To most men, Valentine’s day is nothing we look forward to. When most guys think of Valentines day, regardless of their own relationship status, I’d say indifference is as positive as it gets. I use the word “most” strictly as a precaution that there is some weird dude out there who truly gets into the spirit of this shitty fake holiday. I’m not entirely convinced this person exists but , hey, anything is possible. So, if you’re that guy , a big shout out goes to you from the bottom of my cold heart…and also, what the fuck is wrong with you?
ANNNNYWAY, In terms of “holidays”, V-day ranks somewhere between Boxing day (for non-canadians) and “Eat a bag of shit day” (also for non-canadians). At best, it’s a good meal and sex with a person whose company you enjoy (which, by the way, pretty much should be an “all the time” thing for any happy couple). At it’s worst, it’s a shame spiral of loneliness OR utter resentment towards the person you happen to be with at that moment. Obviously, this is nothing new. My issue is that this day really just becomes a second birthday for whatever girl happens to be involved. At least that’s the standard. I mean, if flowers are involved, there’s a good chance you’re dealing with some corny girl related celebration. This leads to mens hands being forced and a small layer of resentment over a one sided holiday that exists primarily to put unneeded pressure on and annoy men. I don’t know how that really became to be but that seems to be par for the course for any holiday where gifts are involved. After all, we are men. We are both cheap and , generally, not very romantic. God forbid that “romance” be forced. Sure, we get “gifts”. Like maybe your girl wears sexy lingerie and begrudgingly lets you hit it from the back. But you know what? The promise of sex , as our gift, is both insulting and boring. If we’re in a relationship and we’re only fucking on holidays , it may be time to look into a new relationship.
This year, my girl and I opted to do our Valentines day a day early. Meaning, we went out to a nice dinner on sunday instead of today. WIN. Good food>>>>Made up love holidays. I’m very thankful to be with a girl who doesn’t buy into this shit to the point where it’s ever an issue. I have friends who are not so lucky.
Now, you single people have it easy. Instead of wallowing in this imposed loneliness, have fun with it! Go out and get some ass! Valentines day is when all the lonely hearts clubs hits the bar to drink away their fake sorrows over being alone. What better time than now to capitalize on getting laid? I’m just saying, if you’re genuinely upset over your situation on this , the most worthless of holidays, do something about it. Trust me , you’re not alone. There’s another dipshit right down the bar , thinking the exact same thing as you. Perhaps you two can exchange genitals? This Valentine’s day, HPV is the gift that keeps giving. Spread love, yo.
So, for all you miserable motherfuckers out there wishing you had someone to cuddle with or wishing the person you were cuddling with would shut the fuck up and leave you alone, this is for you.
Here’s a mix of songs with the word “Love” in the them that aren’t exactly love songs. Ranging from Necro to random 60’s soul music to King Sun to Hank williams, this one covers all sorts of bases.
Personally, I’d like nominate “Love in ya mouth” as the official Valentine’s day theme song for everyone.
Love Shmove Mix
1)Love is a hurtin’ thing: Lou Rawls
2)Lovesick Blues: Hank Williams
4)Undercover Lover: King Sun
5)Tainted Love: Gloria Jones
6)Don’t Love you: TV on The Radio
7)Love-buiding onfire: The Talking heads
8)Love Vs. Hate: Brand Nubian
9)Dead and Lovely: Tom Waits
10)Bloody love letter:MF Grimm
11)I’m falling out of love: Skull Snaps
12)Is the any love?: Trevor Dandy
13)Dead love: YZ
14)I love you (you know I don’t): The Frogs
15)Love in ya mouth: Kilo Ali
16)Thin line between love and hate: Necro
17)The hate that love made: NYOIL
18)Ohh, We love you Rakeem: PRince Rakeem (The RZA)