If you’ve been reading this blog for a little while, you might have noticed that I’m a fan of porn. Like David Cross once said “I like to use it to masturbate to”.
Now, before I get into this, I want to 100% admit, this idea is a total rip off of what my Girls Desboobs and GlossyLoca did on their blog “The Boobs” a while back, In fact, it’s even the same girl. But, you know what? I’m a dude and I got a different angle on this. I also plan on doing more installments of this with other porn stars as well as people who work in other parts of the sex industry. If you’re at all like me, you find that shit fascinating. I made up these questions just to get an insight on , not only the business of porn but the girls themselves. I really asked them to be honest and not treat this like a penthouse forum letter. Thus far, they’ve obliged and have been totally awesome. (PS: if you are a porn actress or work in the sex industry and would like to fill out the questionnaire, hit me up at Phatfriendblog@gmail)
So, the first subject is the Lovely Kristina Rose. She was cool enough to take the time and answer this long ass Questionnaire and , for that, I owe her a Mcdonalds dinner (I swear, that was what she wanted).
Here’s a clip of her playing an amazingly accurate Elaine from the Seinfeld porno
Where you from?
100% Southern Cali Girl OC/SD/LA
About a girl:
Do you read much?
I like to read but I don’t get the chance to read as much as I’d like. My favorite is Bukowski.
Do you watch a shit load of TV? If so, what shows?
Yes! I do! I watch really bad reality TV. Bad Girls Club, Bait Car, Real Housewives of Whatever fucking city (except NJ & OC, They’re kinda boring), Jersey Shore, Maury Povich, any True Life, Toddlers and Tiaras, Wipeout, RuPaul’s Drag Race, Top Model, Project Runway, Cops, Cheaters. I watch a lot of crap.
Do you watch porn on your own time?
Mostly just for research now. Not really too much for pleasure anymore. lol.
How often do you exercise?
Never. Just whatever exercise I get at work.
Can you do 10 man style push ups?
I don’t think so and I’m not about to get up and try either.
What’s your type? (IE: Skater, tHug, rock dude, MMA fighter, Nerd, Questionably straight)
I don’t have a certain type of look I go for. I’ve dated all kinds of guys. I’m more about personality. I like cool guy. I like funny too. AND CONFIDENCE is a MUST. I can’t be fucking with insecure dudes. That’s a no go. Total turn off. Also my type must have a job, car & got some stuff going on… Not a bum. Kind of a dick (only kinda tho.. just enough to keep me interested). I am partial to artistic types and I’m super attracted to ambitious guys.
What’s good height for a dude?
I like guys that are a head taller than me at least. I’m 5’1 so almost everyone is tall to me.
You down with fat guys?
I’m not trying to bang the fattest man in the world but I’m down with guys that are thick. lol. Some of my friends call me a chubby chaser. I do usually like guys that have a mini layer of fat. Not OBESE! But I can get down with a Jonah Hill mid weight-loss, maybe even pre.
What race is your favorite? (it’s ok, no one will think you’re racist)
lol. I don’t think I have a favorite race. I think white guys have the hardest time trying to approach me tho, because every horrible exboyfriend I ever had was a white guy so I’m kinda unconsciously prejudice against white guys I think.
How important is a male’s body hair situation?
I’m kinda big on this. I hate, hate, HATE when a man is shaving all his hair off &/or doing way too much manscaping. Men are supposed to be hairy. That’s why girls like them. If I wanted to be with something smooth, soft and not hairy I would be a lesbian. Men that shave too much or are too into body hair removal are suspect. In my opinion at least.
Girls always talk about how important a guys hands are. That’s bullshit, right?
Haa, haa. I don’t think a man’s hand size has too much to do with anything. But I will admit a dude with really tiny hands is kinda creepy to me. I can’t fuck with that. IDK, I’m kinda into hands lately. I like them super big so I can really feel like a woman when they are pushing me around and holding me down. 😛
This is a hot topic for men. Pretty much, no matter what they say, every dude alive wants to know these answers cause we’re all obsessed with our own penis. Is it childish? fuck yeah. But trust me, this will be the most closely read part of this entire interview. PLEASE be honest.
If you had to pick, 5 inches and thick or 10 inches and thin?
There’s two different types of girls. Girls that prefer fat and girls that prefer long. I’m more concerned with length than girth. But I have girlfriends that don’t like long dicks or skinny dicks. They’d rather have it short and fat. Basically, penis’s are to women what boobs are to men. Some guys like tiny perky, some guys like big and fake or big and real. Some girls like a lot of length. Some girls would rather have it short and fat. Me, I wanna feel that shit so deep in my vag.. I wanna feel it come out my throat through my asshole. ;P
On a scale of one to ten, how much does size really matter to you?
On a scale of 1-10 on how much does size really matter to me I’d have to say: 8 1/2.
I’ve dated guys that were on the smaller/more normal side and have had good sex. BUT It’s not the same as having good sex with a guy that has a big dick. And I have a tendency to be more considerate/more respectful towards a dude on the day to day if he’s got that big giant make me cum like crazy dick. It’s just fact. I’ll take more shit from a dude if the dick is good.
Name a porn guy who’s dick is too big (if there is such a thing)
I’ve worked with a lot of big dudes. I don’t really think there is such a thing as a dick being too big. But definitely, I need to be in the right mood to take guys like Mandingo, Lexington Steel, Nacho Vidal, Manuel Ferrara. I think those are the biggest guys I’ve worked with.
Crooked dicks: A problem or something you can work with?
You can work with a crooked dick. Sometimes that will work in your favor! You could hit a spot you’ve never had hit before. Unless you curve down and your dick is really long. This seems to be the one kinda curve that most girls have trouble taking.
Do you feel like you constantly wanna smack the shit out of most of the other actresses in the business or do you find you get along with most of them?
The porn business is like high school. And Yes, there is a lot of porn bitches I’d love to slap the shit out of. Every girl in the business has her list of “oh I can’t stand that bitch”. I’m friends with some of the girls my friends can’t stand, my friends are friends with some of the girls I can’t stand and a bunch of us hate the same bitches. We’re in our twenties and we all act like we’re still in junior high. It’s all pretty comical.
Has what has gone down in scene ever led to a fist fight with another girl who you had just done that scene with?
Never a fist fight for me personally. Even though we do porn we still have to be professional. Every once and a while you’ll hear about a fight going down on set. And those bitches are usually drunk. lol. If I got a problem with a girl during a scene like if she is annoying me or whatever, I just take it out on her during the scene. lol… like smother a girls face with my ass so I don’t have to hear her dumb voice.
I know porn actresses have lists of dudes they won’t work with. Who’s #1 on your “No fly” list?
All the guys that switch and do both gay and straight porn. Just because why would you do gay porn if you aren’t gay and if you are gay and doing straight porn why would you do that either. What does a gay man know about fucking pussy and why as a straight man would you do something you’re not into with another man?? I don’t trust someone with my body if they are going to force themselves to do something they openly admit they don’t like to do with their own body. People that do those kind of things for money are suspect and usually lead a risky lifestyle.
How often to people fart during scenes? And how do you stop laughing when that happens?
It happens from time to time. Hopefully you’re working with someone that’s cool and not such a pussy that they wont give you a heads up. If you fart and don’t give me a heads up, I will call you out and/or try to fart in your face.
How long were you working before you felt comfortable in front of the camera?
I felt pretty comfortable right away. I think by like 6 or 7 months in I had the kinks worked out and felt 100% comfortable in front of the camera.
What’s the best place to film? indoors? outdoors? on a bed? On a kitchen table? on top of a freshly killed bear (I’ve seen this video…it exists)?
I saw the bear video. It made me cry!
The best place to fuck is at a house. We always prefer a bed or a couch, but for me i don’t really care as long as there is a toilet and a shower on location. Outside sucks because they usually want us outside when it’s winter and freezing or when it’s like 10,000 degrees in the valley. That’s not fun.
Is a DP scene ever worth it? And do you secretly thing the two dudes doing it are kind of gay?
For me a DP scene is always worth it. lol. That check is FAT and really there’s not much I can do other than take it and try to fuck back. And honestly, it makes me laugh, kinda cuz all I can think about is two dudes bumping balls cuz they’re trying to poke me. lol. It’s like a cruel joke the director is playing on the male performers and I get paid more money.
You a drinker? If so, like a party time drinker or one of those motherfuckers that likes wine?
I’m not really a drinker. Drinking seems to always get people in trouble. I like to stick to my ganja. But when I do drink, I like beer. One 24oz Modelo and I’m $.
PERSONAL SEX LIFE
You gotta man?
I got a friend.
Has fucking on camera made off camera sex better or worse for you?
Fucking on camera has changed the things that I’m into sexually and the way I look at sex off camera for sure. Like before porn my sexual fetishes were much different than they are now. Like I was super into role playing and and dirty talk and super cliche shit like that, etc. And those are still things that turn me on but the things that I find myself liking or needing during sex now are much different than the things that turned me on before. The things that turn me on during sex off camera now are things that kinda have nothing to do with sex at all, so much. My personal life sex is much more intense & complex than the sex I have on camera, even though my personal life sex contain less circus acts. I don’t really like to give away the things that I’m into in my personal life sex. I kind of save those kinks just for me.
Do you actually enjoy anal? Do you do it in your normal sex life? If so, how long did it take get to the point where you liked it?
I actually love anal. Unlike most porn girls, I was really into anal sex before I even started porn. Girls either love it or hate it. There’s no in between. I am one of those girls that loves it. Although I don’t give the booty up to just anyone off camera. Actually, in my personal life I’ve only given the booty up to boyfriends. I can’t let a dude do butt sex on me in my personal life unless I really like him and trust him.
Any position where the man is on top of me or controlling what I do. I like to feel the weight of a dude pushing me around.
Scale of 1-10 how much do you like just laying in bed with a dude you like and making out for hours?
I can’t just make out and I usually never get to anyways. I always date guys that hate kissing. It’s like a running joke.
I do like to kiss tho, but I don’t want to do it forever. I’d much rather make out for a little bit, fuck, smoke my weed, eat a snack then take a nap while homeboy catches up on SportsCenter. I could do that in a rotation for hours!!
As for cumming, do you find you get off better from clitoral stimulation, getting fucked with a penis, a mixture of both or you’re not someone who cums much (or at all)?
I used to be much more into clitoral stimulation, but that was only because no one had ever made me cum from just fucking me. Then after this one time when this dude with a really long dick made me cum by fucking me I was done with all that! My thinking is, I can make my clit cum by myself all day everyday! But only a man can make me cum by fucking my pussy. So, now I like cumming most when it’s a penis that is making me do it because I can’t do what he can do to my pussy by myself. But even then I can’t get that kind of cum from just any old penis. My vagina is kind of a diva.
Do you do the gagging on a dick thing in your normal sex life?
I love sucking dick and I’m totally about a good old fashioned face fuck. When I really like a guy I usually wanna spend my whole entire day worshipping his cock with my mouth. I’m a rare breed.
Cum: Is it at all gross to you?
Sometimes. It depends whose it is. I’ll have fantasies about wanting to suck all the cum out of a certain dudes penis, but it’s always a certain dude’s cum. Never just any old dude’s cum.
Are you actually bi-sexual in the sense that you would date another woman?
I can never say never but I don’t know if I could be in a relationship with a woman. I like dicks too much.
Does it bug you out when you meet a fan and you just know he’s masturbated to you? or is that somehow a turn on?
I’m so jaded now. That kind of thing really doesn’t faze me.
Assuming you’re on twitter, do many celebrities ever try and fuck you via DM?
Yes they do. lol. All the time. Or they try to get ahold of me through mutual friends.
In real life, have you ever been hit on by anyone super famous? Name names?
Super famous?? IDK about all that. lol. Maybe. I think I’m gunna save this one for my book. 😉
Without naming names, have multiple famous married men offered you money for sex?
Famous guys that have tried to approach me are usually just tying to fuck for free. lol. Like some men think because they’re “celebrities”, us porn girls are supposed to feel lucky that they have chosen us and we’re just supposed to give it up. They forget we get paid for sex. We’re whores, not groupies.. (well, most of us).
Peep more of Kristina at her personal website:
If you would like to be a gentleman and buy Kristina gifts, go here:
She will also be performing out east very soon. Peep the gigs!
Signing for Jules Jordan Video at Exxotica NJ Nov. 4-6 & Dancing in Queens, NY at Xpertease Nov. 18 & 19