This week in ridiculous rap: The Assassin

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You know, I’ve been pretty dismissive of lots of european rap over the years. Admittedly, this is more of a personal taste thing. I don’t really hate it, I just don’t find myself wanting to listen to it. Because of this , I don’t try to focus on it much when finding ridiculous rap. It’s pointless and tends to just start arguments with people online I really don’t care to be having.
That said, every now and then, you get thrown a jewel. A reader submitted this artist to me and , man…thank you ,bro.
The Assassin comes to us from Cork Ireland. He’s..umm…kinda old. Well, lemme allow him to introduce himself to you

Okay, now that you’ve met and you have a little background. Let’s check out the music.

So, this is where it gets confusing. Is this some elaborate Tim and eric skit? Or is this real? As always, I’m torn. Cause While I think this would be a genius goof, I feel as though it’s definitely not. Which leads me to the same sad feeling I get watching “American Idol” auditions , when they cart out some obviously deranged person so laugh at.
Now, this guy doesn’t seem deranged as much as he’s just misguided. He’s no worse than some 55 year old dad who starts a band with some other 55 year old dads who, in the back of their minds, think they still got a chance to make it.
It’s kinda sad cause the videos obviously cost money. His songs ( “champion” in particular) are crafted to be some sort of Eminem like anthem. As if he envisioned this playing at soccer games or something. I mean, his fuckign sweatshirt says “Money” on it. So you know it’s serious biznassss.
I dunno. Wildly delusional people have always fascinated me. It’s an special skill to mute everything that goes on around you and proceed forward. While I can’t be in the same room with them in real life, watching them on my computer is like s sociological orgy in my mind.
This guy could be far more innocent than that though. He could just be a guy doing this for the love. Which is fine. No harm in that. I think what gets me the most about it is the time and effort he put into the promotional side of things. I wish I had that kind of gumption!
Whatever the case, The Assassin exists…and he’s here to win.