think that Common & Laura Dern are really dating or is this just a baseless rumor? I hope it’s true haha.


What? Is that true? I haven’t seen a thing about it but, judging from Commons choice in pants the last 5 years, it’s totally plausible.

How do you view the impact that soundcloud has had on the music industry? Both as a musician who posts new content and as a listener who is able to connect with fans of music you like yourself. Do you find that you are better able to reach prospective fans, or do you think it promotes a sort of “tunnel vision” sequestering you to a specific genre of both music and people?

As an artist, I have no problem with Soundcloud. I wish I had made a profile sooner, to be honest. It’s simply a great way to share music. It also is cool cause sometimes you need a platform to just put random shit out. Not things you wanna sell or not full albums. Just a song or remix here and there to keep fans paying attention between projects. Gotta keep them appetites whet.
As a fan, I love it cause many of the artists I fuck with are fairly obscure but have soundcloud pages they are diligent about. So, i get to hear new music by artists I like all the time. That’s a pretty cool concept, compared to the days of simply waiting on albums or guest appearances.
The music industry is so far beyond a point where sales matter that a site like soundcloud isn’t hurting anyone. It’s promotion. There are tons of artists who got a name off of there and now have sustainable careers.
As for the “Tunnel vision” point, I don’t quite understand. There are all sorts of artists on there. Every type of music. If you wanna find some polka on soundcloud, you can. If you want norwegian death metal, it’s there too. So, really, it doesn’t promote tunnel vision at all. That’s entirely up to the person using it.

I don’t watch reality television (it just isn’t something I find very interesting), so I’m in no position to assess them, but after x-number of years being on tv, there are still people who incessantly bash on the Kardashians. I’m wondering what you think of people who shit on the Kardashians as if they murder babies for a living?

Here’s the thing about the kardashians…they are awful. Like, really…with the exception of Khloe, they all just seem like despicable , vapid human beings who are a glaring example of many of the things wrong with american culture. So, i get why people have such vitriol towards them. That said…it’s out fault they’re successful so , perhaps, we should look inward a little and take some of the blame. No one makes people watch that show, buy their products and put money in their pockets. If people stopped caring, they would go away. Like, when’s the last time you saw paris hilton on TV? Sure, she’s still rich but no one is giving her money for being on TV at this point. For every kardashian, there’s some other person just like them who didn’t blow up. Like that weird blonde teenager who married that old dude then got a few shows on VH1. She’s basically doing porn at this point cause people care so little and she needs to make money. That could have easily been Kim Kardashian but it wasn’t…So here we are. Well done, guys!


Hey Block, big fan here. Do you spend much time pondering some of the bigger questions in life? Such as: why are we here? how did existence come to be? does anything matter?

Never. Like, literally, not ever. What’s the point? I don’t have an answer. No one does. I try not to spend time thinking about things of that nature that I have no control over. To be honest, I’m not even curious. We’e born, we live, we die. That’s about it. Sure, we’re all beings and have our own minds. We live our lives differently etc…but why are we here? Cause our parents fucked…and their parents fucked…and their parents fucked X100000000.
Instead of worrying about that kinda shit, I’d rather just try and be a decent person while I’m here. It’s really that simple.

Answers for Questions vol. 281

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Howdy yall, I’m back from an interesting weekend in Miami. Did a show at a festival and got offered DMT like 5 times. I politely declined cause, well, I’m old and not trying to do DMT anywhere, let alone with a bunch of random 20 year olds at a music festival. But, the thought as appreciated guys! It’s just not my thing.
Anyway, this Answers for Questions. You ask, I answer. I’m always in need of more questions so think of something weird and fire away. Send them to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or leave them in the comments below. Be creative. We’re 281 volumes deep here. Time to go off the script, if you know what I mean.
Okay, let’s check this weeks batch…

Say you think of all the people you’ve had sex with in your life. If you had never known any of them and had to go by a picture only, which % of them do you think you would swipe-left versus swipe-right? (does this question make sense??)
This is such a good question and one I have thought about a lot since joining tinder last year.
Here’s the thing, the nuances of attraction are often lost on tinder. Some girls will look amazing on there then be mediocre in real life while some look “meh” on there and then you see them in person are are shocked. There’s no telling these days. But, if I’m going off of just pictures of girls I’ve slept with in my entire life…I’d say I woulda swiped about 75% of the girls I’ve actually slept with. Funny thing is, there are a few in that 25% that I’d probably consider the hottest I’ve ever had but they just weren’t that photogenic or their attractiveness didn’t translate as much on film as it does in person. I mean, there are just some people you meet that you’re overwhelmingly attracted to. They don’t even need to be traditionally hot but they have “something”. A twinkle or maybe just pheromones. At the same time, an obviously pretty girl can become unattractive easily just by being lame or shitty. It works both ways.

People probably try to shake your hand or give you a dap at shows. Have you every been in a situation where you had major reservations about any individuals? Maybe you actually see them do something gross with their hands, or you just get a bad feeling about it, like you don’t know where they’ve been?

What do you think about the handshake custom? Is it good, or should we have already evolved to something better?

Nah, I haven’t had that Larry David moment where I see someone pick their nose then extend their hand to me. I will say that, after a show, where many hands have been shaken, I come back to the hotel and wash my hands. When that happens, I’m appalled but the dark shade of water I see being rinsed off onto the sink. People are filthy. I’m glad I’m not one of those purell addicted OCD types but I definitely try and not put my hands near my eyes or mouth until I’ve washed them, if I’ve been shaken random peoples hands.
As for the handshake custom, I think it’s a good greeting. Only thing is , every region has their own version. Out west the do the slap and bump. Out east , we give pounds. Middle america is a total dice roll. I never know what to expect so I’m often just opting for the proper old timey hand shake so there’s no confusion. If I had a dollar for every fist bump I’ve accidentally left hanging , I’d be rich enough to retire. I almost feel bad about it and never do it on purpose but, at the same time, I think the fist bump is corny in general so maybe I do do it on purpose.

What do you think about rappers rapping over vocal tracks on every single song when they play live? How is that acceptable for every song? Probably the worst offenders I have seen are LA The Darkman (he said his laptop was lost on the plane so he had to use a CD), Vince Staples (no excuse), Future (no excuse).

What about rappers lip synching? My friend made me watch a Tech N9ne DVD once, and I swear he was actually lip synching half the time. What’s up with that?

I think it’s pretty fucking lazy. We live in an era where making an instrumental version of your song should be a given. I know that Tyler the creator was the first guy I saw do it but I also think , at that time, he literally didn’t have foresight to think he’d ever perform those songs live so he didn’t make instrumental versions. I’m sure he does now. But dudes like Future? Come on man. You’re the biggest rapper on earth right now, surely someone got the instrumental tracks for you.
I’ve never seen lip syncing rapper before and I’ve heard Tech 9 is actually impressive live so perhaps he was so good , you assumed he was lip syncing? Cause dude is kind of a brilliant technical rapper.

I just remembered something from like 10 years ago. I was at a party and said something in conversation about a David Bowie song which I think is dope. Some other guy there who I wasn’t even talking to started popping off shit about David Bowie’s personal life and told me that I like “faggot music”. It seemed like they wanted to fight me for a minute, then they left the room just to get away from me like I had the flu or something.

When is the last time someone in real life ever sincerely talked shit to you about your taste in music? How can you even react to this?

I talk about my taste in music all the time. Definitely haven’t had someone tell me some shit I like is “faggot music” ever really. That dude seemed a touch, I dunno, misguided?
The only time I talk about music and get backlash in on here and twitter and, even then, I truly don’t take anything people say to me about it. I have a more, confident and snobby “get on my level” take on it. Like “Oh, these dudes are still into boring boom bap revivalist rap? Okay then…”.
But in real life? I don’t find many people talking shit to me about music taste…cause i got good taste! hahaha

If you had to play a song repeatedly for your neighbors to hear over and over and over again, which song would you choose?
I have one neighbor who blasts music all fucking day long. It’s a mix between gay dance music (he’s a gay dancer) and salsa (he’s latino). But it’s relentless and it’s literally never been a song I like ever. There was one point where it got so bad (music blasting from 9 am on a saturday until 2 am that night) where I got fed up and just put on a playlist of old gangsta rap, put my speakers up to his wall , blasted it and left my house. It was on for about 5 hours and when I got back, it was silent. He didn’t play shit the rest of that day. So, i felt a small victory. So, I guess my answer would be “Goin out like A G.O.” by the geto boys cause that’s what I set the playlist off with. That era of rap doesn’t have much low end to rattle the room but it’s got those mid frequencies that will seep through and get truly grating after a while.

Have you ever wiped your ass with your non-dominant hand? If not, are you willing to try? The reason I ask is because my friends have not tried it yet I feel as though it’s an experience. I recommended it to them and they refused. Who is at fault here?
Little know fact: I don’t wipe at all.
Just kidding.
Umm…i have actually done this when I had an injured right hand. Much like jerking off with your non-dominant hand it was a struggle. If truly does feel like someone else is wiping your ass, while your hand feels like it’s wiping a strangers ass. Not the most dope combo of sensations. When I did it, I was very careful and probably less thorough than I normally would be…but it got the job done.
Who’s at fault? No one. Why wipe with your off hand when you have a perfectly functional hand that you can trust? If it’s “for the experience” of it, I suppose but do we really need to experience that? it’s cleaning your asshole. Not exactly something you sit and savor. People climb mountains and go sky diving for the “experience”. Wiping your ass with your off hand isn’t exactly living life to the fullest.

In the last few months I’ve been interested, but mostly concerned with different examples of “Mandela Effects.” Most notably, my reality was kinda fucked when I learned that a personal childhood book series favorite, the BerenstEin Bears is actually spelled “BerenstAin Bears.” I’m kind of leaning towards dimensional timeline shifts and what not. Like it fucks me up some times and I have to get drunk. I peeped out some other examples that resonated with me but I’m mainly trippin on the Bears. I know you’re the level headed type.You familiar with this sort of shit? Do you even give a fuck? Thoughts, theories, fears, remedies?

I am the level headed type so it’s impossible for me to give a shit about any of these things. I’m also someone who’s a lazy speller so hearing the correct spelling for the “Berenstain bears” did nothing for me. I too thought they were a family of jewish bears but, hey, i guess not. My childhood is still intact despite this mild spelling issue. It’s not like we all just found out “Winnie the Pooh” was actually “Winnie the wet dump”. That would be a mind blower.
I’ll be honest, when the who B. Bears thing was unleashed I had no fucking clue what people were talking about it. I read an article and still didn’t get it. Seemed to me that people just kinda clung onto the relevance of the story cause it had to do with their childhood but, in reality, it was a spelling guffaw. Who cares?

Answers for Questions vol. 280

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Hi there and welcome to answers for questions. You ask’em, I answer them. So very simple. If you have any questions you’d like to ask me, fire away. Email them to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or just leave them in the comment section of this post. Be creative. Be weird. Think outside the box cause, I can assure you, I’ve answered “What inspires you?” and “What kinda sampler do you use?” a billion times.
This weeks batch is primarily from one guy. One sick in the head guy who likes to make ma answer fucked up questions. But, hey, that’s why we are here…so I salute him.

How many 7 year olds do you think you could take in a fight at once?
Hmm…depends on how vicious they were. Like, If I picked the fight and was in control of the situation, I bet I could take about 6 or 7 of them but if they all came at me , specifically to end me, maybe 4?
Also, are these big kids or maybe some malnourished children? All these things come into play.

If you could only eat meat from one animal for the rest of your life, which are you going with?
I’ve thought about this question before and I really can’t ever commit to an answer. Pig or cow. I always lean towards cow but then I think about pork ribs and bacon. But, you know what, time to man up. I say cow. I guess it’s got a wider variety of options and , really, few things are better than a good steak.

How much would someone have to pay you to go an entire year with no internet or TV?
A shit ton of money. I don’t think I could even function in life without the internet. Like, my job depends on it. Emails, sending files, promoting my music, etc…
If I did it, it would basically be career suicide so I’d need enough money to live off of for the rest of my life. Millions and millions of dollars.

Same question as above, but to live in a cabin with no electricity or running water? You’ve got enough food/water for the year, and it’s warm enough that you won’t freeze, but you have nothing else.

Millions and millions of dollars, again. Here’s the thing, I’m a man of comfort. I will let a crowded train pass if it means I can get a seat on the next one. I will fly into a city a day early if it means not having to take an early flight instead the following day. Taking money for living in hell for a year just isn’t worth it to me. We only get so much time on this planet and throwing away a year of my life to live like caveman? Fuck that. Money is great but I’ll take my current situation and financial status over that every time.

If you went to jail, would you kill a pedophile to keep from being raped if you had to chose one of the two?
If those are my only choices? Probably gonna have to dead the kiddie diddler. On paper, I’d say yes but the reality of actually murdering someone might not be in my DNA. Like, I don’t even like killing mice, let alone another human. That said, I also probably REALLY wouldn’t like being raped (Just an assumption, but a fair guess) so , hey, you gotta do what you gotta do. At least it would be a pedophile and I would have some sort of rational to that.

Forced to chose at gunpoint, would you punch a 10 year old girl in the face full strength, or drown the world’s cutest puppy?
I’m a “human first” person so I would reluctantly go with drowning the puppy. I realize that my punch wouldn’t kill the little girl but I couldn’t do that to a child of any sort. The puppy drowning would be awful and probably scar me for life but I could move on from that eventually. Replace “puppy” with “cat” though and WHERE DO I SIGN UP?!?! Your questions are fucking demented , dude.

If you had to fuck a non human, what animal would you choose?
Probably that dead puppy I just drowned. Just kidding.
I mean, I suppose a really pretty monkey would be the closest things right? I feel like I’ve answered this question before and said some huge animal that wouldn’t even feel me inside of them but, thinking about that now, then it would take forever for me to finish. I’d need an animal that I could get in and out real quick to make the experience as quick as possible.

What are some of you favorite comedy movies?


Oh, hey, whattup boring ass question!
I’ll forgo the obvious step brothers, apatow and borat kinda movies.
Some of my low key favorite funny movies are Macgruber (possibly the best film ever made), Team america, The Gentleman Broncos, The wolf of Wall street is a genuinely amazing comedy film. A lot of the christopher guest movies. Gremlins 2L the new batch. Umm…I dunno…i’m going blank on others. There are plenty of old movies I loved but I feel as though they haven’t aged well. Like, Revenge of the nerds was my shit but I doubt it holds up that well now.

Do you like music by many artists that are openly homosexual or who many people assume are homosexual? If so, which artists? Why do some people get so hung up on this type of shit when it comes to their own musical taste?
I don’t think about that…ever. If an artist is gay why would I give a shit in terms of how it effects they music they make. Anyone who cares about that is a fucking moron.
As for gay artists, shit, I dunno…Like I liked Queen. I think Elton John has some good songs. MC lyte has some joints. I can’t say there is an openly gay artist that I think it’s my favorite but there are plenty of gay musicians who make great music.

Answers for Questions vol. 279

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I just slept for 13 straight hours after getting back from europe and only sleep 7 hours over the course of 3 days. 13 fucking hours. Holy shit. I needed it. Thanks to all of you who came out. The shows were awesome. so much love and the turnouts were great as well. If we took pics together post them on my facebook wall and join the ever growing bock of people with me at shows: https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.570798189621477.1073741830.135369443164356&type=3
Annnyway, this is Answers for questions. If you’d like to join the fun, send me questions! either email them to me at phatfriendblog@gmail.com or simply leave them in the comment section. Go nuts. be weird.
Now, lemme wipe the eye boogers away and get to this weeks batch.

You’ve touched on this subject in some ways before, but I’m really interested in what you think of what’s being called the ‘outrage culture’? It seems like anytime anyone posts anything on social media these days, it’s about what they’re pissed off about or what in their opinion is wrong with the world. Like with all things, there’s a positive and a negative impact of such a phenomenon. The positive being that this general outrage could be the motivator for big changes, and maybe it’s what the world has needed all along. The negative is that the internet is just full of noise of everyone sharing their opinions, and nobody really taking actions beyond letting everyone know what they’re mad about. What do you think of this change? Have people always been this way, and the internet is just now giving them a voice? Or, are pissed off people influencing more and more people to be pissed off about stuff?

It’s a mixed bag of good and bad. I’m glad people who would normally not have a voice are now allowed to speak and people are actually listening. That said, the majority of this “outrage” is generally petty bullshit aimed at jokes. People getting mad at jokes , to me, is the biggest waste of time on the planet. I mean, a week rarely goes by where I don’t tweet something then erase it cause I worry about the backlash it might cause. AND I’M ME! imagine if I were a comedian. The outrage culture has entitled everyone to mold the way they hear and see things into their own little ideal world. Everything is a trigger warning. Basically, our ego’s are being coddled at all times and it’s only making us weaker as people. It’s being done for a greater good but I don’t necessarily think that’s a good things. I think allowing people to think every thing they do is “great!” all the time and trying to make us all think “we’re all exactly the same deep down!” is hazardous. Cause, well, not everyone is great. Not every voice needs to be heard. Do you know how many people are fucking idiots? MOST OF THEM. The internet has allowed those fucking morons to have as much of a voice about things they know nothing about as people who are actually educated in those fields. Also, we aren’t all the same. As much as someone would like to tie a bow on america and make it seem like it’s a happy like country where everyone agree on things like sexual politics, racial issues , etc…those things aren’t going away. I’m obviously on the far left life of those issues but I’m also from a major city and was raised to be like that. Not exactly the norm of america society.
My feeling about the outrage culture is everyone thinks they matter. They don’t. Everyone has an opinion. They do. But if Janis dumbfuck from “little shittzville” middle america watches Beyonce at the super bowl and somehow is offended by a musical performance…that’s janis’s problem. it shouldn’t be ours. Back in the day, she would write a letter to the tv station that would end up where it belongs, in a pile that no one cared about. Real revolutions could be taking place right now. A massive changing of how we think but “outrage” over entertainment? Suck my dick. I don’t wanna hear. That said, you have all the right in the world to feel that way. the media just has to stop giving any weight to every person who get upset about some banal bullshit. Good luck with allllll that though cause this stuff is only getting worse. Orwells 1984 is not to far away. Word policing is already here. I’m just waiting for the all grey outfits and the screens with john hurts face on it telling me to keep walking.

you’ve written several times about weird and uncomfortable interactions w fans at shows. but have you ever had a blog reader get too familiar? like submit questions for answers and ask for dr. tony advice and submit demos and leave comments and constantly tweet at you? if you didn’t keep submissions anonymous, would it expose any phat friend stans? this is my 4th or 5th question for answer, but i’ve never done any of the other stuff. do i qualify as a phat friend stan?

I don’t look at them as phat friend stans. they’re just regular readers. In general, I appreciate them cause they keep asking me questions that leads to me having content. In most cases, they’re good natured and “get it” so it’s not a problem. I got a few people who constantly comment on my facebook wall though that I feel are completely insane. They legit worry me. Their comments are generally off base and just seem slightly deranged. I also a have a few people who tweet gibbersih at me with some regularity but i don’t really pay them any mind. Most cause , well, how can i respond to gibberish?

What are your thoughts on people being “addicted” to their devices? I don’t see the problem as long as an individual knows when to stop staring at the screen and give their attention where it’s required.

Also, is wu tang really for the children?

Definitely have been accused of this. I have this OCD thing where if I have an alert, I gotta get rid of it. So, If I’m at a dinner and I see a text pop up, I legit have to fight myself to not check it. God forbid it’s a group text that has like 5 people rattling off texts a million a minute. I have literally had to mute conversations just so I could get through a meal cause, if I don’t, i will lose my mind and just check every vibration my phone sends me. It’s bad.
I think, in general, we are all pretty bad about this. I can complain all day about dudes walking and texting, blocking up the street but I’d be lying if I said it hadn’t been me before. We are a phone obsessed culture. That’s why out parents look at us with such disgust cause they JUST missed the boat on that and truly don’t get it.
Wu tung isn’t really for the children. Unless you want your kid knowing that ghostface’s dick is “thick like a great adventure cigar”.

Have you seen “The Breaks” ? I thought it was really good!
I watched it. It was cute. I think the thing that impressed me most was the music selection. They dug WAY deeper than I expected. It wasn’t a new story and had similar issues other shows/movies about that era had had (trying to fit too much shit in and cover too many bases. having to have a down”white guy” as an integral part of the story) but I wasn’t mad at it. Sure, I coulda live tweeted it and clowned the fuck out of it but the truth of the matter is nothing like that will ever get made that feels 100% real. So, all things considered, they did a fine job.

Somehow I feel like this question might have been asked, but here goes. If you could be any body part on a female, which would it be? Same question for a male. Also, if you could be a body part on an animal, which animal and what body part would it be?

THe Pussy, dude! I’d just wanna get fucked all the time and when I got my period! woo hooo!!!!!
nah…obviously, i would never wanna be a vagina. Ever.
Okay, here’s the thing about this question…what is like to be a body part? Like, being a leg would be useful but would I have thoughts? Probably not. I’d say being a breast would be mellow. Every now and then I get rubbed but for the most part, I just hang out.
For a guy? being a dick would actually be okay cause that’s basically what we are anyway. Dicks are like our compasses. They’re dumb and have a terrible sense of direction but still, they do guide us more often than not.
What animal would i be? A bird would be cool cause, you know, flight. I would be a falcons beak. Why the fuck not?

If you met yourself from the future, how would you know it’s you?
I’d probably look about the same. I haven’t aged THAT much in the last 20 years. I mean, obviously, I’m older and not as pure as i once was but I haven’t had any great physical fall off. Old, saggier skin…probably in the same cloths. I think it would be easy to spot me, to be honest.

You’ve had some people play bass and guitar on your albums. Do you play any instruments too?
This is one of those FAQ type questions. I don’t play any instruments. I can figure things out on a keyboard but thats about it.

Answers for Questions vol. 278

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Hey guys! I’m writing this from a hotel room in Moscow. Time no longer exists to me. Sleep is a concept, not a real thing. But, still, I’m loyal to this blog. So, I’m doing it! This is “Answers for questions” You guys ask me stuff, I respond honestly. so simple. If you’d like to join the fun, go for it. Send questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or simply leave them in the comment section below. Get weird. Be interesting. it makes it better for all of us.
Let’s see what we got this week. Lots of focused , nerdish questions. Whelp, okay!

RAPID FIRE!
– What would you do if making music for a living stopped paying the bills? / Do you have a retirement fund?
I have no idea. It’s something I think about as I continue to age. I’ve been good with my money and i own a home so I’d maybe get involved in some sort of business like a restaurant or a bar. I do Not have a retirement fund though.

– What would your job have been if you couldn’t make music for a living?
Some bullshit. All my jobs prior to music were service industry or places a record store. I’d imagine I might be bartending. Honestly, I’m a college drop out. I’m not exactly trained for anything. In a dream world, i’d be writing for something comical but you know, that’s a best case scenario.

– You seem pretty laid back. What irritates you the most on a daily basis?
Inconsiderate people and slow people. They can often be one in the same. But when I see someone who’s clearly only thinking about themselves, it’s makes my blood boil. And people who are slow are just an extension of that. They’re basically like “Oh, you’re time is important to you? How about go fuck yourself cause the world begins and ends with me and my personal clock”. Side note: I’m the promptest person of all time.

– Do you have a favorite country to visit while touring?
I feel like I haven’t visited it yet. I loved Australia (and I’m going back this fall) but I’d like to see Spain and maybe Iceland. To be honest, I travel so much that leaving NYC is never something I really feel like doing for pleasure.

– If you had to go on a 2 week vacation with Adele where would you go?
Probably some fancy island where she would pay for everything. I bet she’s fun.

– Who are some of your favorite visual artists?
Truth be told, I don’t really follow that world. i grew up around the arts and it numbed me to it at a very young age. I can barely even appreciate it outside of a passing “Oh, that’s cool!”. There are tons of great artists out there, I’m just not really paying attention.

Why were hip hop drums so terrible in the late 90s early 2000s? Don’t get me wrong I love some 80s and early 90s drums and I love the sound and variety of today’s drums but drums across the board from underground d to main stream(with some exceptions) in the late 90s and early 2000s were very simplistic and weak. There was no knock. And I say this Looking back because I am talking about songs from an era that were important to me (I am 32. So like my HS era). Was it because of equipment of the era? People making there own kits and not sampling? Or was it just a shitty trend?

I don’t know if I agree with your opinion but I think what you’re referring to was the growth in popularity in synthesized drums sounds, versus good old break beats. I contend that both have their merits. People stopped using break beats or chopped up parts of breaks and started using sounds that came from certain keyboards. It made of a cleaner, less authentic feel. I think some of it worked fine though. It was when people started dabbling with 808 kits (aside from miami bass music from the late 80’s/early 90’s) on a larger level. Southern raps emergence played into that. I dunno…i think you can make dope drums with any thing if you use them right.

You have answered sampling questions before but do you have any insight as to why sampling keeps going away and coming back? I know sampling started to fade out in the late 90s because of lawsuits and the popularity of Swizz beats and Timbo. But I am confused as to nowadays it seems that Record labels could pay for samples and Indy artist couldn’t. And now record labels rarely clear samples unless you are Kanye. But Indy artists still sample tons of records I notice. Do Indy artists just say fuck it, because they figure they won’t get sued? For the record I much prefer sample based records.

It goes away cause it is both dangerous and a money pit. When you sample, you cannot license the song to tv or commercials. That’s where a lot of money comes for people making beats. Even if you do clear the sample, the writer of said sample will get the lions share of the money so it’s kinda pointless. However, it comes back because sampling is timeless. People will always like a nice samples loop. Any time a major artist releases a song with a sample, it becomes a hit. “Hotline Bling” is a perfect example. As for indy guys still sampling, it’s cause they don’t clear shit and just keep their stuff under the radar. Only people on a major stage have to worry about getting caught or , even having enough sales and radio play for the owners of the sample to notice, let alone deem them worthy to sue.

I’ve noticed that you seem to be less ‘nerdy’ than most of the emcees you’ve worked with or around (Aesop, Slug, EL-P, Vast Aire, Illogic, Murs etc) does this affect your social dynamic or interactions at all?

We’re all nerdy on some level The type of music we make kinda dictates that. Even something cool like “Run the Jewels” is still kinda nerdy at it’s core. And that’s a good thing. Nerdy just means being obsessive about something. it could be star wars or it could drums machines. We all got our “thing”.
In everyday life, i’m not really a nerd type though. I’m socially comfortable. I like going out. I like doing things. I play sports. Not saying those other guys don’t but being a nerd is not something I’ve been accused of in my day to day ever in my life.

Could you beat Rhonda Rousey in a fight?
Fuck no. She’s beat the shit out of me. I’d last maybe 4 seconds before I tapped out or just cried.

Answers for Questions vol. 277

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Hey there everyone. Hope you enjoyed your long weekend (US ONLY). This is answers for questions. You guys ask me stuff, I answer. Simple stuff. If you’d like to ask me anything, please do! Send Questions to phatfriendblog@gmail.com or simply leave them in the comment section below. Be weird. Be creative!
Also, I’m leaving for a european/russian/tel aviv tour on wednesday so I dunno how functional this blog will be while I’m gone. You never know but don’t be surprised if I don’t post for a week or so. Not like you care but for the 4 or 5 people who do…just a heads up.

Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like you were going to die?

Hmm…I’ve been in situations where i’ve felt very threatened (being robbed at gun point, a plane having insane turbulence then the lights flicker off, a car crash where we flipped over, seeing a shooting at a pool hall) but I honestly can’t say I ever felt I was gonna die.
In all the cases above I just sort of assumed things wouldn’t get that far. I’d say the car and plane situations were the scariest cause those were out of my control. But turbulence happens and the car crash happened so quick, it didn’t really give me time to think i was really going to die.
Now that I think about it…the closest I’ve come to truly feeling like I might die was choking on pizza cheese while eating alone in my house once. I legit had to reach in my throat and pull the cheese out cause I couldn’t breath. That was one case where I felt a legit moment of terror and mortality.

What are some of your favorite names of porn films? Strictly talking about the name, regardless of subject matter. Have their been any films name after hip hop artists/albums that you’ve come across?
The whole idea of funny porn names is far more hypothetical that a reality. Sure, “Edward Penishands” exists and there have been plenty of porn parodies of real movies but the majority of them are called shit like “Latino cum swappers 28” and “Where the boys Aren’t vol 39282”.
I have yet to see a porn that references something hip hop related outside of the obvious “Hip hop honeys” kinda shit that’s basically using the phrase hip hop to mean “black”.
It’s a shame cause you could flip rap album titles into porn titles easily…
“It takes a nation of millions to hold this cock”
“Gay outta compton”
“All guyz on me”
“Step in the anal-rena”
“The gape adventures of Slick Rick”
“The Life of Pablo”

Sup. Got a question. Beyond Reach is one of my fav tracks you made because of the lyrics. Who wrote ’em? How did Baby Dayliner and you came up with the song? You both share the emotions of the lyrics?

Beyond reach” was a song that Baby Dayliner had made way back in the 90’s. It was done on a four track and he made it while he was still searching out his sound. He wrote the whole thing. I had always loved it and thought about sampling it in some way cause it never came out and it was just sort of sitting there.
I forget exactly how my version came about but I must have been reminded of that song and thought “I should remix that on my album”. I hit up Baby Dayliner and asked if he had a copy and he sent it to me. That’s about it. The piano and vocals are all parts of his original song. everything else, I added. As for the emotions of the song, it always hit a nerve with me. I can’t say I relate personally to those feelings of young loneliness but the overall mood definitely grabbed me.

Being an “anarchist”, I believe that society’s endstate will be one of freedom from wage slavery, and having machines care for our immediate needs – also, money will stop being a thing. It might take a thousand years (if we survive that long), but I think it will come around.

My question then is: do you think people will still be rapping, or b-boying or doing graffiti or whatever without money being a part of it? Without the profit motivator determining the charts? Without labels propping some acts up and not others? Or is material gain and fame an indispensable part of the industry? (save for some small acts that defy it)

This already happened in a sense. When record sales started to not matter anymore, the whole landscape of music (especially hip hop) changed. People no longer could “get signed” and “sign a big deal”. MTV stopped playing videos. Everything was illegally downloaded. So, all these people who were angling to make rap music simply as a means to get rich were suddenly in a bind. It’s no coincidence this happened during on of the most stale eras of rap. The mid 2000’s.
However,once that smoke cleared, there was an abundance of great music getting made by people who simply did it cause they love it. That was around 2009/10. So, i feel as though, no matter what happens to money and rap, there will still always be people making the music. To many artists, it’s like a itch. You can’t leave it alone cause it’s not bringing home a profit. Think of all the people out there who are in their mid-30’s, still doing local shows, opening for mid-level acts. They do it cause they love it. Sure , some may be delusional but, deep down, they know they aren’t gonna “Make it”. They keep pushing forward cause it’s what they enjoy doing.

Can you see yourself ever dating a woman who is REALLY in to any of this nerdy stuff? Like maybe not all at once, but she REALLY likes a few things from the list? What are your general thoughts on these hobbies for an adult, be it a man or woman?

Video Games
Science Fiction or Fantasy movies
Comic Books
Collecting toys
Card Games (Magic the Gathering, Yugioh)
Board Games (The new complicated ones that no one has ever heard of.)
Renaissance Fairs
LARPing (Live action role-play)
Cosplay (Dressing up like characters from movies, comics.)
Collecting crystals

I mean, if she doesn’t expect me to take part or care about those things then it would be fine with me. It would only be an issue if those things interfered with our relationship. Thinking realistically, it may be hard to keep some of those things separate from a relationship but I’d be willing to at least try if every other thing about this hypothetical girl was awesome.
The first 6 things on the list all seems workable. As we get into things where dressing up and pretending come into play, i might be a little wary. If not just totally embarrassed. Like, more power to people who do that but I don’t ever wanna be forced to have to go to one of those things for a millisecond.
Also, collecting crystals is fine and probably the least offensive thing towards the back of the list but if that girl wanted to talk to me about crystals at any point, I could not date her. In general, I feel people who collect crystals and I have a different life view. Doesn’t mean we can’t be friends…I just can’t see a crystal person and me ever truly connecting with any depth cause, well, I just don’t buy into that shit and they do. Similar to religion. Like, if you’re someone who feels strongly about your faith, i support that but it will eventually become an issue if we were to be together cause it’s a basic difference in beliefs that you’re eventually going to have to face.

Artificial Intelligence seems to be gaining popularity as the next thing the Technology sector is bent on figuring out. I feel like AI is making that same evolution into our general acceptance as Facebook and Google did, but it’s is way more deserving of our scrutiny. What are thoughts and predictions about the involvement of AI in the future of our world?

It would seem that the internet is well on its way to becoming a sentient being. Like you say, the tech people are obsessively working on all things AI related. From robots to figuring out ways to make advertisements seem more interesting.
I can’t say i lose sleep over this kinda thing but it is certainly the type of idea that, if you stop and think about it for any amount of time, you could spiral into a pit of fear and despair towards what the future may hold. Robocop could be a reality. Cars that drive themselves. Robots that learn and evolve like people do. it’s all possible and will very likely happen in our lifetime. Personally, I miss rotary phones.

I am trying to get back into reading but it is a bit challenging and I’m not sure what to get into. When is the last time you read a book and what was it? If you don’t read very much, pretend you do – what kinds of books would you go for?

You could not ask a worse person this question. I loath reading. It bores me to death and I honestly haven’t read a book in years. The only time I’ve read books for “pleasure” is when I was traveling a lot and knew I’d have tons of downtime with nothing to do. I can’t even recall the last book I read. Probably someones autobiography. It’s been that long. Maybe Tina Fey’s book? Pretty sure I bought it in an airport bookstore last second.
So, yeah, i can’t even pretend to tell you what to read. I don’t have a favorite author. I don’t curl up with a good book ever. It’s just not for me. Never has been, most likely never will be.